INSIDE:Common Coregoes rectal ^ What's UP ^at the Libraries? MLK 1968page three page 11The Chicago Maroonie 97, No. 39 The University of Chicago ©Copyright 1986 Fridav. Aoril 4. 19Volume ©Copyright Friday, April 4, 1986Heisman trophy kidnapped and held hostageBy Vish E. BuhoThe first Heisman Trophyawarded to Jay Berwanger in1935 has been kidnapped by aradical fringe group and is beingheld hostage. The Maroon hasreceived exclusive photos and anote from the group which hasno name but refers to itself as aradical fringe group.This terrorist organizationfirst grabbed headlines almostten years ago when they kid¬napped the Silas Cobb bust fromCobb hall. The Cobb kidnappinghas never been solved and thebody has never been discovered.The kidnapping, which hassent shockwaves throughout thecommunity, apparently hap¬pened sometime over springbreak. According to the chief ofsecurity here at the U of C, itwas a very professional job. Theperpetrators gained access toBartlett Gymnasium by smash¬ing several windows. They thendisarmed the burglar alarm thatguards the trophy room appar¬ently by frequent blows with aheavy blunt instrument. Once inthe trophy room, they used glasscutters to free the Heisman fromits case. The loss of the trophywas not noticed for several days.The note given to the Maroonby the group claiming responsi¬ bility had a partial list of de¬mands and said that more de¬mands would be forth assoon as the group decided uponan ideology. The key demand inthe note was that students stayoff the grass where there arepaths worn through it. The groupsays, “As a professional ter¬rorist organization, we havevery finely developed aestheticalsensitivity, and it pains usgreatly to see such unsightlycowpaths.”In a bizarre twist, the groupseems to regard the University’spresident Hanna Gray as itshero and may be trying simplyto impress her. Other demandsinclude calls for students to stopprotesting and instead supportthe President’s tuition increases,her wish to increase the size ofthe College, and to “...generallyjust get off the woman’s case!’’President Gray is also referredto in the notes as “her holiness,that great Goddess, and red hotmama.”Police and University securityadmit that they have no leads onthe case, but they remain op¬timistic. Security chief CliffJohnson said, “All we have to dois round up students who supportthe president for questioning.continued on page 16 'his Door statue is being held hostageU of C and Northwestern meet in ROTC war gamesBy Kate E. KurmulisDespite student and facultyprotest, the University hasscheduled a number of ROTCactivities to be held on campusthis quarter as a joint venturewith Northwestern University.B.S. Quartermen of UniversityPublic Relations says that hefeels very excited about theROTC activities and believesthat they will convince the ma¬jority of the student body, “be¬yond a shadow of doubt that afull-fledged ROTC programwould be a real benefit to theUniversity community.”A number of student groupshave voiced the concern thatROTC events on campus conflictwith University statements ear¬lier in the year that militarygroups would not be allowed torecruit on campus, and thatweapons research also would notbe permitted. Quartermen saidthat the University plans tocomply with promises it made tostudent groups and to physicsfaculty and students earlier inth<? year, “at least for the timebeing. That’s the beauty of theplan as it currently stands,” hecontinued, “We get to have allthe hardware, while North¬western handles all of the re¬cruiting, disciminatory policies,and actual weapons research,since they are sensible enoughnot to have any qualms aboutthat sort of stuff.”US Army Sergeant Dianne“Die-Hard” Cookston is incharge of implementing the ac¬tual program She says that thefirst major activity will takeplace this Saturday from nineam to ten pm on the Midway.“We decided that we neededsomething big and eye-catchingto drum up some student interestin ROTC on what has tradition¬ally uevn a kuiu uf liberal cam pus. So we’ve decided to use thenatural, healthy rivalry betweenthe U of C and Northwestern toour advantage. While the twoschools are cooperating in ournew Weapon Share program, weare going to sponsor a series ofwar games between them.”Cookston said that a few safetyprecautions should be taken bystudents who are not participat¬ing in the games. “We’re usinglive ammo cut there to give thefeel of real combat, so I’d adviseanybody who isn’t playing toavoid the Midway after ninesince it will be the main theaterof action. Things could get reallymessy in that area. We also ad¬vise students in Breckinridge,International House, andWoodward Court to follow black¬out procedures after five pm onSaturday since civilian targetsare fair game. Of course if youusually park your car on theMidway you might want to moveit since, as in real combat, when things get dirty civilian vehicleswill be appropriated to carryupper level commanders.”University officials also wantto inform students that theShoreland buses will not be fol¬lowing their regular schedulesduring the games since the buseswill be used to transportwounded to Billings Hospital.The famed “Maroon Thunder’’the U of C’s helicopter, will notbe available for hospital use as itwill be carrying dox lunchesfrom Woodward Court to partic¬ipants.Cookston said the despiteprobable damage to Universitypersonel and facilities, the U ofC has a great advantage in hav¬ing the games staged on thehome front. “We’ve got anti¬aircraft guns mounted atopHinds, Cummings, and Kerstenso that we can defend the Ad¬ministration Building to the lastman, and woman, if need be.The battlements on the top of all those buildings can rotate, sothey re perfect for defenseagainst airborne weaponry.”Wh ^n questioned more closely asto why the three new buildingshad been built with rotating topsand strange projectiles,Cookston admitted that they area part of long-term planning thatthe University has been doingfor the war games. “Surethey’re funny-looking, but weknew that everyone would ac¬cept them as “80’s look” archi-teeuxe until the time came toreveal their real purpose. TheBy Jule E. BiggeCancellation of the LasciviousCostume Ball (LCB) hassparked a storm of protestthroughout the University. Asone economics graduate student,who. due to his connections witha national corporation, wishes tobe unnamed, summarized, “Weall just want to get naked!”A number of events concern¬ing the LCB cancellation tookplace during exam period andduring spring break. A rec¬apitulation of the major eventsfollows for those who have be¬come confused by the fast pacedactionThe battle began Wednesdayof tenth week when 20 studentsholding signs that read, Hanna,Let Us Strip.” and “I Want ToParty Naked.” rallied outsidethe Administration Building toprotest the LCB's cancellationFriday of tenth week threeunidentified students sprangfrom bushes near 59th and Uni¬versity Ave and monnwi Doan weaponry we have up there isyears ahead of its time in cam¬pus defense,” Cookston added.Cookston said that a number ofstudents gave up their springbreak in order to secretly trainfor the games. Prospective par¬ticipants were flow n to a base inCentral America where theylearned basic defense and sur¬vival techniques. When askedhow many students weretrained. Cookston laughed andreplied, “Well, we can't reallygive out information like thatcontinued on page 19O’Connell. The phrase “LCB’86” was painted on theij but¬tocks. Though Dean O'Connellreportedly started to chasethem, the students escaped intoWoodward Court.On Monday of finals week over100 students took a break fromtheir studies and cheered wildlyin Regenstein Library as twocouples stripped to their under¬wear on the landing of the cen¬tral stairway between the secondand third floors They turned ona small tape player, and dancedin their undies to the tune of “DoYou Want To Funk.” Unfurling aprotest banner which read“Flash For Freedom. Save theLCB.” they then marchedthrough the fourth and fifthfloors. University security of¬ficers quickly arrived on thescene, but not before the fourstudents donned sweats anddisappeared into the stacksThe action continued when onFriday of finals week a Strip-O-Gram was sent to Dean ofcontinued on page threeAngry students stagelascivious protest IIRockefeller Memorial Chapel5850 S. Woodlawn962-7000Sunday, April 6th9:00 a.m. Ecumenical Serviceof Holy Communionwith Sermon.11:00 a.m. University ReligiousServiceScott O. Stapleton,Assistant Dean of the Chapel,preacher12:15 p.m. Carillon recitaland tower tour 1The University of ChicagoO RGANIZATION OF BLACK STUDENTSIn Cooperation with DuSable Museumpresents theJOSEPH HOLMES DANCECOMPANYSaturday, April 5,19868:00 P.M.Mandel Hall$10 with UCID$20 General Admission rr nosic-nosic-nosica THE DEPARTMENT OF MUSIC 2X presents:ws Friday, April 4 • Ridge String Quartet8:00 p.m., Mandel HallKrista Bennion and Robert Rinehart, violins; Ah Ling Neu,viola; Ramon Bolipata, cello.Mozart: String Quartet in C, K.170; Berg: String Quartet, Op.3;Beethoven; String Quartet in Eb, Op.74.Admission: $10 (UC student, $6). Information and tickets atDepartment of Music Concert Office, Goodspeed Hall 310; 962-8068.♦toD Tuesday, April 8 - Tafelmusik Baroque Orchestra withMarion Verbruggen, recorder8:00 p.m. Mandel HallJean Lamon, director; Jean Lamon and Deborah Paul, violins;Stephen Marvin, viola; Christina Mahler, violoncello;Alison Mackay, violone; Charlotte Nediger, harpsichord.A. Scarlatti, Castello, Sammartini, Maki, Ishii, and Vivaldi.Admission: $10 (UC student, $6). Information and tickets atDepartment of Music Concert Office, Goodspeed Hall 310; 962-8068.♦topD655o Thursday,April 10 - Noontime Concert Series12:15 p.m., Goodspeed Recital HallJeffrey Kust, classical guitar.Music by Blackwood, Sor, Rodrigo, Brouwer, and ViHa-lobos.Admission is free. o3Friday, April 11 - Contemporary Chamber Playersof the University of Chicago8:00 p.m., Mandel HallCosponsor: Fromm Music Foundation at HarvardRalph Shapey, conductor; Elsa Charlston, soprano.A Concert of American Music - including works byRuth Crawford Seeger, Philip Fried, David Del Tredici,and Aaron Copland.Admission is free with ticket. For tickets, send request and aself-addressed stamped envelope to the Department of Music ConcertOffice, Goodspeed Hall 310; 5845 S. Ellis Ave., Chicago, IL 60637. 2CtonosionusionusicM2—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986 The University of ChicagoTHE DEPARTMENT OF ARTandTHE VISITING COMMITTEE FOR THE VISUAL ARTSannounceThe Robert B. Mayer Memorial Lecture SeriesonART and POLITICSThursday, 10 Aprill THE BAYEUX TAPESTRY: j■NORMAN PROPAGANDA OR ANGLO-SAXON SUBVERSION?!> David Bernstein, Sarah Lawrence College; \, Thursday, 24 April |! THE POLITICS OF BREUGEL J) David Freedberg. Columbia University ^Thursday, 8 May |SOME POLITICAL IMPLICATIONSOF PICASSO’S “GUERNICA”Herschel B. Chipp, University of California, BerkeleyThursday, 22 MayPUBLIC DISPLAYS IN A PRIVATIZING WORLDCarol Duncan, Ramapo College of New Jerseythe lectures will be given inCochrane-Woods Art Center Lecture Hall (room *157)5540 South Greenwood AvenueThe lectures will begin at 4:00 p.m.admission is without charge and the public is cordially invitedChanges in Common Core labsBy Jule E. BiggeMajor revisions in the Common CoreBiology program have recently been an¬nounced by Guy Fawkes, current Master ofthe Biological Sciences Collegiate Division.Under the new program, undergraduateswill fulfill their laboratory requirementsthrough active participation in biologicaland biomedical research currently beingconducted by U of C faculty.Under the present laboratory program,all students taking Common Core Biologymust complete six labs during the year¬long sequence. Most sequences spreadthese labs out over the year, so that twomust be completed each quarter. Oftenconsidered a nuisance by students, theselabs typically involved counting kernels ofcorn on a cob, watching fish swim at Shedd Aquarium, or dissecting a rat. Since theselabs have no bearing on course grade(other than the fact that they have to becompleted), students rarely show interest,and usually rely on teaching assistants toprovide answers to the questions posed inthe lab write-up.Fawkes made the Core laboratory rest¬ructuring a priority when he became Mas¬ter this past Fall. “There was almost nointerest shown by students in these labs,which I admit, were a bit simplistic andboring,” he said. He noted that the BiologyDepartment was failing to attract as manystudents as it used to, saying, “If it weren’tfor the pre-meds, we’d be dead.”Fawke s goal was to make the CommonCore laboratories more exciting, and togive undergraduates an idea of what kind of biological research is being done on thecampus. Under his program, students willbecome involved in a single laboratoryproject, working intensely with a professorfor one or two weeks. What each studentactually does will depend on the professor,the individual project, and the student’sbackground.The new program will become operativeon a large scale this fall. “Researchers arecurrently submitting proposals with thisprogram in mind,” said Fawkes, “so wehope to have many different projects linedup by Fall Quarter, enabling students tochoose a project that they find inter¬esting,” said Fawkes.Given the newness of the program, how¬ever, only one project will be undertakenwith student help this spring. Approxi-LCBcontinued from page oneStudents Charles O’Connell’s Office. DeanO’Connell was not in his office at the time,but Associate Dean of Students Ed Tur-kington accepted the message on his be¬half. Acted out by a messenger who gaveher name as “Candy”, it read, “Give usback the LCB, or we’ll turn this campusinto a Naked Hell.”Although things quieted down somewhatduring Spring Break, bulletin boardsaround campus were covered with postersshowing what appeared to be a Xeroxedcopy of a bare behind and the phrase “IWant My LCB.” The posters were quicklytorn down by University officials, but U ofC Plant Department workers say that ad¬ditional copies continue to appear sporad¬ically on the Quads.Charles A. Quimble, a Professor in theDepartment of Sociology, theorized,“Forget divestment. Forget Star Wars.Forget Noam Chomsky (I know that Ialready have). University of Chicago stu¬dents have finally found a cause to rallyaround. They are going aux barricades indefense of the Lascivious Costume Ball,with wanton acts of lasciviousness occur¬ring almost daily (see Library Sex article).Thought at first to be individual acts ofdebauchery, most of these incidents havenow been traced to a single group of dedi¬cated students who call themselves LSAP (Lascivious Students Against Prudi¬shness). “It’s an incredible social phen¬omena with which the University will haveto reckon,’’commented Quimble.When University administrators droppedthe gauntlet last quarter and cancelled theBall, they said that they expected studentresistance to be limited to the small groupof sexual deviants that patronize Cobb Cof-feeshop. Quimble said that ninth week wasa most opportune time to make the an¬nouncement, “The Maroon barely had timeto write an editorial before suspendingpublication for the quarter, and the studentbody had finals to worry about. The ad¬ministration also had a case history toexamine: in 1939, President Robert May¬nard Hutchins avoided student riots byannouncing that he was disbanding thefootball team only two days beforeChristmas vacation. A brilliant adminis¬trative move!“What the administration did not realize,however, was that its actions cut to thecore of the fragile U of C student body’spsyche. It failed to realize that the LCBwas an event that had been anticipated foralmost two years, when the first storyabout what went on there was told to lastyear’s group of freshmen. What it failed torealize is that the LCB is more than justanother party, but rather a release for the pent-up sexual frustrations of thousands.The administration cancelled the LCB toprotect the button-down, corporate imagethat it has been nurturing in the nationalmedia; in doing so I think it failed torealize the awesome potential for mischieflurking in the students’ collective con¬sciousness.”Student protest over the LCB’s cancella¬tion was fast and furious. Student Gov¬ernment President Bill Florida circulatedpetitions, lodged formal protests with theAdministration, and convinced Tribunecolumnist Mike Royko to write about it.The group was founded soon after thecancellation was announced. It originallyconsisted of only seven students who tookfor pseudonyms the names of Snow Whiteand six of the seven Dwarves (Bashful, ofcourse, was the only name not utilized).LSAP now boasts a membership of overtwo hundred, with the seven acting as theleaders of the movement. “Not all of themhave done something lascivious yet, butwe’ve got some big plans as soon as it getswarm out,” said Happy.LSAP has claimed responsibility for themooning, the Library Dance, and the Strip-O-Gram. When asked which action thegroup was most proud of, the answer wasthe library incident. “That really put us onthe map,” stated Doc, “and we saw our plannedmately 150 students will be assigned to astudy involving an external rectal catheterprobe. According to A.S. Payne, principalinvestigator in the study, the preliminarytests, as advertised in the Maroon, weresuccessful but, “To test my device fully, Iwill need a large number of subjects towear the device for eight to ten days.Naturally, I was delighted when Guy saidstudents would be available for the tests. Itwill save me quite a bit of money.” As¬suming that students perform adequatelythis spring, Payne hopes to continue withinthe Core laboratory program. “I am work¬ing on a ‘continuous flow alcohol enemasystem,’ which should be ready to test thissometime next year,” said Payne. “It willbe a beneficial learning experience forall.”ranks swell after that.” .The Administration took a less than pos¬itive view of the incident. “We are ex¬tremely disappointed in the actions of thesestudents,” stated Jonathan Kleinbard, Di¬rector of Public Relations for the Univer¬sity. “This is a serious institution of higherlearning, and for these vandals to disturbstudents who were preparing for final ex¬aminations is a crime.” Kleinbard alsospoke about the mooning incident, forwhich LSAP claimed responsibility. He in¬dicated that those responsible, if caught,would likely face expulsion, and noted thatDean O’Connell had filed a report with theChicago Police. He was uncertain howO’Connell she would go about identifyingthe students, however, since the only clearview he got was of their posteriors.LSAP’s only demand is that the Admin¬istration allow the LCB to be held as it wastwo years ago. When asked what actionsthey would take if their demands were notmet, Sleepy was evasive. “It would beridiculous to let the cat out of the bag now,or else Security would be all over us.” Hedid indicate, however, that some possiblemeasures might include a Lascivious Cos¬tume Beach on the Quads, a mass mooningof the Administration Building, and a Las¬civious Class Day.55TH & HYDE PARK BLVD.643-55005 ™ YEAR BIRTHDAY CELEBRATION!Come help us celebrate 5 years ofserving the Hyde Park andUniversity Community.Simply bring this ad in and receivea FREE DESSERT when youorder any Lunch or Dinner.OFFER valid thru April 10 andnot in conjunction with othercoupons or discounts.HOURSLunchTues.-Fri. 11:30 a. m. -2:30 p.m.Saturday 11:45 a.m. -3p.m.BrunchSunday 10:30 a.m.-2:30 p.m. DinnerMon.-Thurs. 5-10:30p.m.Fri. & Sat. 5-12 midnightSunday 5-9p.m.The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—3EDITORIALSBan that disgusting,vile Bun Bumping!As this Easter season draws to a close, children everywherethankfully nibble on the sweets brought by that most august andrespectable personage himself—the Easter Bunny. Meanwhile, theirparents return to the secular workplace with a new-found sense ofrenewal and fulfillment. Not even the recent military actions againstLibya and Nicaragua can shake the national sense of well-being andfamily wholesomeness. It seems hardly comprehensible that such aseason could be so wantonly defiled by an unprecedented onslaught oframpant immorality. Yet this is exactly the case.For years, a large profusion of rabbits during this Easter seasonwas regarded as commonplace, even desirable. Many respectableAmerican businesses (Cadbury among them) unwittingly allowedbunnies to dominate their advertising. None seemed to notice, or evencare, that they displayed a curious tendency to keep backing intoeach other. Only within the last few weeks has the Rev. Jerry Falwell(nobly assisted by Presidential aide Pat Buchanan) realized whatthose seemingly innocent rabbits were really doing.In light of this incontrovertable evidence, we must take the mostfirmly principled stand against the alarming increases in “bunny bunbumping” reported recently. Such flagrantly immoral actions faroutstriD even the unspeakable horrors performed by consentingadults at such heathenish events as the recently banned Lascivious(gasp) Costume (ugh) Ball (eek).While we firmly support the liberty of personal expression affordedby the Constitution, we cannot overlook the effect these practicesmight have on impressionable young rabbits everywhere. If not forthe anti-social, anti-American propaganda spread by these abhorrentpractices, we might be able to overcome our personal distaste forthese sick, twisted, abortion-promoting actions of deranged psycho¬paths. But when all is considered, we can only conclude that there isno other recourse but to BAN BUNNY BUN BUMPING!Administration satisfiesThe Maroon recently spent a great deal of time and effortreviewing the performance of the University. We examined all areasaffected by the University from academic to social. After a greatdeal of time and consideration we have come to the conclusion thatthe University has done a superlative job. In fact we couldn’t havedone it better ourselves.In all the areas studied, we found that the University in every waymade the world a better place for its existence. In the academicsphere the University is well known for its excellence. But our testsproved that the University excelled far beyond even the mostgenerous expectations. We have been forced to the conclusion that abetter job of educating bright young minds simply cannot be done.They have attained perfection in this area yet continue to make plansto improve even more. Isn’t that just marvelous?But part of the University’s fine reputation is built on the researchdone here. Again, in this area as well, the University has surpassedall expectations and left the crowd of competitors far behind. In theperiod examined, University researchers came up with literallydozens of wonderful new cures for all sorts of horrible diseases. Theypushed the limits of knowledge farther in one year than in the entirehistory of mankind and were reponsible for the invention of so manynew and wonderful devices as to boggle the mind.But it is in the area of social life here at the University that theyreally achieved the incredible. Life at the U of C has become asthough the garden of Eden has been opened again.There can be no doubt that such minor changes as the increase intuition and class size can only rebound to to credit of the glorious U ofC. The cancellation of the spring formal and the LCB undoubtedlyoccured so that the University can give the students here evengreater and more spectacular events that will astound the imagina¬tion and delight the senses.Our humble abilities fail in praise of our alma matter. Let us onlyhope that we are capable of feeling in our hearts the joy and gratitudedue the University.Oh, and we would like to thank the University for our brand new 72’luxury yacht.4—The Chicago Maroon-Friday, April 4, 1986 LETTERROTC instrument of deathTo the Editor:I was chagrined and saddened by theFriday June 29, 1984 issue of the Maroonwhich trumpeted the fact that the ‘ ROTCmay come to the U of C.” My motivatingenergy was drained away by this an¬nouncement, until today when I decided torespond in a fury.Is it not strange that the Air Force ROTCLt. Col. Hortter should come to the Uni¬versity, w'here the one verse for life shouldbe dominant, to seek to expand the powerand the influence of the military merchantsof death, w'hile his organization denies thereciprocal right to nonviolent individuals toteach “Thou shall not kill,” peace, love andnonviolence to his “dogs of war.” Thistotalitarian institution (all military organ¬izations are totalitarian in nature) surelyhas sufficient facilities for the training ofthose choosing the military way of life(death).The following quotation shows vividlyhow our society conditions its young todesire to go to war: Voice of Man to theCreator.“Yea, I built up colleges for the trainingof my young men in warfare. I patted them on the head saying: Ye dogs of war! Greatshall be your glory. I called to the damselssaying, a great honor I give to you. Weshall dance with the officers of death! Andthey tripped up on tip-toe, elated by thehoney of my words!To my captains and generals who showedgreat skill in killing, I built up monumentsof stone and iron. Yea, I inscribed themfrom top to bottom with their bloody vic¬tories. And in my vanity I called to theyoung saying: These monuments I havebuilded to them, the great heroes of ourcountry. And the youth of my house-holdwere whetted with the ambition for spoil.I bade them to follow me for patriotism’ssake. And yet, what was patriotism? Imade it as something greater than Theeand Thy commandment: Thou Shalt NotKill. Yea, even more than this; I persuadedmy sons and daughters that to war forpatriotism and country was to war for ourfather in heaven...”These words are somewhat different thenthe ones we use today, but the techniqueremains the same. Our youth go out to“fight for freedom.”Peter E. GregorThe Chicago MaroonThe Chicago Maroon is the official student newspaper of the University of Chicago.It is published twice weekly, on Tuesdays and Fridays.Mail subscriptions are available for $24 per year.The Maroon welcomes letters and other contributions from students, faculty, staff,and others. Anyone interested in doing writing, photography, or other work for theMaroon should stop by our office, Ida Noyes rooms 303 and 304, 1212 E. 59th Street,Chicago, Illinois 60637. Phone: 962-9555.Betty E. CrockerBaking EditorElmer E. FuddBaking Editor ElectTillery E. HillChief CynicBabbling E. BrooksFashion EditorHolly E. McChainEntertainment Editor Reggie E. SpermLeather EditorSpangles E. AndersonLace EditorSkip E. AlongRegmanJon E. HamburgerTanning InstructorCrystal E. DruidPin Up Girl Love ’em E. LieberPorno EditorBunch E. BradyExecutive ProducerHall E. MoreChief BuffoonAlex E. PlaytoyMail DrudgeBarbarella E.Grey City Journal Editor Giddy E. AnjelloHarlequin EditorBugsy E. LowmannAd StuddThe E. SteinerThe EnforcerRuthless E. MorryAd StuddefteYamie E. BooyouDisciplinarianAssociate Editors: Kent E. Hamstrung. Inga E. Fooled, Spike E. Wellagain, CookingE. SherryNilknarf E. Dadasexmobile.Staff: Arzou Ahsan, Lorraine Angus, lony Berkley, Scott Bernard, Julie Burros,Mary Beth Brady, Dennis Chansky, Sue Chorvat, Odilon Couzin, Tom Cox, ElizabethdeGrazia, Mona ElNaggar, Kathy Evans, Mike Fell, Mike Fitzgerald, Bill Flevares,Ben Forest, Andy Forsaith, Katie Fox, David Gardiner, Beth Green, Mike Green,Paul Greenberg, Michael Gorman, Kelly Hayford, Jon Herskovitz, Chris Hill, CraigJoseph, Ann Keen, Sanjay Khare, Greg Kotis, Lauren Kriz, Lara Langner, NickLanyi, Marcia Lehmberg, Meg Liebezeit, Greg Mantell, David McNulty, Steve Mera-levitz, Frank Michaels, Sam D. Miller, Michael Monahan, Melissa Moore, Karin Nel¬son, Matt Nickerson, Jean Osnos, Larry Peskin, Clark Peters, Phil Pollard, TerryRudd, Kristin Scott, Matt Schaefer, Rick Senger, Sue Skufca, Paul Song, Sonja Spear,Joel Stitzel, Frances Turner, Howard Ullmann, Christina Voulgarelis, ChristineWright.Contributors: Ted Frank, Greg Mantell, Adena Schultzberg, Anton Vogelsang.TtHhEePHhILIPeGgLlAaSsSsEeNnSsEeMmBbLlEewith:PhilipGlassKurtMunkacsiJonGibsonDoraOhrensteinMartinGoldrayRichardPeckJackKriplMichaelRiesmanAppearingSunday,April13,1986at8pmMandelHall,TheUniversityofChicago5706SouthUniversityTicketsavailableMonday,April7,atReynoldsClubBoxOffice$6.00withUCID/12.00non-studentVISAandMastercardacceptedPhone962-7300forticketinformation.■WPPiThe Chicago Maroon Friday, April 4, 1906Politics, Economics, Rhetoric & Law (PERL)in theNew Collegiate DivisionHow Do Ideas InformAction?/Tuesday, April 8 4:00 p.m. Swift Lecture HallGary Orfield: How Research Shapes CourtDecisionsProfessor of Political Science, Education and the College LOOKING FOR AN APARTMENT?(For Now or Next Year)NEED HELP? NEED INFO?Come ToREYNOLDS CLUB, NORTH LOUNGEon MONDAY, APRIL 7that 7:00 PMto hear:ED SACHS, author of The Chicago Tenant's HandbookRALPH SCOTT, leader of the Hyde Park Tenant's AssociationNELSON BROWN, attorney-expert on apartment leasesDON'T MISS THE OPPORTUNITYTO FIND OUT:HOW to look for an apartmentWHERE to look for an apartmentWHAT to look for an apartmentSPONSORED BY STUDENT GOVERNMENT - SGFCiHYDE PARKHARPER CT. at 53rd St. 288-4900Call For Friday Show TimesTOTALLY REMODELED!NEW SEATS, PROJECTION & SOUND.THREE NEW THEATRESSchedule times startingSaturday December 7,19851 POLICE ACADEMYFRI. 6:30, 8:15,10:00SAT., SUN. 1:15, 3:00, 4:45, 6:30, 8:15,10:00APRIL FOOLS DAYFRI. 6:10, 8:00, 9:50SAT., SUN. 2:30, 4:20, 6:10, 8:00, 9:50COLOR PURPLEFRI. 6 00, 9:00SAT., SUN. 1:15,6:00,9:00CARE BEARSFRI. 4:45, Sat., Sun. 12:45, 4:00wmv*BACK TO SCHOOL - STUDENT SPECIAL*★ SPECIAL PRICE - $2.50 Mon.-Thur. Last Show★ The drinks are on us —FREE DRINK with medium popcorn purchase*with U. of C. student I.D.-ilw VJLV .CHILDREN UNDER 6 NOT ADMITTED AFTER 6 P.M.S2.50 UNTIL FIRST SHOW STARTS K IMBARK LIQUORS « WINE SHOPPE ““ °*TK */«/•/»1214 East 5}rd Street • In Kimbark Plata 493-3355April Showersof Savings!!ST. PAULI GIRL GROLSCH OLD STYLE SPECIAL6-12 oz 80s 6-12 oz. Btls. 24-12 oz CANS * EXPORT6-12 oz. Btls$3«» $349 $799 7$5LF*" -’•t WINEJ. PEDRONCELU WINERYSONOMABLUSH $029750 ml W ERIKALIEBFRAUMILCH1.5 Liter $2”LOUIS GLUNZ1.5 Liter $399 CORVO750 ml. $499MOUTONCADET750 ml $499 AUGUSTSEBASTIANI1.5 Lrter $349PIPERSX-DRY$12"750 ml.LAST WEEK AT OLDPRICE—NEW PRICE $17.99 SPARKLINGPAPAGNISPARKLING WHITEZINFANDEL750 ml 2/*8 FREXINETCORDON NEGRO$459750 ml.SPIRITS| BELL'S SALE PRICE JACK *849JSCOTCH1.75 LITER $,5W4°° &A00MAIl IN *fW * •REBATE W DANIELS750 ml.! KAHLUA750 ml $8" BACARDIRUM750 ml. 5599IDRYSACK1 750 ml. $6" CANADIANMIST1.75 LITER *1049£8 REMYMARTIN750 ml! *11” SEAGRAM’SGINLITER $759 !" iCANFIELDS1 Liter 79<I pntw Mfcpcf to MmI Isom T<u Moo rhwt. 8 am lam, Sot, 60m ?om, Son Noon Mtdmght'Me oc.vpt V110, Mastercard A checki6—The Chicago Maroon-Fridav. April 4. 1986Agora evicted, Morry's opens latest restaurantFree food for security officers, says U of CBy Jule E. BiggeThe Agora, the popular Hyde Park res¬taurant located on 57th St. and KenwoodAve., has been notified by its landlord, theUniversity of Chicago, that its lease willnot be renewed. The Maroon has learnedthat Gary Orloff, owner of the Morry’schain of restaurants, will be opening a neweating emporium there July 15.Dino Alexopolous, owner of the Agora,first encountered difficulties with Univer¬sity officials when his last least expired inJuly. Wishing to make major renovations,Alexopolous sought a long-term lease,which the University was unwilling to pro¬vide. Negotiations continued until his fall,when an interim agreement was reachedcovering the current academic year.According to lam Blande, Director ofReal Estate Operations for the University,those negotiations reached impasse inFebruary. “We believed that we bargainedin good faith,” he stated, “and we weredisappointed that we were not able to cometo terms.” He went on to say that onlywhen it became apparent that an agree¬ment would not be reached did the Univer¬sity solicit bids from other possible lessees. Alexopolous offered a different accountof negotiations. “Everything was goingfine,” he said, “until our first meeting in February, when all of a sudden they cameup with outrageous demands.”Those demands allegedly included aBursar's office open longerBy Grunt E. MelnikReversing the trend towards cuttingservices offered by the Bursar's office, theUniversity announced that the Bursar willexpand and offer new services to the Uni¬versity community. The most immediateexpansion will be an extension of hoursfrom the present four hours to twelve hoursa day as well as evening hours, retroactiveto February. The Bursar will also be openfor eight hours on Saturday, and four onSundays.In addition to increased hours, the Uni¬versity hopes to offer full service bankingat the Bursar’s by early autumn quarter.Arnold Swartzenfeld, chief financial officerof the University, said, “Our present planstentatively identify early autumn as ourprojected starting date for the proposedplans to begin full-service banking at theBursar’s but we ll be very happy to settle for sometime in 1990.”Although full details have not been re¬vealed, plans call for the Bursar to achieveloaning capacity, provide IRA’s, checkingand savings accounts as well as Christmasclubs. Farther into the future, plans call forthe installation of a drive-through windowbetween the Administration building andJones.When queried upon the impetus for theexpansion, Swartzenfeld replied that, “TheUniversity discovered that the faculty andstudents had a great deal of money that theUniversity wanted so we thought of this inaddition to the tuition increases. Also, re¬search by the Sociology Department hasdispelled our long-range conception thatmost of the students are thieving connivingbastards who aren’t to be trusted. In fact itis only the Business School students whoaren’t to be trusted and, accordingly, theywill be denied privileges at the Bursar's.” S20 for a phone? doubling of rent, free service for UniversitySecurity officers, and forced “communityservice projects” to help cut the U of CHospital System’s current deficit. “There’sno way I could agree to these demands andmake a profit, and they knew it,” assertedAlexopolous.When asked why he thought the Univer¬sity made such demands, he answered,“It’s that Morry guy. He wanted this place,and the University is giving it to him. Eversince he busted the union over in HutchCourt they love him.”“That Morry guy” denies pressuring theUniversity. “I heard that they couldn’treach an agreement, so I placed a bid. Myrecord in being a good tenant for theUniversity speaks for itself,” he said. Or¬loff runs the Morry’s restaurants located inthe U of C Bookstore, Hutchinson Com¬mons, the School of the Art Institute, theFalcoln Inn and on 52nd, 53rd, 54th. 55thand Cornell. He plans to call the newrestaurant “Morry’s 6.” “There’s gettingto be so many that I’ve decided to startnumbering them, just like Stallone does.”Hoping to cash in on its proximity to boththe University Lab School and the RaySchool, “Morry’s 6” will serve food gearedtowards the younger crowd. Opening at 7am. the restaurant will offer a new kind ofbreakfast cereal, to be called “Morry-O’s.”The lunch menu will include old favoritessuch as Jello pudding, peanut butter andjelly, and Twinkies. “Morry’s 6” will alsooffer “Morry Meals,” boxed lunches con¬taining kid-sized pastrami sandwiches andspecial prizes.Many of the Agora’s customers wereshocked over the news, especially afterbeing told what the new restaurant will belike. “I’m shocked,” said a graduate stu¬dent who has been eating there for the lastten years. “I mean, they can't do this. Imight as well start writing my disserta¬tion.”Reactions from the Chicago police of¬ficers who often frequent the restaurantwere just as serious, and slightly moreprofane. “This f***ing University has itsf***ing hand in every f***ing thing, and itf***ing stinks.” said one officer.The Agora management has set up apetition drive to support its fight againstthe University and urges all concernedHyde Parkers to sign it.EDWARDO’SNATURAL PIZZARANT 44 Superstars of Stuffed Pizza”— Chicago Sun-TimesWE DELIVERFast, Courteous Service for Lunch, Dinner,and Late-Night Hours.For Delivery, Pick-Up or to eat in ourDining Room, Call Ahead.241-7960Orders Taken Until 30 Minutes Before Closing TimeSun.-Thurs. 11:00 A.M. to 12:30 A.M. • Fri.-Sat. 11:00 A.M. to 1:30 A.MAlso Featuring Fresh Salads, Pasta, and Light SandwichesEdwardo's in Hyde Park is conveniently located at1321 E. 57th StreetThe Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—7$098 $098O NICE PRICE °from CBS records & tapes3 FOR $10®°includingGrowm Up Blinded By The LightSpirit In The Night /For YouIt s Hard To Be A Saint InThe City JETHRO TULLTHIS WASincluding:Dharma For 1 ELVIS COSTELLO& THE ATTRACTIONSPUNCH THE CLOCKincluding:Everyday I Write The BookThe Greatest Thing/Pills And SoapShipbuilding/The Invisible Man THE CLASHCOMK.IT KOCHincluding:Should I Stay Or Should I Go?Rock The Casbah Overpowered By FunkKnow Your RightsBOZSCAGGSSILK DEGREESincluding:It s Over What Can I Say GeorgiaJump Street Lowdown Lido Shuffle HEARTLittle Queenincluding:Barracuda 'Love Alive/Sylvan SongDream Of The Archer/Kick It Out/Treat Me WellSay Hello/Cry To Me/Go On Cry JETHRO TULLSTAND UPincluding: JourneyEVOLUTIONincluding:Just The Same Way / Lovin .Toucbin. SqueezinLovm You Is Easy Too LateWhen You re Alone (It Ain't Easy)JAMES TAYLORJTincluding:Handy Man/Honey Don’t Leave LAYour Smiling Face /Terra NovaTraffic Jam Dun Fat'dhurt; <£■Tint lleisbcri'Juin Sons of Different MothersFeaturing MEAT LOAFBat Out Of Hellincluding:Heaven Can Wait/For Crying Out LoudBat Out Of Hell/Paradise By The Dashboard LightTwo Out Of Three Ain't BadSimonandGarfunkelBridgeOverTroubledWaterincludingCeciliaEl Condor PasaBye Bye LoveKeepTheCustomerSatisfiedBridge OverTroubledWater BILLY JOEL52" STREETincludingMy LifeBig ShotRosalinda s EyesUntil The NightHonestyStilettoZanzibar CHICAGO’SGREATEST HITSincluding:Just You N' Me/Colour My WorldSaturday InThe Park 25 Or 6To4(I've Been) Searchin So LongWishing You Were Here PI N K FLOY DLledteetion of C /wot-t'iinec -Wo/i,j>including:One Ot These Days Money SheepShine On You Crazy DiamondWish You Were HereAnother Brick In The Wall (Part II)100'S MORE TO CHOOSE FROM1444 E. 57th684-15058—The Chicago Maroon-Friday, April 4. 1986rThe Little Engine that Could The U of C Introducesby Richard AttenboroughIn this community that we call The University ofChicago, we recognize and reward human greatness.Whether it’s a great thespian like Oprah Winfrey or aworld-renowned scholar like Dr. James Petersen, welove to welcome those who have realized the potentialinherent in the human species into our collective home,where we celebrate their achievements. But when welook far and wide for greatness to embrace, we oftenmiss the little examples of greatness right under ournoses.One such example is graduate student and philosopherSakotra (who, like Madonna, needs no last name).Sakotra has kept a low profile since those heady dayswhen he could be seen hunger-striking in front of theAdministration Building by day and drinking at Jimmy’sby night, all in the name of divestment from SouthAfrica. In the interest of providing a role model for thesehero-less times, The Maroon has decided to help returnSakotra to his natural habitat, the spotlight.Everyone knows that Sakotra is big in the inter¬national civil rights movement. However, few realizethat Sakotra got to his position from the springboard ofthe domestic civil rights movement, right there on themarch to Selma. At the beginning of the march, Sakotrawas just another protester; just another person struggl¬ing for racial equality. No one elsesaw his greatness. But along the waya transformation occurred, and hisfellow fighters for equality began torecognize his superiority. Their firstclue occurred on that fateful day,after provisions had run out, whenSakotra fed the masses with a coupleof cans of Starkist and some loaves ofWonder bread.His popularity greatly increasedwhen he changed his fellow trave¬lers’ water into Ripple. In 1968. Sak¬otra’s stature in the civil rightsmovement achieved its full measurewhen Martin Luther King, Jr., diedin his arms.Since then Sakotra has used hisposition to defend the rights of opp¬ressed peoples everywhere. He wasinstrumental in the defense of theChicago Seven and the Indianapolis500. He tried to free Northern Irelandfrom the phallocentric tyranny of thebourgeois imperialistic British opp¬ressors through his strongestweapon, the publicity of the hunger strike. However, his thunder was stolen, and his effortswere ruined when Bobby Sands died before he could. Inthe face of this setback, Sakotra recaptured the publicimagination by freeing Galileo from his Church-imposedconfinement in hell and re-instating him to grace.Sakotra’s career extends much farther back than theserecent events. He is credited, for example, with launch¬ing Gandhi’s career when, while visiting his pal Moh¬andas in South Africa, he inadvertently flicked ashesfrom his ever-present cigarette onto the Mahatma’spassbook. This incident gave Mohandas the idea thatcatapulted him to stardom, as he went on to burn many apassbook in South Africa. Incidentally, Sakotra claimsthat Gandhi also died in his arms, but this claim is muchdisputed.Another dispute centers around the legend that it wasSakotra, not St. Veronica, who wiped Christ’s brow.Arnold Toynbee devoted a large section of his majorwork, A Study of Sakotra, to disproving this legend. Thehistorical community largely disagrees with Toynbee onthis point; instead, it accepts the argument of J.G.A.Pocock, who said that since Sakotra produced Christthrough the Immaculate Conception, he was probablyclose enough to Christ to wipe his brow.Such sentiments have earned Sakotra praise aroundthe world. But his strongest praise is also his oldestpraise. As the first chapter of Genesis tells us, “In thebeginning there was Sakotra. And God looked on Sakotraand found that Sakotra was very good.”Sakotra still is. The RegensteinGold CardFor Its Customersby Jul E. BiggeThe University Library system announced the in¬troduction of the Regenstein Gold Card to all Universitystudents and faculty yesterday at a press conference.The credit card will allow holders access to Regensteinand Crerar Libraries twenty-four hours a day. Gold Cardmembers will also be able to use their cards to chargetheir photocopies, library fines, and most importantlywill have a tab at Club Reg.For those who cannot afford a gold card, the Librariesalso offer a green card that will allow around the clockaccess to the Regenstein Library only. Student andfaculty I.D. holders can obtain these cards for a nominalfee at the Bursar's Office.Dean of Students Herman Sinaiko pointed out that“because several students have complained to me thatsixteen and a half hours a day just aren't enough, we(the administration) looked for and found a way to makestaying open twenty-four hours a day economicallyfeasable.” The fact that almost all of the student bodypasses through its doors at least once a day gave theRegenstein business manager a more or less captiveaudience and market.The University attempts to retain this audiencethrough the clearly most popular features of a Regen¬stein credit card membership, library access twenty-four hours a day and standing invitation to Club Reg.Members of the Club can use the locker and showerfacilities to freshen up in the morning after an all-nighter. In addition, any member needing to take a napcan rent out three lockers to sleep in on an hourly basis,with wake-up calls provided upon request.Club Reg also features a new two-hundred seat theaterwhich shows films continuously throughout the day Thevenue shows recent released along with U of C type filmssuch as Bedazzled. My Tutor, Revenge of the Nerds,Escape from Hyde Park, Taxi Driver, and course thatclassic night in Hell- After Hours.Sokova ’ewes o ncyDer,* to 3D*c some cotton at nts oeocnsoe Evanston homeU of C Climbers Surmount the Regenstein Barrierby Blyth Tunicliff Everest, McKinley, K-2, Fugi...and then there wasCobb. Hordes of students are looming and peering off thetops of buildings as they give vent to frustrations byclimbing walls at the U of C.An avid climber describes his motivation for climbingwalls. He believes that “walls symbolically representconfines which stifle individual creativity and free¬dom... Walls express my anxieties and inhibitions.. )WhenI make it to the top I receive a surge of energy and asense of liberty.” He added that the feeling was similarto "a spiritual reawakening.”Another climber notes, “I just get. like, pissed off atthe world so I go climb a wall.”The activity has attracted a cult following whichcollects and propagates legends about the greatestclimbers. “Rhythm is the mark of a truly greatclimber,” noted one member. Some climbers create thisrhythm through an inner sense of peace while others relyon the Samba.One of the greatest climbers was a student whomanaged to scale the walls of Crerar without beingcaught by one of the security guards and without relyingon the use of plastic plunger suction cups. “He scaledthat wall with the grace of a lizard.” noted one climber.The best climbers realize that balance is essential.Unlike the lizard, humans must keep their body weightas directly over the feet as possible. Climbers keep threepoints of contact with the building: 2 hands and a foot, 2feet and a hand, 2 elbows and a knee, etcetera. While climbing up is not always difficult, climbingdown “is tough, " says one climber. “You can’t see holdsfrom above, and the plastic plunger suction cups kind ofget in the way.”Yet climbing, says one former climber, “is a greaterexercise of judgement than it is of physical endurance.”This student made the unfortunate decision to climbPresident Gray’s house. “She caught me and paddledmy behind but good. ”Yet climbing challenges the endurance of many —strong or weak. Buildings such as the Reg and Crerarrequire “real athletes.” says one flabby climber. Build¬ings such as Classics and Ryerson simply require theability to hike up a few flights of stairs.There is a subclass of climbers whom the real clim¬bers simply sneer at. These are the enterprising soulswho find ways of getting on top of buildings without anyreal climbing. These daring people prefer more pedes¬trian ways of scaling buildings such as taking theelevator to the top floor and then going out a door orwindow. Sometimes they might even attempt using a fireescape. What they all have in common is a butter knifethey use to jimmy locks that bar them from their goal.But as climbers real or imagined, they all know thatsense of having conquered an unconquerable goal. Toclimb the Reg is to defeat the Reg. Remember though,the next time you walk through the Quads, especially atnight, there may be someone above you peering. Some¬one who’s really weird.The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—9Faculty Senateby Hopefull E. TransferringProfessor Richard Taub asserted that it is not enoughfor students to read about the Hobbesian State of Naturein class, they must feel what they are learning about inorder to be able to understand it. In an effort to increasestudent awareness of the society they live in, Dean of theCollege Donald Levine announced yesterday newchanges in the Core which will revolve mainly aroundthe institution of labs next year in the Social ScienceDivision.The Committee of the Core proclaims the College as aplace where the “Not only do you learn about theCommon Core, but you live it.” Their report suggests amandatory lab for the Social Science Core. The collegewould close off the gates tothe quadrangles, placetwenty-five predatorial animals such as lions and tigersin the quads, fill the Botany Pond with pirahna, and thenhave the University’s helicopter airlift a section offreshmen into this specially created “state of nature.”The students would be equipped with only knives and theclothes on their backs, and then told to “rough it,” forthe next seven days.Taub pointed out that, “If the students are smart, theywill find that Rousseau’s social contract really doeswork. Unless you are some kind of Shcwartzenegger, youaren’t going to survive out on the quads very longwithout some help from your classmates.” Since thephilosophers Hobbes and Rousseau form the very foun¬dation of the Social Science Common Core, it is essentialthat the freshmen master these works before they canmove on. Chemistry Professor Robert Gomer remarkedthat, “this is better than ‘weeding out,’ this is survival ofthe fittest.” Instead of students failing and then becom¬ing a statistic in our drop-out ledger, they will all receiveI’s, giving their parents some solace until they haverecovered from the shock a year later, when the I s willchange to W’s.History Professor Karl Weintraub expressed hope thatthe new labs will allow his Western Civilization classes tocover more ground. Not only vfcill the students have amastery of the great philosophers, but they will alsohave a deep understanding of Thucydides and Mach-iavelli at the start of the course. “By negotiating withothers on the quads, I think that the students will have adeep understanding that the strong will do whatever theywant, ‘while the weak do what they must.’ ”Dissenters to the plan expressed concern over poorlyphysically equipped students in the heated debate overthe issue before the Faculty Senate’s vote. Oppositionleader Katie Nash noted that although many studentsenter the college with four years of physics and math,probably none of them have had more than one year ofphysical education. She further noted that “this will putour admissions office at a severe disadvantage in theapplications process, as they will not only be looking forapplicants who can survive Social Science labs, but theywill also have to look for students with the four years ofmath and gym.”But Dean of Admissions Dan Hall countered with thefact that “students nowadays are more health consciousthan they used to be. Besides, most Chicago studentsdon’t start out being out of shape. Rather, the longer Votes in Favor of Social Serene Labsstudents are here, the more time they spend in a library,and the more out of shape they get.” But he offered as aprecaution that as many freshmen as possible be takenthrough this lab before winter quarter, when the so-called “freshmen fifteen” sets in.Initial student reaction to the plan was mixed. SeniorTubby McPherson commented that “If that was arequirement to pass, I never would have applied. Butthen again you’re talking to someone who flunked gymhere five times.” Freshman Bunny Brixton thought thatthe plan was a great idea, and that it would weed out allthe nerds without bods. “After all, everyone knows thatthe U of C is not the place to get an Mrs. Degree. Thiswill help to narrow down the field, and will give theschool a better reputation, thereby bringing in more andmore hunks.”Hanna Gray proudly cited that the University ofChicago, which currently is ranked fifth in terms of itsstudent mortality rate, would probably shoot past Corn¬ell and the other Ivies to first place in the first year oftheir plan. In a recent interview with The Maroon, shebeamed, “I am proud of the fact that we are in the Iviesleague in terms of academics, tuition, and now studentmortality.”After learning of Chicago’s bold new bid for suprem¬acy over the Ivies, Harvard president V.E. Rycon- servative had no comment. Penn President Hard LeeSpeaking had no comment. Upon announcement of theplan, film star Pee Wee Herman returned his unusedapplication to Chicago.While the decision to go ahead with this revamping ofthe Common Core is controversial, it will apparentlyaccomplish what its prospers intented it to do. PresidentGray suggested that one shouldn’t just look at the up ordownside of the proposal, but rather the plan should beexamined as a unit. “The higher amount of enteringfreshmen should offset the increased student mortalityrate in social science lab. Those surviving lab will bestudents who have mastered the subject as predicted bythe SAT’s. Thus our average SAT scores will increase,attracting more applicants, which will in turn offset thedecrease in the number of students applying because ofthe Core’s vigorous physical requirements.President Gray further speculated that the characterof the school who would not signifgantly change, “just afew more Ivy types.” But then again,” oppositionmember Adam Greene commented, “if we expand toomuch, the Regenstein Library will cease to be the homeof the unknown geek. As Ivy League frat boys playlacrosse outside, fewer and fewer geeks will be inside,and that’s bad for everyone.”To the right one studentleader attempting toconvince a group to joinin a social contract. The University's newcommon core socialscience labs putsfreshmen in the Hobbe¬sian State of Nature. Tothe left, one freshmanhasn't quite graspedthat in nature, the weakdo what they can whilethe strong do what theymust.Security Finds Secret Graduate Residence on B-Leveltowards Chicago. The administration anticipated a de¬crease in federally funded grants, University spokesmanJonathan Kleinbard said, “and so we took a series ofpreventative measures to combat the upcoming crisis.”But Kleinbard refused to either confirm or deny theexistence of the Project.The only service of food, according to several graduatestudents, was Morry’s. “Somebody from the adminis¬tration building would come over at twelve and six p.m.every day to take our orders,” remembered grad studentReal E. Smart. “Then on weekends, they would let ushave stuffed pizza and Harold’s chicken. Between thecombination of Morry’s, non-flat pizza, and greasychicken,” another student recalled, “I lost touch with thereal world.”A graduate from Wellesley College recalled that afterhaving been on B-Level for a week, she’d almost totallyforgotten that flat and greasy pizza really existed, andthat the taste of a double chocolate cone from Emac andBolio’s had become just a distant memory.The head of the project, Professor I. M. Strange,dismissed charges that students were being brainwashedand then held against their will as “ludicrous.” He addedthat graduate students entering Chicago knew what theywere in for, before they came. As for the charge thatstudents were duped into the so-called Coney IslandProject, Strange declared that students should haveknown that “something more than just TA’ing a classwas expected of them, when this normally ‘cheap’university offered them a full ride fellowship.”Although the University has not confirmed that theConey Island Project exists, indications are that re¬search being conducted by the graduate students is beingdone for the Department of Defense, the first suchresearch for them since the Manhattan Project in theforties. The research focuses in on a drug developed atthe Pritzker School of Medicine called neop-seudostudirum-4.0. This drug first surfaced in a scandalinvolving the University’s Food Service last month.Reportedly the drug raised the intelligence of laboratoryanimals by thirty percent, although it has the un¬fortunate side effect of reducing bicep size, knowncommonly as the Rnvkn Syndrome.by Total E. PaelUniversity of Chicago security stumbled upon fiftygraduate students conducting research in Regenstein’sB-Level last night, while searching for a group ofBusiness School students and a keg of beer that they hadbrought into the library. The students were allegedlybrainwashed and then forced to work on basic researchfor the Pentagon in the most squalid of conditions. One student was found sleeping on a mattress composedcompletely of greasy Wonder Bread from Harold’sChicken Shack, and another student just kept repeating“Domino’s Delivers” over and over again while typingdata into a terminal. Many students had been workingthere non-stop for three years and living in bunksconverted from lockers under a special program in¬itiated by the University.The secret program, known only as the “Coney IslandProject,” was instituted by the administration years agoin an early bid to woo more Defense Department dollarsThe Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, i960 These were among a group of fifty graduate students found yesterday m Reqenstems nReg Found Harboring Seething Cauldrons of LustThese Northwestern coeds recently road tripped down to Regenstem's 3rd Floor to scope out some U of C malesby Buffe E. and Bif E. BornlIt’s spring quarter and you just can’t find any motiva¬tion to go to the library, right? Well cheer up, geekbreath because here’s a U of C tradition that will notonly get you to the library, but will get those vital juicessquelching. That’s right we’re talking about the legend¬ary U of C “Library Love.” As experienced initiates intothe joys and follies of library sex we are here to take youon a tour of sexual possibilities throughout the entirelibrary system. That is to say, the best places to fuck.And for the unfortunate among you, you’ll find out thebest place to station yourself to at least get a glimpse ofwhat you’re not getting.There are seven major libraries in the Universitysystem and it presents a host of possibilities to thesexually adventurous. Most people think only of thestacks of Regenstein when they think of library sex butthe beast with two backs is everywhere.There are a few basic rules to remember. The besttime is late at night when the libraries are leastpopulated. Its probably not a good idea to go formarathon sessions as it greatly increases your chancesof getting caught and embarrassed. Remember librarysex is generally a quickie. Also don’t involve largegroups. Keep numbers down. Try not to make a lot ofnoise. Noise will either irritate the hard core studycrowd, offend the uptight, or attract the degenerate. So ifeither one of you is a moaner, try to muffle it. Finally,remember the idea is not to get caught. The wholevicarious thrill rests on getting away with somethingyou’re not supposed to be doing.We’ll start our tour across the Midway, with the twolibraries that most undergrads are not even aware of.The Law Library is not the best place to have sex, but ithas some interesting possibilities. The stacks there likeRegenstein offer some isolation and have a few moredead ends and dark corners where furtive coitus can becarried on. For those of you who are into that sort ofthing, the bathrooms in the stacks are very deserted lateThe University's hygene consciousness has led it to check for used prophilacticsby Adriano Maureen McCorneyA team of six graduate students from the MidwayInstitute of Pre-Nouveau Quasi Post-Impressionist(IPNQPI) Interpretive Art recently concluded theirweek-long study of sculptures on the University ofChicago Campus.The team, comprised of Leo Heidrich-Bornislov, SirAdrian O’Toole, Pedro Ramirez Juan Vasquez, Brun-hilda Jones, Bu Hao Kan and Q. Spritz, systematicallyanalyzed prominent pieces of 3-D art. The IPNQPImethod stresses the feel-the-mood approach to art anal¬ysis and appreciation. “The fact is,” Vasquez explained,“any one can grasp the sublime depths the artist meantto transmit if he/she will only place him/herself in thecorrect mental attitude to intercept the waves of emotionemitted by the work.”“Using their method, the crew first studied the revolv¬ing obelisk in front of the Brain Research building andreached the conclusion that it was a 104 magnificationstudy of an Oreo cookie after being lightly tapped by asledgehammer and ice pick. “The power in this simpleyet universally relevant representation,” Jones said, “isjust unbelievable...The cookie, a symbol of the innocenceof tender childhood..brutally, inhumanly crushed by theoverbearing tyranny of adults intent on crushing thesocial rebellion manifested by eating the cream first.”The team found it extremely significant that this workbe found in close proximity with “...a smaller, duller,spheroid of Paleolithic pre-pagan darkness,” as O’Tooleparaphrased the description of a work which the gradsfeel radiates the image of uncontrollable paranoia.“When one looks at this object, one’s mind extracts acomplex and frightening picture — one sees an un¬numbered eight ball, a bowling ball sans holes, perfectcondensations of a world gone awry.” They feel that theintensity of this feeling is such that the viewer can easilybecome convinced his world is crumbling and the piece, at night, and present an interesting kinky alternative tothe stand up quickie. Forget about the main study areasunless you are a real exhibitionist. However if you likeshowing off your technique or your equipment, this areais perfect because people on the street have a clear viewthrough the windows.Next perhaps the least known library is the SocialServices Administration library. Its very small andoffers absolutely no opportunity for fun and games. Ifyou’re willing to try it there, you might as well bangaway on one of the tables at Harper. We think that if thislibrary had more places for sex, more people would go toit.The newest library is Crerar, and you would think thatthey designed it specifically so people couldn’t fuck in it.All the rooms are glass and there are no isolated spots atall. But the inventive among you can frustrate their littlescheme to repress expressions of sexuality by going intothe basement stacks where the stacks themselves can bemoved to provide excellent cover for sexual activity.This is a great place to play games, our favorite is hidethe banana. A warning though, it sometimes getscrowded down there so be careful when moving thedividers because you might be uncovering someone. Andremember no moaning!Jones Chemistry library like the SSA provides mini¬mal cover for sex. The stacks are a tiny area thatprovide very little cover. You’ll have to settle for playingfootsie under the table although the brave among youmight try for a little digital manipulation. The tablesoffer some cover and squeezing the weasel or a littlefinger dipping is better than nothing.Ekhart might seem like Jones to offer no possibilitiesfor a good time, but it actually offers one of the safestyet most vicariously dangerous places to have sex in thelibraries. On the west side of the library on the firstfloor, the stacks extend behind the wall that is behind thecirculation desk. In this area it is usually pitch black,and makes an excellent place for some serious boffing,while one of the finest on campus, might even present apsychological health hazard.They found the sculpture in front of Pick Hall to be anadmirably sterotypic portrayal of the core of fraternitylife. “The highest piece, a curved hook, is a simple yetauthentic construct of a bottle opener which creates, in asingle moment, the true essence of the fraternal spirit.”They felt this one piece of the triad to be complete in andof itself, but that the lower extensions, while non-essential, come together in a distint point, adding theadditional character of the mystical fraternal handclasp.“This piece is a monument to an essence of life whichcharacterises almost any campus but this one,” Spritzsaid.The committee reviewed only one indoor work, thecelebrated if ignominious bust of the notable Silas B.Cobb in the Hall of the same name. Vasquez described itas a classic of traditional honorary portrayal. He foundhimself drawn to the clear indistinction of the form, anduplifted by the rigid truth of the minimal ornamentation.“One can truly understand from this piece just what kindof a man Cobb was and how the artist felt compelled toreveal such a man’s inner nature.” The entire groupagreed that the statue’s position was an distinctiveachievement in taste.Of course the team could not resist the challenge ofinterpreting the multi-faceted Crerar work. Upon reach¬ing the building, the team started forward, gasping inadmiration. Heidrich-Bornislov was most impressed bythe steel pieces. He found their symmetry and change ofdirection a simple yet explicit view of the continuity ofdevelopment in today’s high-technology society. “Itmoves but yet it is well-constrained," he explained.Spritz felt the parallelism of the opposing steel rails to bethe most notable feature of the work. “You can easilysee that, although they are structurally parallel, theenergy of each side forms an antiparallel conversion.”The team found the only negative aspect to be the threebicycles chained to the work. The now apparent misun¬derstanding was quickly rectified, but unfortunately theteam, faced with time constraints, politely declined toenter the Crerar building. even during daytime. Anyone can of course walk in onyou, but that is part of the vicarious thrill. But you'reright behind the circulation desk so we can’t stressenough no moaning! Something Jones and Ekhart havein common is that when the libraries are open, so are therest of the building, so if you’re every wanted to playtunnel and train on your professors desk, this is yourchance. Make sure you leave a big wet stain just for fun.Harper at first glance would seem to have absolutelyno places for burying some beef, but in fact it hasseveral very good places. In the smoking area of Harperin the west tower is a conference room with no windowsthat provides complete seclusion. But an even betterplace is in the East tower on the fifth and sixth floor. Onthese floors is a large lobby area with a couch. At night,its deserted and the couches allow you to really bounceaway. A fun bit of voyeurism is to take the elevator upthe fifth floor or sixth floor and suprise copulatingcouples. We have on several occasions, and boy is it fun!This leaves the grandaddy of library sex, the Reg.Opportunities abound here, so sex is the stacks is passee.For the truly adventurous, try a study carroll. Wesuggest the ones in a line. But as always, no moaning. B-level is pretty deserted so if you need a lot of room forwriggling and yelling when performing heat seekingmissle exercises, this is the place for you.The absolute hippest place right now to have sex inReg is in the faculty studies part of the building on theeast side. Ignore all the no admittance signs and go rightin. The place is usually deserted at night and there areall kinds of open rooms and lounges just ripe forexpeditions. Right now this is the place on campus forrunning down the old mousehole so perk up that saggingsex life and go pound some nails.Don’t be afraid to experiment and try- new places. Thelibraries are generally only good at night. But there arelots of buildings on campus, and it is your right to havesex in them. After all, most of the faculty do.The Medici DeliversThis Time It’s a Boy!The term “We Deliver” was given new meaning thisWednesday night when Mrs. Vira Thompson gave birthto three boys in a back booth of the Medici on 57threstaurant.According to her husband, Mrs. Thompson was not duefor another three weeks. While in the middle of her firstslice of pepperoni pizza, she began experiencing stomachpains. “My wife usually gets gas when she eats pep¬peroni, so we didn't think anything of it,” said Mr.Thompson.It was a bu$boy who first noticed that something waswrong. “I saw some water on the floor, and thought thatshe had spilled her water glass, but then I rememberedthat she didn’t have any water,” stated Ty Williams, aKenwood Academy student.Williams notified the Thompson’s waiter, Bill Vaughn,that something was up. By the time Vaughn got to thetable, Mrs. Thompson knew that it was more than justpepperoni pains. She requested transport to the nearesthospital, but Vaughn, a third-year Biology major andavid fan of the “Emergency” repeats on Channel 32,knew that there wasn’t enough time.Quickly busing the table, Vaughn laid Mrs. Thompsondown, while Williams called the fire department.Vaughn’s co-workers screened off the booth with oldtablecloths, enabling the other patrons to continue theirmeals undisturbed. The paramedics quickly arrivec onthe scene, but not before Vaughn had successfullydelivered the first boy. “I was pretty scared.” he said,“but I kept thinking to myself how great this was goingto look on my med school applications.” Vaughn wasassisted by Leo Boyd, the head cook.The two other boys were delivered by the paramedics,who then rushed the mother and children to Wyler Lying-In Hospital. All are reported to be doing fine.Dick Johnson, owner and manager of the restaurant,recalled to the incident with pride, saying, “I always liketo hire U of C students because you never know whensomething like this is going to happen. " Then Joh isonadded, “Domino’s Pizza might deliver while you wait,but here at the Medici, we deliver if you can’t.”The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—11Mystical Powers of the OreoGrav’s Administration lives in Watergate ScandalBy Total E. RadUncompromising Positions is a living con¬tradiction both on and off the screen. Normally,remakes like this one play it safe by hiring thesame type of director and cast as the original, butthis remake of All the President’s Men doesn’t.Instead it looks like it’s going for a double steal,hiring both comedy director Sydney Pollack and acast of unknowns from the University of Chicago,a college that doesn’t even have a theater de¬partment. But like the double steal, the filmsurprises on the strength of the individual players,and with newcomers Hanna Gray and WayneBooth leading the way, the reality never lets down.The plot of the film doesn’t deviate much fromthe original picture, which in turn didn’t deviate alot from its original. Five members of the Univer¬sity Administration play the plumbers almost alltoo well, bungling in a Keystone Cops fashion thebugging of the Democratic Headquarters in theWatergate Hotel. It is the cover-up of this messthat leads investigators eventually to PresidentNixon (Hanna Gray) himself. It is this cover thatthe Washington Post blows off the story.Bill Florida and Rick Szesny play their roles asThe Post’s Woodward and Bernstein with a re¬freshingly real quality. After being pulled off thePentagon beat, where they were scurrilouslytracking down a ninety-two dollar toilet seat, thetwo are sucked into the whirlpool of an ever-widening circle of involvement, a spiral that leadsdirectly to the President.Theda Skocpol plays the disgruntled insidernamed Deep Throat whose conscience turns on herafter losing an internal administration battle. Withher involvement, the pair is led past the plumbersto the Committee to Re-Elect, and its formidableguardian, H.R. Haldeman, played by UniversityNews and Information EKrector Jonathan Klein-bard. He runs interference for the big boys up¬stairs, until he too is implicated by Deep Throat.Another fine actor is “Dandy” Don Levine whoas G. Gordon Liddy gets a chance to display hisAikedo training, pitting mind over matter when heidly holds his hand over a lighter while talking toSpeaker Tip O’Neill (Dr. Melnichek). FormerDean of the College Wayne Booth also puts on afine show as former Vice President Spiro Agnew,who rather ironically is seen at breakfast everyday offering advice to his wife about what “hewould do in Dick’s place,” as the camera circlesthe Agnew’s breakfast table upon which lies acopy of The Post, a pitcher of milk and a 1040form. Freshman English major Trish Handles isespecially engaging as Agnew’s country-bred wife. She listens to Spiro with a patronizing ear, andafter conferring with Patricia Nixon (CharlesGray) decides to write everything down for afuture book.While it is often the case that the quality actingof the supporting cast allows the principles toshine, in this case their ensemble acting outlastsand outdistances in one’s memory the work of theprincipals. Florida and Szesny just aren’t as en¬gaging as Redord and Hoffman were in the origi¬nal of AH the President’s Men. While certainlythey prove that they are quite naive enough, theyare too naive, being drawn along by occasionalconfessions by Deep Throat into a cesspool olpolitics that they almost drown in. In the end, it istheir naivete that puts their performances straightdown the proverbial tubes. They prove to be asmoralistic as their roles, leaving the audience withthe feeling that the pair, like the WashingtonScandal, just cannot be real.As if to undercut the heavy material that thefilm is dealing with, flowing beneath every seriousmoment in the film is an undercurrent of comicrelief that the female part of the cast play. Theirinterplay seems to bring the earthshaking actionsof their male counterparts down to earth. One wonders how Henry Kissinger (Nathan Tarcov),ever got the idea of “brinksmanship,” as heattempts the rudiments of the English languageunder the tutelage of Pat Nixon; the scene isfurther comically complicated by the entrance ofTed Kennedy (Charles Lipson) with his Boston“Brahmin” accent. The Oval Office footballscrimmage arranged by Vice-President GeraldFord (Charles O’Connell), his wife, and the Nix¬ons, is a study in domestic politics as the four hurlthe hot potato of Ralph Nader away from them¬selves ending up in a free-for-all, when suddenlyHanna Gray grabs the football and shouts “caveatempor!”At first glance, it looks like Pollack has hit aslump after the rousing successes of Tootsie andOut of Africa. But what saves this film is theperceived weak point in the production, the acting.This cast of unknowns from the University Ad¬ministration acting company work with a preci¬sion that only comes with years of fending offstudents seeking divestment or explanations fortuition increases. The idealism embodied by thepublic and student protesters is perfectly foiled bythe businesslike efficiency of the Gray adminis¬tration.Hanna Gray herself is outstanding as the ringleader of this group, reversing sex roles with herhusband. At first it seems like Pollack is pullingthe Tootsie rabbit out of his hat again, but he doesso because of the tremendous personal magnetismof Hanna Gray. Her enormous screen presencepractically eliminates the need for supportingactors, and diffuses almost all of the on-screencrisis before they reach a critical level. Bringingher into the role of Nixon is the biggest coup sinceRonald Reagan ascended to the presidency.It is the personal magnetism of Gray and thefine ensemble acting of the University Adminis¬tration that saves this film from becoming justanother film about the lure of power. InsteadUncompromising Positions becomes a fine filmabout doing what one has to do, about staking outa position and damning the consequences to stickby it. It is this quality , whether the position isright or wrong, that gives the film a sense ofnobility. By focusing in on the leaders, the propor¬tions of the tragedy are reduced to a poor judg¬ment rather than a wholesale selling out of thepublic’s faith. Paradoxically, unlike the characterin Uncompromising Positions, Pollack has gam¬bled by taking a new approach to somethingapparently set in stone by All the President’sMen; now if only his characters would take hislead.SCHOOL OFMUSIC % DANCEMusic and DancePiano For AdultsViolin BalletViola Modern DanceCello Dance ExerciseClarinet For ChildrenFlute Creative DanceSaxophone BalletRecorder PointeA Hyde Park Institution ?or Oier 25 years288-35001438 East 57th Street Ctacofate SoupC4e£t»0uj Saiuitday Itujki 10 PM. it WUhiojldTlufi WeekTHE SEVEN MEMBERS OF THE MOILA FAMILYPLAYING SOUTH AFRICAN MUSICHat (Uiria - 25' Patbm - 50*Ai HitM Hqum, 5715 S. IUmuKciwh Au&£m bdsniaimai • Me C«w» Change12—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986- IBudget=car andtruck rentalU.C. STUDENTS,FACULTY, STAFFRENT FOR LESS...Now through April 30, 1986, if you pick up your car after noon on Monday and return itanytime before noon on Friday you can rent a 1985 VW Golf or similar size car for only$19.95 per day.Budget lives up to its name with this midweek rate and unlimited mileage. Gas, taxes andoptional coverage are additional. Car must be returned to renting location. Offer subject toavailability. Offer good at 7234 Stony Island location only.Ask about our low rates on daily and weekend rentals from economy to luxury type cars.Serving Hyde Park & South Shore7234 S. Stony IslandBring in this ad or University ID attime of rental to get reduced rate. Car St TruckRental PcoAAW? «CMtfai n... an OPEN HOUSEmet ★Answers tothe Nov. 1985 exam★ Drawing for free7/i tuition coupons★RefreshmentsChicago LoopOak LawnO’Hare AreaOakbrook April 8 5:45 p.m.April 17 6:30 p.m.April 29 6:30 p.m.May 1 6:30 p.m.Call for information and reservations:782-5170conviser-millerSPECIAL OPENHOUSE BONUS. $50.00cDari IreviewThose who enroll in the Conviser-Miller CPA Review atthe Open House with a $50 deposit will receive anadditional $50 diaconnt off the Early Enrollmenttuition.EYEGLASSESOUR REGULAR PRICE• COMPLETEsingle visiondesigner glasses$3375Offer expires 4/11/86Contacts & SpecsUnlimitedGOLD COAST1051N. Rush St.(At State/Cedar/Rush,above Solomon Cooper Drugs)642-EYES CHICAGO3144 N. Broadway880-5400 CONTACTLENSESOUR REGULAR PRICE30 day extendedwear lenses$24’5SOF IA! M E AM) BA1 S( II AM)I.OMBOMA . PROFESSION AL FEE\l)|)I I ION \l. KFQl IRFI).Offer expires 4/11/86Contact LensesUnlimitedEVANSTON1724 Sherman Ave.864-4441 CHICAGO3144 N. Broadway880-5400 GOLD COAST1051 N. Rush St.(At Stole/Cedor/Rasi,above Solomon Cooper Drags'642-EYES aThe Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4. 1986—13^cHFTlTizza^FowF^rdinizza with new sauce andago, mozzarella andza , four grain honeyFour grainjioney\w sauce a rusteeseStufTedici 1n pizza w(asiago, md pizza , /<i Pizza • Four gvith new sauce a, mozzarella andpizza , four grain hoFour grain honeyella andi honey cney crustthree cheenesan) • S• MediciJuLzza wilhWeiAi^smice and three che.YOU DECIDE!.A.fter having sold 508,141 pan pizzas since 1975, we createdsomething new and wonderhil—a four grain honey crust. We nowoffer three different types of pan pizza—□ A new version of our classic pan pizza, featured in Hyde Parkfor over 15 years!□ Our brand new stuffed pizza made with a four grain dough andthree cheeses—asiago, mozzarella and parmesan!□ Our regular pan pizza made as a four-grain honey crust pizza!We want to know which YOU think is our best. Please stop in,and try our pizzas. We will be taking ballots from every customer!So come in and. . .LET YOUR TASTE DECIDE!ft 1450 East 57th Street in Hyde Park Phone: 667*7394 A14—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986Gidon Kremer: "The World’s Greatest Violinist”...Herbert von KarajanAT ORCHESTRA HALLMONDAY, APRIL 28, 7:30 p.m*Works performed by Mr. Kremer and the Lockenhaus musicians:Brahms, Mozart, Webern, Nahler and Schnittke (Chicago Premiere)TICKETS: 40.00 to *40.00STUDENTS: *7.50To charge, call C-H-A-M-B-E-R*Free Pre-concert lecture at 6:30 p.m.CHAMBER MUSIC CHICAGO410 S. Michigan, #462 • 663-1628 university of Chicago Department of MedicineCENTER FOR CLINICAL MEDICAL ETHICSPresents A Lecture OnHepatomas, Hope, and HMO'S:who Should Pay for Liver Transplantation?Delivered ByEDMUND O. PELLEGRINO, M.D.Director, Kennedy institute of BioethicsProfessor of Medicine, Georgetown universitySchool of MedicineTuesday, April 811:30 A.M.Billings Hospital, Room P-117FREE TO THE PUBLICFOREMOS11531 East Hyde Park Blvd 955-5660CHATEAU GLORIAT982 BORDEAUX14 991 “• J J 750 ML GERMAN SPATLESEWINES5»99 750 MLCHATEAU LACROIX-ST. MICHAEL1982 BORDEAUX6.99 DOMAINE ST. GEORGECHARDONNAY5 b 99 750 MLHYDE PARK’S LARGEST IMPORTED BEER DEPARTMENT!CARTA BLANCA |6-12oz.N.R. BOTTLES P3,29 A MOLSONl 6-12 oz. N.R. BOTTLESh 319GROLSCH \6-12 oz. N.R. BOTTLESO QQ° ^ JQNE DEI # KLOSTER PILSNER6-12 oz. BOTTLES2 99.IVER) ^ 77| SALE DA TES APRIL 3 TO APRIL 9STORE HOURS: Mon.-Thurs. 9-11, Fri. & Sat. 9-12. Sunday 12 Noon-10— We Accept Visa & Mastercard —Must be 21 yrs. of age We reserve the right to limit quantitiesPositive I D, required and correct printing errors.Join the FOREMOST' Wine & Imported Beer Society .,.SAVE ON FINE WINES A IMPORTED BEERSNON-SALE ITEMS ONLY IBM PC, IBM XT, Compag Portable Zenith &Compag DeskPro Owners“WHA T IF...HP Offered You ItsPowerful Vectra PC and Money Back?Now for a limited time, Hewlett-Packard will!When you trade-in your IBM PC, IBM PC/XT,Compaq Portable, or Compaq Deskpro computerand upgrade to the powerful Vectra PersonalComputer, HP will give you up to $1000 back*But there’s more...The Vectra PC is fully IBM PC/ATcompatible. And it runs thousands ofprograms up to 30% faster And it takesup 30% less desk space.For more Informationcontact the MicroComputer DistributionCenter at 962-6086The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—15Library students used as brain guinea pigsBy Manny E. SchevitzThe Department of molecular geneticsand cell biology has expanded into once-vacant B-level Regenstein.Needing more research space, the de¬partment designated B-level Regenstein asthe site of its new DNA research lab.Once a haven for devoted map-readersand other sociable types, B-level Reg isnow affiliated with the Enrico Fermi In¬stitute as a research wing studying DNAmutation in university-age adults.Research presently focuses on possibleDNA-toxicity inherent in certain elementsof U of C life, stated David Oxtoby, profes¬sor of chemistry and director of theproject. Elements now under scrutiny in¬clude studying in the basement of Crerar,the Midway Review, and the infamous“Maroon Burger’’ served at Pierce dininghall.Oxtoby is having a few problems with thestudy. “The students are reluctant to eatmore Maroon Burgers, and I can’t say Iblame them. I took a burger home to study,but my son got a hold of it and is now usingit as a hockey puck.”Other faculty members are excited at theprospect of working on the project. MichaelMelnichak. director of undergraduatechemistry labs stated, “I always enjoyworking with the undergraduates in the labs, as my demeanor will attest to, butmutating, ah. researching graduates pro- James Cronin, professor of physics andmises to be a worthwhile endeavor.” fellow project researcher commented. “1'This woman’s hot to check out the brain drug usually study quarks and mesons and otherteeny particles, so studying humans foronce should be really fun. If we couldscientifically establish Maroon Burgers asmutagenic, we’d be doing those poor kidswith meal contracts a big favor. Whoknows, this Mutagenic Maroon Burgersthing might even win me another Nobel."The project is the brainchild of Univer¬sity VP for Research Walter Massey.“While our primary goal is the research ofgenetic structure and durability, we alsowant to involve our graduate students inour research. What better way is therethan to use them as guinea pigs, er, thetopics of research?” he noted.Students have mixed reactions towardthe project. One graduate student involvedin the program as a subject said he hasnoticed some minor side-effects from theproject. “I’ve been sleepwalking lately,and yesterday around 11:30 pm I had thissudden urge to break-dance at the corner ofCottage Grove and 48th Street. Otherwise, Ifeel OK.”Another student, an undergraduate, ex¬pressed skepticism regarding the project.“I can’t believe these shmendricks aredoing a study to see if the crap they serveat Pierce is toxic. Anybody who has eatenthere for a quarter would tell you that thestuff they serve there is dangerous.”LCB protestors spur campus-wide urge to get nakedBy Full E. BoloneyCharles O’Connell, Dean of Students inthe University, announced today that he isreconsidering his position of permanentlybanning the Lascivious Costume Ball(LCB).O’Connell stated. “I was quite surprised by the depth of support the LCB has Uni¬versity-wide.”After meeting with Bill Florida. StudentGovernment President, and Sara Maxwell,spokesperson for the Ad Hoc Committee toGet Down, O’Connell put together thiscompromise solution: the Lascivious Cos¬tume Ball will go on as scheduled except that only the costumes can attend.The Spring Formal will not be cancelled.A concerned student group has found anoff-campus location for the popular formaldance.Stymied by a perceived lack of space,Irene Conley, Director of the Student Ac¬tivities Office (SAO), stated last quarterthat SAO would not sponsor the event thisyear. In past years the event has been heldin the Ida Noyes gymnasium. Because thegym is being converted into a theatre aspart of an extensive remodeling plan, thereis insufficient floor space there for a largedance.Students to Save the Spring Formal havesecured the O K. of the Chicago Stadiummanagement to hold the dance in thestadium between halves in an upcomingBulls game. The date of the game and thedance will be announced later this month. n IfHeismancontinued from page oneFamily and friends of the trophy havegathered to keep vigil together during theordeal. Although not available for com¬ment, the family is believed to be willing topay ransom for the safe return of theHeisman.Security for other important U of Clandmarks has been increased to preventthe terrorist organization from strikingagain. The popular statue “Why” now lo¬cated in the Smart Gallery courtyard hasbeen placed under twenty-four-hour guard.Dean O’Connell, who has not been observedto move for over four years, has also beenplaced under guard to prevent him beingvandalized or stolen./how thebrainworksv JtfS|First Workshop:9:00- 10:30 a.m.Panelists: MEDICAL ETHICS:JUDAISM AND MODERN HEALTH CAREApril 6,1986 9 a.m. - 5:00 p,m.THE BEGINNING OF LIFE• Reproductive choices in an era ofnew possibilities• Sustaining impaired newborns:What measures are justified?• Medical decisions concerningchildren: doctors, parents anathe State Second Workshop:10:45 -12:15 p.m. THE COURSE OF LIFE• Allocation of resources: Highwaysor artificial hearts? How will wedecide?• What can be done about teenagepregnancy?• The neglected solutions:prevention and rehabilitationDr. Arthur F. Kohrman, Chair Panelists:Prof. Baruch A. BrodyRabbi Peter S. KnobelDr. Diana Woo Prof. Ann Dudley Goldblatt, ChairDr. David AxelrodProf. Charles BoskProf. George MeschelLuncheon Address JEWISH ETHICAL AND LEGAL PERSPECTIVES12:30 - 2:00 p.m. ON ORGAN TRANSPLANTS: WHOSE LIFE IS IT,ANYWAY?Dr. Fred RosnerProf. Leon R. Kass, ChairThird Workshop:2:00 - 3:30 p.m.Panelists: THE END OF LIFE Evening Address• Humane care for the dying: 3:45 - 5:00 p.m.Hospices vs. hospitals• Choosing to die: Living wills• How long to prolong life? Ethicalquestions, technical solutionsDr. Mark Siegler, ChairDr. Eric J. CassellProf. James M. GustafsonProf. Josef SternMEDICAL ETHICS: JUDAISM AND MODERN HEALTH CAREApril 6,1986 Ida Noyes Hall at9:00 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. The University of Chicago 1212 E. 59th Str.PREREGISTRATION FORM(Kindly respond by March 24,1986)ALL PARTICIPANTS MUST PREREGISTER, EITHER BY RETURNING THIS FORM TO:The B'nai B'rtth Hillel Foundation at the University of Chicago5715 S. Woodiawn Avenue, Chicago, Illinois 6063/OR BY CALLING THE HILLEL FOUNDATION AT 3127752-1127Ms. Barbara Gilbert, Administrative AssistantMs. Lisa Mendelson, Assistant Hillel DirectorRabbi Daniel I. Leifer, Hillel DirectorREGISTRATION FEE325 Regular Attendees, $K) Students, Senior CitizensA Kosher lunch and refreshments throughout the dayare included in the price of the registration.NamesAddressInstitutional Affiliation (if any)Make checks payable to: The B'nai Both Hiflel FoundationFor further information, or details regarding transportation, call the HillelFoundation at 752-1127.LIFE AND DEATH AND THE LAWThe Honorable Abner J. MikvaMr. Walter Roth, Esq., Chair16—The Chicago Maroon-Friday, April 4, 1986Unable to find that someone special?Tired of Hyde Park’s social atmosphere?Has studying ruined a former relationship?Does everyone you meet seem like a geek?There is a solution:Transfer.For more information write:Department of AdmissionsIllinois State UniversityNormal IllinoisApril Fools'AloneandUnattached?illil rl \ /~v YWe can help* ■mPTfiismi#-* •mPTff.g £54 3COPIESOur copies are greatOur machines are the latest/, and very fastOur people are anxious to please youOur service is swiftAnd all this for 5* What a deal!Qopywork* LtdThe Copy Center in Harper Court5210 S. Harper 288-COPYCenter for Clinical Medical Ethicspresents mmmm—mmammmm—mm*THE SPRING QUARTERMEDICAL ETHICS FILM SERIESThursday, April 10, 5:00-7 00 pmOne Flew Over the Cuckoo’s NestThis full-length. Academy Award winning film stars JackNicholson as McMurphy, a mental ward patient whoserebelliousness pits him against Nurse RatcneO and the fullspectrum of medical institutional repression. Enormously comicand deeply moving, this film prings to light issues of theindividual's freedom of choice and human Oignity within anoften insensitive and undignified hospital bureaucracy.Thursday, April 24, 12:10-1:10 pm“Doctor, I want”This compelling documentary supports the growing awarenessthat medical care is not an unlimited resource Who decideswhat degree of medical care goes to whom? "Doctor i Want"looks at both the patient's expectations and at the Americanhealthcare system's ability to deliver that careThursday, May 15, 5:00-7:00 pmThe Elephant ManThis Academy Award winning motion picture stars John Hurtand Anne Bancroft in a story of the triumph of human dignityover ignorance, prejudice, greed, and fear Based on a truestory set in turn of the century EnglanO, this film examines thecomplex emotional experiences faced by a severely deformedman when he is discovered by d dedicated physician. Thismoving film presents ethical issues concerning the doctor-patienTrelationship, medical ''curiosity'', and society's rejectionof the "abnormal". It affirms the importance of healthprofessionals' kindness and civility toward patients in their careRefreshments will be servedThursday, May 22,12.10-12:45 pmDeath and Dying: The Physician’s PerspectiveThis excellent, award-winning film otters an honest, thought-provoking and constructive portrayal of the individualphysician's internal struggles to come to grips with the Oeaths ofpatients. Nine practicing physicians from different specialtiesspeak candidly about their experiences in Pealing with death,how it affects their relationships with patients ana their families,and how it has influenced their personal livesFREE TO THE PUBLICAll films will be shown in Room J137,The Brain Research Building, 5812 S. EllisThe Chicago Maroon- Friday, April 4, 1986 17“We bringdumpsterdivingto a newlow.”Weekly SpecialMixed-UpBeans, Jellyand Lima,3$/lb.Donuts, freshfrom Dunkin'•onut’s Dumpstefr25$/doz.Bananas,Squashed orBruised, YourChoice lOtt/lb.Hey Ladies!Cucumbers15$ eachLettuce,Green: 25$ aHeadBrown: 5$ aHeadWe dive thebest dumpstersto bringyou incredibleSAVINGSApril Fool*' BOSTONUNIVERSITYSummer Term 1986Boston University is the place to bethis summer! Take advantage of theexcellent academic resources of world-renowned Boston University while youenjoy the unique atmosphere of one ofthe world's mostdynamic cities-/ ■ 400 credit courses in forty-foursubject areas■ Two six-week sessions: May 20-June 28 and July 1-August 9■ Undergraduate and graduate courses■ Day or evening classes■ Register by mail or in personREGISTRATION BEGINS APRIL 22.For a free copy of the Summer Term1986 Bulletin and Guide to BostonExperienced travelers agree:DON'T GOWITHOUT“LEFSGW”They’re the most comprehensive budget guide booksavailable today—with up-to-date information onwhere to stay what to eat, what to see, and how to getthere. It’s the only guide you’ll ever need.“Unique and uniquely appealing...The more I read other guidebooks, themore Hike LET’S GO.”—Time MagazineLETSHarvard Student Agencies, Inc.EUROPE • USA • BRITAIN &IRELAND • FRANCE • ITALY •ISRAEL & EGYPT • GREECE •MEXICO*SPAIN, PORTUGAL &MOROCCO • CALIFORNIA &PACIFIC NORTHWEST$9.95 each (Europe, $10.95) ST. MARTIN’S PRESS18—The Chicago Maroon—Friday. April 4. 1986Volunteer3 Income Tax Assistance, FreeIncomeTax Help9 AM - 3 PM Every Saturday from now until April12, except March 15, in the basement of the HydePark Food Co-op, 55th Street and Lake Park Drive.The VITA program is designed to provide tree la* as¬sistance at community locations to individuals whocannot afford professional ta* help Volunteers assistpeople with simple tax returns, particularly lower in¬come. elderty. non-English speaking and handicappedtaxpayers There is no charge lor this serviceThe Institute of Social and Behavioral Pathologyannounces a symposium onPOLITICAL VIOLENCE: TERRORISMModerators: Lawrence Z. Freedman, M.D.William Carroll, Ph.D., LL.D.Wednesdays, April 9, May 14, June 117:30 p.m.Suite 3501 North, 5020 South Lake Shore DriveFor further information, please call 753-2347All members of the University of Chicago community invited Campus veg projectBy Adriana E. McCorreyThe Advisory Committee for the Selec¬tion of Means to Protect Campus Vegeta¬tion decided that a portion of the StudentActivities fund should be diverted towardsits new project, according to Dr. ConradGrean, committee head and acting Chair ofthe Department of Noninexpensive SpecialProjects.The project, he explained, was relevantto the University community as a whole,but mostly to the students because “stu¬dents are generally concerned with mat¬ters such as these which comprise an in¬escapable part of their daily activities.”Grean further commented, “The purposeof committees like our is primarily toobserve and monitor certain areas of stu¬ dent concern and respond to them in such away that the students are convinced weknow what we’re doing. ’The amount of money requested from theStudent Activities fund is, according toGrean, “no more than the careful consid¬eration of certain objective members of ourfinancial subcommittee have deemednecessary.”The project has not yet been initiated dueto a temporary misinterpretation of thespecifics of the final draft of the proposal.Research should commence around thefirst two weeks of the next winter quartercontaining a February 29. The projectshould take from two to seven and 3/4 yearsfor completion depending on availability ofmaterials.ROTCcontinued from page onesince Northwestern could use it to theiradvantage. But just look at how manyhealthy tans there are on campus. Thosedidn’t all come from sitting on a beach inFlorida! A lot of fine young people fromthis University were hard at work trainingwhile other students were out joy riding onvacation. It’s a good thing that somebodycares about defending this campus!”Students who are participating in theprogram, although they can not be named,were available for comment. When askedwhat she feels that the biggest benefit ofthe proposed ROTC program is, a fourthyear humanities major stated, “Copingwith stress. I mean, like there I was, tryingto write my senior paper and stressing* outall over. So I went to the ROTC camp and afew hours behind a machine gun on thepractice range made me feel so serene thatmy writing just flowed. Sure, the rapgroups they have on campus are fine, andstudent mental health really tries, but forwriter’s block and general stress I thinkthere’s nothing better than blowing awaytargets, especially moving ones.”A second year philosophy major agreedthat ROTC would be very beneficial for thecampus. “One of the main complaintsabout this place is that you just don’tcommunicate with other people, that noone really cares about how others feel. ROTC changed all that for me. You have toget to know the people you’re training withso that you can be sure they’ll back you upwhen those swine from Northwestern startpumping lead at you.”Sinaiko SackedBy Vish E. BuhoA confidential source within the admin¬istration today revealed that the committeeseeking to find a new Dean of Students inthe College to replace Herman Sinaiko ishaving a great deal of difficulty finding areplacement. Although the committee hasconsidered candidates from all parts of theUniversity, none of those approached hasshown any interest in the job.According to the confidential source, noone on the faculty wants the position be¬cause they "don’t want to deal with abunch of childish and whiny students, andthe office of the Dean is far too small.”Administration officials are therefore con¬sidering doing away with what has longbeen considered a superfluous position.When asked why they didn't considersomeone not on the faculty, a high-rankingadministration official answered, "Are youkidding?”VSTUDENT- ■v .mActivities • i■ ■ . ; . • . > ••*t •. . . MOi -FICE ••• • ’ 4iISPRING ECLECTIC ED InJPOWER AEROBICS Rosalinde Vome ' "MAEROBICS Sara Edelman 1MIDDLE EASTERN (OR BELLY) DANCING I Rosalinde VomeMIDDLE EASTERN (OR BELLY) DANCING II Rosalinde Vome il '' HATHA YOGA WITHIN THE IYENGAR TRADITION Kathleen Wright iSIGN LANGUAGE I A1 Marks JSIGN LANGUAGE II A1 Marks • >■;|BASIC DARKROOM TECHNIQUES John Hudak •;1SPRING PHOTOGRAPHY John Hudak 1j MEXICAN COOKING Queta BauerCHIMERA: SELF DEFENSE FOR WOMEN G.C. Guard> /I'.-’f:/v. INDIAN COOKING Mrs. SinghAFRO-CARIBBEAN DANCE Harry Detry J5 IMPROVISATIONAL THEATER WORKSHOP Steve SchroerIKEBANA Ikka NakashimaJAPANESE COOKING Ikka NakashimaLEARNING CALLIGRAPHY Linda WhiteBICYCLE MAINTENANCE (TBA from Arts Bicycle Shop)»^Rcglster^n_RM^10_o|_Id^Noycs^al!^a^m^^Km.The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—19UnderAge?We’ll sellyouboozebeforeyourtime... PLANNING TO BE IN NEW YORK THIS SUMMER?Are you wondering where you might find a place to live? Barnard College offerssummer housing at moderate rates to students who plan to work or study in NewYork City. Dormitory facilities are available from the end of May through the middleof August.Located at 116th and Broadway, Barnard College is adjacent to ColumbiaUniversity and accessible to all of the cultural resources of the city.Barnard’s dormitories offer a varieting of living arrangements — singles, doublesand apartments.FOR ADDITIONAL INFORMATION AND APPLICATION WRITE:Jean McCurryDirector of Summer ProgramsBarnard College3009 BroadwayNew York, New York 10027-6598or Call(212) 280-8021BARNARDBlack LabelWeekend!All BlaCkLabel BeerffedPre-MixedRum andCoke: OneGallon $3.00 CornellUniversityhas a place for youthis summer.Wonderful courses, great professors, magnificentenvironment, people from everywhere,lots of good things happening -come enjoy it all.Send me Cornell's Summer Session Announcement of credit coursesand special programs.NameAddressCity/State/ZipCollegeCORNELL UNIVERSITY, BOX 96, B12 IVES, ITHACA, NY 14853 607/255-4987The Institute of Social and Behavioral Pathologyannounces a symposium onRESPONSIBILITY:Personal, Psychiatric, and Legal ConceptsModerators: Lawrence Z. Freedman, M.D.William Carroll, Ph.D., LL.D.Tuesdays, April 8, May 6, June 37:30 p.m.Suite 3501 North, 5020 South Lake Shore DriveFor further information, please call 753-2347All members of the University of Chicago community invited The experience I had inIsrael was the most meaningfulexperience of mg life:'— Randall Lending, Vanderbilt University, 1985 ParticipantISRAEL. SUMMER PROGRAMSfor lx)th first time visitors and returneesSTUDENTSExplore the LandO Jerusalem1HdcKaust SeminarExperience KibbutzHebrew Ulpan on KibbutzVolunteer in a Development TownSEMINAR FOR JEWISHACADEMICIANS May 25-June 11June 15-July 3July 20-August 11July 2-July 31July 2-July 31July 2-August 14June 10-August 14July 2 -August 7June 29-August 7For an Information Brochure write or callIsrael Summer Programs1640 Rhode Island Avenue. NWWashington, DC 20056Telephone 202-857-6552 or 6563contact your local Hillei ol*• 752-117220—The Chicago Maroon—f iday, April 4, 1986The Ivy HabitYale University is spending$560,000 to tear down and replaceall the vines on its venerable ivycovered campus. The reason?The species of vine at Yale canbe used to manufacture a pow¬erful narcotic. EnterprisingYalies discovered this fact andsoon students with a littleknowledge of chemistry wereproducing large quantities of thedrug."fa'ie officials discovered thedrug operations when they in¬vestigated why so much of theivy on the buildings was dis-appearing. Further in¬vestigations turned up the factthat students learned of thepotential of the vines from a newclass called The Botany of Yale.The professor Harold Stock-weiler mentioned in passing thatthe vines could be used in drugmanufacture and students in theclass were quick to act upon it.Officials uncovered a complexdistillation system located in thechemistry building, but havebeen unable to press chargesagainst anyone. Oh, thoseYalies!Hahvahd’s BoughtThe University of Texas con¬firmed reports today that it haspurchased Harvard University’sentire English Department at anundisclosed price. HawthorneMcGuilly, a spokesman for theUniversity of Texas, said thatthe move will begin, “as soon aswe can get them little doggies onthe trail.”McGuilly said that the Har¬vard professors will have to re¬construct their curriculum a bitto meet the interests of theTexas student body. “We’re a‘hopin' that they’ll add a fewLouis L’Amour books to thereading lists, along with a doseof Zane Gray.”Final negotiations concerningthe move ended today as confu¬sion over exactly what was beingmoved was cleared up. Appar¬ ently the University of Texas didnot take kindly to what they sawas the Eastern university’s at¬tempts to shortchange them.“We bought us an English de¬partment, and that’s what we’regetting, right down to the wastepaper baskets. Imagine, theytried to tell us that we didn’thave any right to the office fur¬niture! That’s like buying ahorse without no tail,” com¬mented McGuilly. He said thatHarvard officials became muchmore amiable after a little“Texas calling card” (a fewrounds of stray buckshot) wasfired at the administrationbuilding.Eat cheese or...A group of students at theUniversity of Wisconsin atMadison have started a move¬ment to change the state’sslogan. Kurt Rottler, a spokes¬man for the group, said that,“The present slogans ‘America’sDairyland’, and ‘Escape to Wis¬consin’ just don’t correctly por¬tray the true nature of Wisconsinlife. We believe the new sloganshould be, ‘Eat cheese or die’.“We feel that this slogan muchbetter represents the feelings ofthe natives. Cheese means a lotto us here and we think thateveryone should have to eat it.Why do you think we have somany cheese stands along thehighways? For our health? No.We do it because we love cheese.And so should you, or you shoulddie.”The movement appears to begaining considerable supportthroughout Wisconsin and a billis going to be introduced in thestate legislature making it acrime punishable by death to noteat cheese.Scotch and Soda StudyBreaksGopher is out, Opus is in at theU of Minn. That's right, althoughit may be known as the GopherState, students at the Universityof Minnesota recently ralliedCollege News s®******^***^^^behind Opus the Penguin ofcomic strip fame in their studentgovernment elections. The oncepopular Gopher “Go Fer It”party was crushed by penguinpopularity in last Thursday’selections. Opus was elected toevery student government posi¬tion at the University of Min¬nesota in a landslide victory.BLOOM COUNTY Students say the surge in pen¬guin power represents a newyuppie attitude on the campus.“We’re tired of being called the‘Moo campus’,” said one soph¬omore, “We need representa¬tives like Opus who will incitecorruption, party machines, andother high class stuff. Sure theGopher party was honest, but that’s just too down homey andboring for us.” Opus recentlyran on a platform which pro¬mised scotch and soda studybreaks rather than the tradi¬tional beer busts at the end ofeach semester. When asked tocomment on his recent rise topower, Opus replied, “Huh?”by BerkeM A BAP MOP/(\ MP, my, ST1HKYWMMPIMTMUCH CAM, FOR tTf\ mm.vtmuo*>~GerTO IT/ CH6ER Me. (#7RtbHT NOW ! CHEER ME UP<x, so Has*e, rum\ my riKNPsuirusmte!iv m to apologize for mybehaviour yesterray. i wasA FOUL-MDUTHEP RUMP ANP5H0ULP BE PUTIFULLY KEEL'mvup FOR IT. w hope of once again sittingtogether in ewmnoop,ALLOW ME TO OFFER THE F0L~ICMMb GESTURE AS A TOKENOF IRY AFFECTION...00'..AH' YES..A umeLOWER, MY POUE-OO.' WHAT'WHAT'S THAT. MY LITTLE0OO0OOCITOS ?... WHY NO.. HO,I PONT THINK A QUICK FOOTMASSAGE W0ULP HURT YOURJOURNALISTIC CREPIBIUTY, MISS WAS 1 TftUQNE OUTLOUP AGAIN ?' UHATVYOU HEAR ?'NAMESDETAILS f WHAT." MT”YOU PIP PIPNT YOU /" 900 .mu tTfm it'mhit/ COME ALONE,my umetooeoocrros.THE EARLY MUSIC SERIESPresentsTAFELMUSIKCanada’s Premiere Baroque OrchestrawithMarion Verbruggen, Virtuoso Recorder PlayeronTuesday, April 8,1986Mandel Hall8:00 PMFor Tickets Call962-8068 THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGOJOHN M. OLIN CENTERpresentsa lecture byEDGAR MORIN/ /Ecole des Hautes Etudes enSciences SocialesonPro-Americanismand Anti-Americanism inFrench Cultural PoliticsWednesday, April 9, 19864:00 p.m.Harper Memorial LibraryRoom 130, 1116 East 59th StreetThe Chicago Maroon Friday, April 4, 198C 21^ I ^ Selection ^Footprint SandalsSizes and preferredcolors for men, women,children;o&m Jh667-94711534 East 55th Street(Hyde Park Shopping Cen'i., MON-SAT 9-6SUN 11-3 -— - — r-»SAO and University Food ServiceApril Fools Come as your favorite entree !Ida Noyes Dance Room fin the basement)April 3,7-9 pm $7 Admission22—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986 Before you makea long distance commitment,make sure you knowwhat you’reAT&TThe right choice.If Fletcher Christian and Captain Bligh had knownwhat being stuck in the same boat would mean, chancesare neither would have set foot aboard.And if you’re stuck in the same boat with a longdistance company that doesn’t give you all the servicesyou need, it’s easy to harbor mutinous thoughts.But when you pick AT&T as your long distancecompany, you know you’re in for smooth sailing. You’llget trouble-free, reliable service. Immediate longdistance connections—even at the busiest hours. Andlong distance operators to assist you with immediate credit for wrong numbers and collect calling.And you’ll get discounts off our Day Rate on yourstate-to-state calls. With savings of over 50% duringweekends until 5pm Sundays, or nights from 11pm to8am, Sunday through Friday. And 40% discounts eve¬nings between 5pm and 11pm, Sunday through Friday.So when you’re asked to choose a long distancecompany, sign aboard with AT&T. With AT&T LongDistance Service, you’ll never be left stranded. Just call1 800 222-0300 for more information or tochoose AT&T Reach out and touch someone.®By Rory E. SchwartzDoug Flutie, the exiled quarterback fromDonald Trump’s “dream backfield” will beattending the University of Chicago Grad¬uate School of Business starting in theAutumn quarter of 1986.In a story exclusive to The Maroon, itwas learned that Flutie had purchased thefinal year of his contract with the NewJersey Generals in order to pursue a mas¬ters degree in business administration. Theofficial announcement from Flutie is ex¬pected sometime later this month.Although we have been unable to talk toFlutie directly, it has been rumored thatFlutie wants a brief retirement from foot¬ball. After finishing his Heisman Trophyseason at Boston College and then imme¬diately starting a twenty game season withthe New Jersey Generals, Doug Flutie feelsburned out. With a cool $2.8 million tuckedaway in the bank and the mortgages of 12%of Hackensack New Jersey, Flutie wants tobe able to use his capital to start his owncompany.We were able to speak to Flutie’s lovelywife Bunny about her husband’s changefrom the playing field to the classroom. Ina telephone conversation yesterday BunnyFlutie said, “I’m so happy for Dougie- Flutie wishes his coach goodbyewuggie. Now he won’t have so many boo- she is quite impressed with the outstandingboos and we can be snuggly-wuggly all faculty at the GSB, and she is sold on theyear long. Dougie-wuggie is so small that school because of its meritorious standinghe gets hurt very easily.” Between squeals in the world’s business community,and giggles Mrs. Flutie went on to say that Reaction on the homefront has been quite jubilant. The Dean of the GSR John P.Gould is “deyghted” that Mr. Flutie haschosen the University of Chicago. But themost enthusiastic reaction has come fromoutside the Business School. According toJeff Elton of the Alumni Office of the GSB,alums and other dignitaries that haveheard about the Flutie signing just couldnot believe it. “When I told George Schulzhe made several high pitched welpingsounds; he sounded kind of like a harp seal.Secretary Schulz told me that he is going towear his University of Chicago tie to Libyawhen he meets with Kadafi, and he isrequiring everyone in the State Depart¬ment to wear the polyester phoenix for atleast three days every month.”Most of the speculation surrounding theFlutie affair is not why he decided to cometo Chicago, but rather if he has the abilityto cut the academic mustard. Flutie, an artappreciation major, did not graduate fromBoston College until February 1986.Doug Flutie will be the third Heismantrophy winner to be associated with theUniversity of Chicago. The other trophywinners are Jay Berwanger, the firstHeisman winner, and O.J. Simpson whosebrief stay at the University occured in 1974when his rented car suffered a flat tire onLake Shore Drive between 56th and 57thStreets.Doug Flutie to take on the GSB this seasonCawi wows crowd after track nationalsBy Scott E. BernardSt. Paul, Minn. — As darkness descendson this sleepy Midwestern hamlet, childrenall over St. Paul are putting aside theirHeman and Mr. T toys. They won’t beneeding them this March 21 evening. To¬night they are traveling to the airport towelcome their favorite hero; the Univer¬sity of Chicago’s burly sophomore shot-putter, Mark Cawi.Shrieks go up as the 240-pound youngsterambles into the terminal. A sea of childrenwashes up to him, lapping at his knees.Cawi picks up a little girl, pretends thathe’s going to throw her like a shot, tossesher straight up instead, catches her, andsets the giggling lass down with a pat onher head. The other tots laugh along withher. Normally shy and reserved, Cawiopens up around children, letting his natu¬ rally ebullient personality bubble over. Heknows how to please children. Time waswhen Cawi was a child himself — it wasn’tthat long ago.Cawi, 19, is a hero to these kids becausehe has shown them that, with hard workand perseverance, youth can succeed.During his freshman track season, Cawiwas merely a slightly above-average shot-putter. He threw over 45 feet only a coupleof times and only by a few inches. Duringthe off-season he concentrated on increas¬ing his strength and improving his tech¬nique, and his efforts returned handsomedividends. This season he put the shot closeto 50 feet, much to the delight of childrenacross the nation who had taken the youngman to heart. They followed him closely ashe edged even closer to the National’squalifying standard of 51 feet. Cawi never made that standard, but hiswinning throw of 49T0-1/4” at the MidwestCollegiate Athletic Conference IndoorChampionships placed him among the topdozen shot-putters in Division III andthereby qualified him for Nationals. Be¬cause he strained a stomach muscle inpractice for Nationals and thereforecouldn’t throw his best, Cawi was reluctantto go to Nationals. But he decided to gobecause he didn’t want to disappoint theyoung fans who had written to him duringthe season.On the morning of March 22 Cawi en¬gaged in preliminary competition at BethelCollege. All little eyes in the gymnasiumwere upon him as he launched his firstthrow. The shot traveled 47 feet. It wasgood, but not good enough to make thefinals. Just before his second throw he noticed a little boy who was crying becausehe couldn’t see “Uncle Mark.” Feelingsorry for the boy, Cawi set him on hisshoulder for a better view of his throw,even though he knew this would upset histechnique. It did, but Cawi had the satis¬faction of knowing he had made the boyhappy. After his lousy second throw, Cawiscratched on his third and final prelimi¬nary throw, thereby failing to make thefinals.Cawi was dejected over his failure tomake the finals because he though he hadlet his fans down, not because he wanted toglory of victory. But as children crowdedaround him after the competition, he knewhe still occupied a place in their hearts. Helooked down at the upturned faces smilingat him, and he knew he would be back nextyear. For the kids.Some rent just an apartmentOthers... a Lifestyle!Lakefront rental residences and..."Year round Resort Club • Gourmet MarketPanoramic Views • Nationally-acclaimed GardenClubs and activities • Artists-In-ResidenceStudio-3 bedroom apartments • 2 bedrooms from $6905050 Lake Shore Drive, Chicago, Illinois 60615288-5050"A lifestyle designed for you...by The Clinton Company" &r€&esits— INTERNATIONAL NIGHTS —A Salute to Foods from Around the WorldApril 7,8 & 9 Northern Italian NightsCalamari all olio, Ravioli stuffed with Lobster andSpinach, Veal Picante, Italian BreadApril 14,15 & 16 Slavic SpecialtiesDill Soup with Veal and Sour Cream, Musaka, Crepes,Celeriac Salad, Hot StrudelApriL 21,22 & 23 Belgian OfferingsFondue Bruxellaise, Waterzooi of Chicken Fruit Cream,dark Chocolate CreamsDON’T MISS THIS TRAVELOG OF GUSTATORIAL DELIGHTSFor every International Meal purchased, Mallory’s will donate onedollar to the HP CHAMBER OF COMMERCE OUTDOORSCULPTURE FUNDCALL EARLY FOR RESERVATIONS 241-5600The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—23Maroons just miss NCAA tournamentBy Lenny E. GeorgeRene Goulet is livid.The NCAA announced its Division hockeytournament bids Monday, and for the sec¬ond straight season Goulet’s University ofChicago Maroons finished just shy of earn¬ing a berth in the eight-team extravaganza.“With the schedule we play, with Divi¬sion I teams like North Dakota State andIllinois-Chicago, we should be there,” saidhead coach Goulet, whose Maroons skatedto a 21-9 record and took the North Divisiontitle in the Midwest Conference. The U of Copened some eyes earlier this season whenthey dropped a 3-2 decision to Division Ipowerhouse North Dakota State in the an¬nual Rocket Richard Classic at McGillUniversity in Montreal.Apparently the Maroons’ performanceagainst the Division III schools, especiallythe embarrassing 10-1 loss to Ripon inJanuary, kept the Maroons out of the tour¬nament. The Rock“It’s amazing what this kid has doneconsidering this school’s super pressure-cooker environment,” Goulet said of goalieRocky Martelli, who once again took All-Conference honors and was third in Divi¬sion III with a 2.98 goals against average.The Maroons’ wacky practice schedule(they practice at 4 a.m. on weekdays at theJackson Park Ice Arena) might take its tollon some of the players, but Martelli wasn’tphased.“Piece of cake,” said the Brooklyn na¬tive, who was almost suspended for theseason after a stick-swinging incident ear¬lier this year against Beloit.Martelli had allegedly hit Buccaneer left¬winger Paul Kosminskas in the groin withthe butt of his stick in the second period ofthe February 1 game at home, but theConference officials ruled that he was justdefending his crease and did not pass asentence.Goulet felt the team performed excel¬ lently throughout the season, especially inlight of the tremendous pressure placed onGoulet earlier in the season by AthleticDepartment Chairman Mary Jean Mul-vaney.“She said I’d have to go back to zambonidriving if I didn’t produce a winner thisseason,” Goulet commented, as the Mar¬oons’ hockey program had struggled everyyear since its elevation from club to varsitystatus in 1982. Because of expense ofequipment and ice rental, the U of C hadthreatened to give the program the axe if itdidn’t start producing.Crucial to that surge in the program wasfreshman Jim Harlor, who is also on theMaroons’ varsity track team. Goulet re¬cruited Harlor from Canton (MA) HighSchool as a defenseman, but when severalplayers went down with injuries in pre¬season Goulet placed Harlor on the secondline at center.Harlor responded with a goal and assistagainst Illinois Tech, then exploded forThe great beers of the world go by one name: Lowenbrau. Brewed in Munich, 4in England, Sweden. Canada. Japan and here in .America for a distinctive world class taste.3hsWorldCallsForLciwenbrauC 1985 Miller Brewing Co Milwaukee. Wl four goals in an 8-1 vidtory over MoodyBible Institute during Christmas Break.That earned him a promotion to the start¬ing lineup, and the powerful 6-2, 215pounder finished the year with 31 goals and28 assists to set the Maroons’ All-Timesingle season scoring record, previouslyheld by Rainer Hollerbach (Fairbanks,Alaska). Hollerbach missed the entire 1985-86 season with an eye injury he sufferedduring a chemistry experiment in the fall.Goulet, riding high at mid-season with a12-2 record, saw things fall apart whendiscipline problems began with Harlor.Besides the problem of keeping him out ofthe penalty box (he averaged three minorpenalties per game) Goulet also had tokeep him in the Regenstein. Other schoolshad begun to question Harlor’s academicqualifications.“I can add and subtract fractions,” theyoungster said. “Not everyone can come inhere and win the Pulitzer Prize for physicsor whatever, you know,” he added in ref¬erence to Hollerbach’s status as one of theUniversity’s finest physics students.The other pleasent surprise was theemergence of Gary Moss as a force on thedefense. Only a part-time player in highschool, the Norfolk, VA native stepped intoa starting role after teammate KevinO’Reilly was suspended for blowing chowon a stewardess during an impromptuquarters game on the flight back fromMontreal.Moss even chipped in offensively, scoring3 goals and adding 16 assists, but anothercontribution was his ability to draw penal¬ties by taking dives. Opposing crowdswould pick up on the tactic a’§ shout “G-4”or “G-8” as dive scores 'Senever Mossappeared to take the fall.Goulet is excited about the party-heartyMaroons for 1986-87, and wants to shape histeam into a more physical style with somegoon-type players. “If you see a lot ofgargoyles in the pic book next fall, youknow my recruiting was successful,” saidGoulet, whose team will never win anyprizes for grace or beauty.Hockey analyst Mark Blocker had selec¬ted the Maroons for an NCAA bid this year.—m $M70(V-CHINESE-AMERICAN RESTAURANTSpecializing in Cantoneseand American dishesOpen Daily 1 1 A 8 30 P MClosed Monday1318 E. 63rd W04-1042RESEARCHSend $2 for catalogof over 16,000 topics toassist your research ef¬forts. For info., call toll-free 1-800^21-5745 (in Il¬linois call 312-922-0300).Authors Research, Rm 600-N,407 S. Dearborn. Chicago, II 60605GIVEBLOODPLAYRUGBY/DrTmORTON R. MASLOV ^OPTOMETRIST•EYE EXAMINATIONS•FASHION EYEWEAR(one year warranty on eyeglassframes and glass lenses)SPECIALIZING IN• ALL TYPES OFCONTACT LENSES•CONTACT SUPPLIESTHE HYDE PARKSHOPPING CENTER1510 E. 55th363-610024—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986/First indoor triathalonSuzy E. SlickAfter much “behind closed doors” debateand haggling the University of Chicago hasfinally garnered the rights to host the firstever all-indoor triathalon on May 27, 1986.This triathalon, affectionately dubbed the“metal fatigue man” by its inceptors willbe sponsored by the U of C and theSchwunn Bicycles Company. The race dis¬tances will be equivalant to those of mosttriathalons - that is, 1.2 mile swim, 26 milebike ride and a 6.2 mile run but in theusually unusual U of C fashion all legs ofthe event will be held indoors.In order to complete the race each com¬petitor must swim 100 laps of the Barlettpool then run over to Henry Crown FieldHouse and pedal a stationary bike for theequivalent of 26 miles. The bicycles, XR-8models provided by Schwunn, will be set upon the interior of the Field House track.The last leg requires 44-48 laps around thetrack. This lap count of course dependsupon the lane in which the competitor runs.The initial apprehension about the U of Clocation that was voiced by Schwunn execsrevolved around the potentially chaoticnature of the proposed event. According totheir spokesman, the company was worriedthat there would be too many difficultiesinvolved in monitoring whether an athletehad completed 100 laps as opposed to 98.Also, there was a question whether thefacilities could accomodate a large number oi competitors.These doubts were quickly laid to rest byan excited and agressive U of C adminis¬tration. Part of the proposal was to limitentries to 200 athletes. One hundred placeswill be reserved for U of C students andfaculty, and the rest for a first come, firstserved basis. For the problem of monitor¬ing, the administration volunteered itselfas race officials. President Hanna Grayherself will serve in the pool area, makingsure each contestant touches the edge be¬fore turning. According to the officials’supervisor/organizer and Women’s Ath¬letic Director Rosalie Resch, vigilance willbe very tight. “Yep. uh-huh,” said Resch,“We’re looking have a 4:1 contestant/offi¬cial ratio. There should be no problem.Nooo problem at all.”“We the administration,” says PresidentGray, “feel that this event is an excellentopportunity for our fine institution toshowcase our athletic facilities and ourpioneering spirit. I don’t doubt that indoortriathalons like this will be the rage in thenineties.” The winner of this event willhave the dubious honor of being the histor¬ical first winner of an all-indoor trialhalon.Of course he/she will also be the courserecord holder. The administration hopesthat these firsts will place U of C on theproverbial map; or at least distinguish itfrom U of I-Circle. As with all triathlonsprizes (a Kuviasungnerk/Kangieko t-shirt)will be presented to the first three finishersin each age category.Two indicted for cocaine saleBy Velvet E. JoneA junior and a senior on the men’svarsity basketball team were indictedTuesday on cocaine possession and traf¬ficking charges. Their indictment ended athree month long investigation which hopesto be able to name twelve others in the ringbefore the investigation comes to a close.The two players estimatedly grossedclose to six million dollars since bringingtheir operation to the University of Chic¬ago. The investigation started immediatelyafter the Lawrence University road trip inJanuary. The two nameless basketballplayers used these frequent Wisconsin road trips to transport as many as 25 kilometersof cocaine back to Chicago. The two, nowdubbed “the Cheesehead Connection” re¬portedly would stop in at one of the manyWisconsin Cheese factories where they hadsources, and buy what looked like inno¬cently packaged goatshead cheese. Thecheese was then taken back to schoolwithout suspicion because both the playersare from Wisconsin and other team mem¬bers naturally assumed that their pur¬chases were from a love of cheese ratherthan coke.The prosecuting commission, headed byMr. Commissioner, Kevin McCarthy is go¬ing to name remaining suspects in hearingsto be held on a University-wide level.Put the pastin yourfuture!LIVE IN AN HISTORIC LANDMARKThoroughly renovated apartments offer generous floor space com¬bined with old-fashioned high ceilings. Park and lakefront providea natural setting for affordable elegance with dramatic views.—All new kitchens and appliances—Wall-to-wall carpeting —Resident manager—Air conditioning —Round-the-clock security—Optional indoor or —Laundry facilities onoutdoor parking each floor—Piccolo Mondo European gourmet food shop and cafeStudios, One-, Two- and Three-Bedroom ApartmentsOne-bedroom from $555 • Two-bedroom from $765Rent includes heat, cooking gas and master TV antennaCall for information and ^ appointment—643 1406(jCMemmftaise1642 East 56th StreetIn Hyde Park, across the park fromThe Museum of Science and IndustryEqual Housing Opportunity Manfcd by Metroplex, ln< U. of Chicago/SchwunnINDOORTriathalonMAY 27,1986Call 975-6501 toreserve placement as acompetitor.April Foots!New all U phys.By Bea E. ToughAn all-University physical education re¬quirement will begin next month accordingto Mary Jean Mulvaney, chairman of thePhysical Education department.Mulvaney said that this requirementcomes as a result of a recent study on thefitness of U of C faculty, administrators,staff, and students. That survey found thatwhile 35% of the administrators can runhalf a mile, only 26.5% of students. 10% offaculty and 5% of the staff could.“We found the shape of staff, par¬ticularly those in the physical plant de¬partment, to be disgraceful,” Mulvaneynoted, adding “instead of their four hourcoffee breaks at Cobb Coffee Shop, theywill now run to the Field House for aero¬bics, judo and aikido.” ed. requirementMulvaney prides herself on this exerciseprogramming, adding that the U of C se¬curity force will soon be obsolete as 3/4 ofHyde Park will know enough self-defense todefend themselves.To encourage students and others toreally learn the self-defense, the physicaleducation department will place bullies onthe street corners of 57th, 55th, 53rd fromCottage Grove to the Lake to incite andrough up passers-by starting this week.Security will not respond to any calls ofassault or battery.Mulvaney also pointed out that the highnumber of fit administrators seems to be aresult of their job experience. “They'rejust used to running the other way when¬ever they see students,” Mulvaney ex¬plained.NEXT TIMEYOUR PARENTS COMPLAINABOUT THE HIGH COSTOF COLLEGE TUITIONTELL THEM TO CUT IT OUT.Simply cut out and completethis coupon, then mail toPathway Financial,Student Loan Section,3843 West 63rd Street,Chicago, IL 60629Name We ll send you the Pathway StudentLoan Application of your choice anda brochure with more information Orrequest our application and brochureby phone (312)585-0099. I'm interested in:□ IGLP□ PLUS□ ALASAddressGry State •Phone ' Your ColleaeIs Fathway Financial advocating studentrebellion? Certainly not We just want tohelp you and your family pay for your collegeeducation That's why at Pathway we havea unique "open-door* policy that meansyou're not required to be a current Pathwaycustomer to qualify for a student loanAnd. as the third largest student loan lenderin Illinois, with assets over $12 billion, weoffer you not just one. but three low interest’ student loan programsIGLP (Illinois Guaranteed Loan Program)—Offers undergraduate and graduatestudents a low interest loan that you don't have to pay back until yougraduate or finish your studiesPLUS (Parent Loans for UndergraduateStudents)—Allows higher income fam¬ilies to qualify for low interest loansALAS (Auxiliary Loans to Assist Students)—Long term loans for independentundergraduate and graduate studentsSo the next time your parents complainabout the high cost of college educationtell them to cut it out—the coupon, that is—and send it to Pathway Financial Or call ourStudent Loan Section at (312) 585-0099 formore information.Fsnr PATHWAYFINANCIAL ►edero Assoc otoeIIMOIRCorporate Headquarters: 100 N. State St., Chicago, IL 60602 • (312) 346-4200The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—25New, multicoursetuition discountVisiting students save 20% on 2courses; 25% on 3 courses.Now... Northwestern offers theambitious visiting student an extraincentive to attend theSummerSession. a 20% savings onthe total tuition cost of twocourses ... a 25% savings on three.VCTiether you are completingrequirements or exploring a newfield, there’s the challenge ofNorthwestern. Nearly 250 coursesare offered in the College of Artsand Sciences; the TechnologicalInstitute; and the Schools ofEducation, Music, and Speech. Courses range from TelevisionComedy, Strategic Planning andManagement, and Sociology ofSex Roles to Organic Chemistry,Crime and the Novel,Photography: and Music inVienna There are even 13Intensity Study sequences that letstudents earn a full year’s credit ineight weeks in language, science,or mathDetails on all courses and on thenew multicourse tuition discountplan are in the SummerSessionBulletin along with a register by¬mail application. Order your freecopy today.Six- and eight-week sessionsbegin June 23Call Toll Free during regular office hours:1-800-562-5200 ext. 300NORTHWESTERNUNIVERSITYSummerSession2003 Sheridan Road. Evanston, IL 60201 (312) 491-5250Academic excellence in a most favorable climate come see thenew model camera& videoDEATH STALKDEVtLS. THEDON'T LOOK NOWDR. TEREATENEXTERMiNATOfFEAR NO EViLFRANKENSTEIN ViDEODROMEWfTCHiNG TIMENIGHT OF THE LIVING DEADPHANTASMPOLTERGJRRORSSILENT SCREAM, THEMBER PARTYH, FINAL. CHIGHGRHALLOWEENHORROR EXPRESSHUNGER, THEI SWT-ON YOUR GRAVEINVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERSJAWSKEEP,THELAST HORROiMADHOUSE M,MANSQNAMERICAN WERtjBENBLOOD BROTH?BLOODLINEBRIDE OF FRANKSCAT PEOPLECHILDREN OF THE FULL!CHRISTINECITY OF THE WALKING DEADCREEPSHOW ITUSDAWN OF THE DEAD WDEAD ZONE, THEDEMENTEDDON’T ANSWER THE PHONEDORM THAT DRIPPED BLOOD, THEDRACULA 0931}EXECUTIONER IJ/FROZEN SCREAMFIRESTARTERFRIDAY 13TH NEW BEGINNINGFRIDAY THS13TH,FRIDAY THE 13TH,GODZILLA VS. MEGALONHELL NIGHTHOUSE OF WAXHUSH, HUSH, SWEET CHARLOTTEINTRUDER WITHIN, THE BASKET CASEBLACKENSTIENBLOOD LEGACY8LOOOTIOECARRIECAULDRON OF BLOODCHILDREN OF THE CORNCHUD ^esforSEYOF THE 3RD KDREAMSCAPEMPIRE STRIKES BACKEXPLORERSFIRE AND ICE (ANIMATED)LIQUID SKVMARTtAN CHRONICLES 1MY SCIENCE PROJECTRUNAWAYSTAR TREK III; SEARCH FOR SPOCKSTAR WARSSUPERGIRLTHING SXO COMEIE MOVIEAL «K<gO STATESABRAINSTORMCATS EYECREATUREopen 7 days a weekmodel camera& video1342 East 55th St./493-6700Give us a call and we’ll send youour free brochure. It’ll take a bigload oft your mind. Moving Yourself?Before you decide to move yourself,check out North American Van Lines'WE-DRIVE program. The concept issimple: you pack, you load, and aprofessional North American VanLines' driver moves your belongings toyour new home in a custom-designed"air ride" van.You can still save money by doing partof the work yourself, and leavingthe hard part to us. It's theworry-free alternative to arent-a-truck move.You Load312/758-3000 (Suburbs)312/568-2694 (Chicago No.) northAmencan BA theUNIVERSITYorILLINOISATCHICAGOFull- and part-time Master of BusinessAdministration programs with 9specializations including MIS. Uniqueco-op work study program availablefor full-time students. Fully accreditedby AACSB.Contact:UIC MBA OfficeBox 4348, M/C 077Chicago, Illinois 60680(312) 996-457326—The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986CLASSIFIEDADVERTISINGClassified advertising in the Chicago Maroon is$2 for the first line and $1 for each additionalline. Lines are 45 characters long INCLUDINGspaces and punctuation. Special headings are20 character lines at $3 per line. Ads are not ac¬cepted over the phone, and they must be paidin advance. Submit all ads in person or by mailto The Chicago Maroon, 1212 E. 59th St.,Chicago IL 60637 ATTN Classified Ads. Our of¬fice is in Ida Noyes Rm. 304. Deadlines: Tues¬day & Friday at 5:0C p.m., one week prior topublication. Absolutely no exceptions will bemade! In case of errors for which the Maroonis responsible, adjustments will be made orcorrections run only if the business office isnotified WITHIN ONE CALENDAR WEEK ofthe original publication. The Maroon is notliable for any errors.SPACEAPARTMENTS AVAILABLEStudios, one, two & 3 bedrms some lake viewsnear 1C, CTA & U of O shuttle, laundry,facilities, parking available, heat & water in¬cluded. 5% discounts for students. HerbertRealty 684-23339-4:30 Mon. Fri. 9-2 on Sat.Beautiful stately apartment building located inthe most desireable area of Hyde Park. Lakeor city views available, only steps away fromthe beach, University Museum of Science andIndustry shopping center and 1C station.Decorator furnished and unfurnished newlyrenovated apartments. New wall to wallcarpeting, mirrored doors all util, includedstudio from $335. Laundry facilities and bikeroom. Advance Rentals-Kathleen 951-0540 752-4280.**FREE VCR OR MICROWAVE WITH REN¬TAL FREE**Condo for rent. 3’/2 rms. 56 & Kimbark. Fur¬nished Avail. May 1. or June 1 to Sept Hasdinette, faces backyards, very quiet. $400. 955-3920.APARTMENTS AVAILABLE5220-28 WOODLAWN4 Large Rooms $475Completely refurbished with tiled baths andrefinished tubs. Apts have burglar alarms.Laundry facilities on site. Call Nancy or Stevefor your personal showing.Parker-Holsman Company493-2525APARTMENTS AVAILABLE .5464-76 HARPER $325-440Studio, 3'/2 & 4 room apts. Partially or com¬pletely remodeled apts. Additional outlets,refinished tubs & floors. Completely painted insome cases. New kitchen sinks & cabinets.Laundry facilities on site. Only four left foryour personal showing. Call 493-2525 For Nancy or Steve. PAR KE R-HOLSMAN COMPANY.Female, prof/grad student, non-smoker, look¬ing for same to find and share 2br apt. Leavemessage. Diane 883 0295.Large 2’/2 Room Studio Apt. Vicinity Co-OpShopping Center $270.00 4/1 ADULTS NOPETS 764-2493.One bdr, available immediately 8300 Southrecently painted, carpet available. Call 224-2684 day or evening.NEED APT. FOR FALL? Take over our leaseand sublet to us this summer. 1 br. + sunporch,3 blks from quads, $380/mo. Call 752-3848.Lge. 3 bdrm avail, around 7-1 or 8-1 5412-14 In-gleside. $650. Clean, quiet, non-smkg, grad,stud. pref. 667-5153 or 684-8596 (Mrs. Irving)53RD AND KIMBARK4 Room-1 Bedrm. Condo For Rent. Newlydecorated. Hardwood floors. Modern kitchen.$500 per mth. Call Nancy or Steve^RKER-HOLSMAN COMPANY 493-2525SPACE WANTEDWorking adult desires 2 bdrm apt in So. HydePark to rent. Willing to sublet with option tobuy. Excellent references. Eves. 955-7998.GRAND SELL OUTHyde Park Manor Condominiums5135 S. Kenwood Ave.OPEN HOUSE &Champaign BrunchSunday 11-58.8% fixed rate loans•Duplex Units-2BR 2BA from $55,000•Convertible Studio - $30,000• Full Amenitieslll! — Parking,—Hospitality Room—Sauna, Exercise RoomAdventure Group 280-7878 PEOPLE WANTEDStudents to work in the 9 week program at theHyde Park Neighborhood Club, 5480 Kenwood.For work in day camp or p^eteen activities.Arts and crafts skills or athletic skills helpful.Experience preferred. Call Marie Carr, 643-4062.ARE YOU COLOR BLIND? People with colorvision defects needed for experiments. Willpay $5 for screening test and additional moneyif selected to participate in color perception ex¬periments. Call 962-1987.INTERNATIONAL STUDENTS: Recentlypublished, A Step By Step Guide To GreencardFrom F/J/H/Visas. For Free details sendrefundable $1.00 (postage & handling), Im¬migration Publications, Dept-Fl61 PO Box515991, Dallas, TX 75251.Dancers needed for FOTA dance. Any levelCall 493-6940.Prof/Alum on sabbatical leave seeks im¬mediate assistance of an elementary clericalnature. Flex hrs. and days, work to be done inRegenstein and Hyde Park Blvd. Apartmentspring quart, maybe summer period. 10 hrs.wk. Estimate$5 hr. Call anytime643 8435.CAMP WAYNE Coed, Northeastern Penn¬sylvania, 6/24-8/822. On campus interviewsApril 14, 10-12 Noon. Sign up Reynolds Club 200.General counselors and specialists for ail landSports, Water Activities, Computers,Photography, Camping and Fine Arts. Write:570 Broadway, Lyn Brook, NY 11563, 516-599-4562.RENTAL AGENTLuxury Hi-rise in Hyde Park requires a part-time Rental Agent. Please call 288-5050 between 9:00AM - 5:00PM, Monday through Fri¬day.Males needed for color vision experiment. Youwill be paid $10 for IV2-2 hours of your time.The experimental task is easy to perform. Youcan choose to do either one long session or twoshort sessions. Call Bill Swanson at the EyeResearch Labs, 962-1987.Bookkeeper/Receptionist medical eye centerat Woodlawn Hospital. Part-time acceptable.325-5200.Security guard. Full time summer. 11 PM to7AM Study on the job. Starts May 25th. CallJim at 667-7021.MATH TUTORS WANTED for advanced highschool student studying pre-calculus $10/hr642-9269.Therapy Assts. wanted to work July-midAugust Apply in person at Chgo Clinic for ChildDevelopment, 1525 E. 53rd Suite 1003.Preschool teacher with experience & creden¬tials, part-time begin Sept. Send resume to G.Stern, H. P. Union Nursery, 5600 Woodlawn60637.PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS NEEDED. TheMaroon seeks 2 students to work on Monday orThurs. nights on ad or editorial layout. Musthave car-mileage reimbursed. Experiencepreferred but not a must. Apply Ida Noyes 3049-5.SERVICESJUDITH TYPES and has a memory. Phone955-4417.LARRY'S MOVING & DELIVERY. Furnitureand boxes. Household moves. Cartons, tape,padding dolly available. 743-1353.UNIVERSITY TYPING SERVICEWordprocessing and EditingOne block from Regenstein LibraryJames Bone, 363-0522PASSPORT PHOTOS WHILE-U-WAITModel Camera & Video 1342 E. 55th St. 493-6700.JUDITH TYPES and has a memory IBM com¬patible. Quiet Writer printer. Your disk ormine. Phone 955-4417.Typing Typing Typing: Dissertation ThesisTables etc. Grammar correct Call Elaine 667-8657.TRISH indexes and abstracts: Papers,reports, Journals, books. 955 9166.Does your resume describe you or a dead icon?Call for help, 684 4485. Will review cover lettersalso.BABYSITTING- I am a graduate student'swife. I babysit in my home full or part-time(weekends and evenings, too) references andexperience 324-3125 (after 6 pm).WANTEDUsed 5 speed women's bicycle. Call eves. 6431568.PSYCHOTHERAPYGROUPS FOR WOMENOpening in psychotherapy group composed ofgraduate students professional women. Issuesrelated to personal growth, relationships, andachievement. Screening interview, no charge.Mary E Hallowitz MSW CSW ACSW 947-0154. TURKISH CARPETSTURKISH CARPETS AND KEUMS atreasonable prices. 955-1225 evenings.EDWARDO'SHOT STUFFEDDelivered right to your door! Edwardo's- Thesuperstars of stuffed pizza. Open late everynight. Call 241-7960-1321 E. 57th St. 241-7960.LOOKING FOR A JOB?PRODUCTION ASSISTANTS NEEDED. TheMaroon seeks 2 students to work on Monday orThurs. nights on ad or editorial layout. Musthave car-mileage reimbursed. Experiencepreferred but not a must. Apply Ida Noyes 3049-5.PIANO LESSONSSPRING PAINO LESSONS with EdwardMondello Teacher of piano music dept. 1960-1980 Tel. 752-4485.KUNDALIN1 YOGAPowerful Techniques for Health, Joy, Peace inbody, Mind, Spirit. Tues & Thurs, 5-6:30, IdaTISSUE CULTURE TECHPermanent fulltime tissue culture technicianneeded IMMEDIATELY. Challenging andresponsible position. Prior experience ad¬vantageous but not absolutely required. In¬teractions with people; must be organized andreliable. Recommendations required. To applycall 962-1896.ARE YOU ADIS*CRIMINATING PERSON?If so, you can earn approximately $200 for par¬ticipating in a research study to determinewhether you can discriminate between the ef¬fects of one drug and another. No injections orexperimental drugs are involved. Minimumtime is required Volunteers must be between21 and 35 years old and in good health. Formore information call Karen at 962-3560weekdays between 8:30 & 11:30 a.m. Refer tostudy N.SEEKINGTREATMENTFOR ANXIETYSelected volunteers will receive 6 weeks of freetreatment for anxiety at the University ofChicago Medical Center in return for par¬ticipating in a 3 week study to evaluate drugpreference. Involves only commonly-prescribed drugs. Participants must be bet¬ween 21 & 55 years old and in good health. Forfurther information call Karen at 962-3560 bet¬ween 8:30 & 11:30 a.m. Refer to study A.CONCERNEDABOUTYOUR WEIGHT?We are looking for people who are concernedabout their weight (and overweight) to par¬ticipate in a study to evaluate drug preferenceand mood. Earn $150 for your participation inthis 4 week study. No experimental drugs andminimal time involved. Volunteers must bebetween 21 & 35 years old and in good health.For further information call Karen between8:30-11:30 a.m. at 962-3560. Refer to study WFOR SALEDatsun 1980 Hatchback runs great. Newclutch, recent tires & complete brakes. Mustsell, Ivg. city. 955-3920 Try bet 9am aft 9pm.2 BEDROOM COOP FOR SALE3 blocks from campus, formal dining & livingrooms, modern kitchen, bath. Hardwoodfloors, fenced yard, rear deck. Kids & petswelcome. Ideal first home $40004- tax deduc¬tions for 1985. Terrific buy at $8500 +$549/month. Call 752-0487UofC dinner plates (mint) circa 1931 SpodeEckart Swift Bond Snell Hitchcock HarperHull etc, picture on each plate $35 Goodman753 8342.Marshal Field's sealy queen size mattress andbox spring. Only 9 months old Good shapeOriginally $600. Will sell at $250 or best offer.Call 643 7850 early mornings or evenings.Act Now! DiskettesBulk S'A" DS/DD. 49 cents each. Lots of 50These are not 2nds. MONEY BACKGUARANTEE. No questions asked Call MEI,1 800-634 3478, 9-9 est M-F, 10-6 Sat Offer ex¬pires 5/15/86Rummage Sale Sat., April 5, 9am-4pm St.Thomas Apostle School 5457 S. Woodlawn. -M-DELICIOUS-M-NUTRITIOUS-H-!-EXPEDITIOUSThe Medici on 57th delivers every menu itemfast and fresh! Try our new spinach pizza, it'ssecond to none. 667-7394.SSS&FUNPeople needed to participate in studies oflanguage processing, reasoning, and memoryWill be paid $4-5 per session. Call 962 8859 between 8:30 and noon to register.APARTMENTWANTEDOne bedroom or studio wanted near campus.Must allow dog and have fenced-in backyardfor same. Call Larry at 684-6788 or 962-9555.LOX! BAGELS!Hillel has a brunch on Sundays 11 to 1pm at5715 S Woodlawn. Lox, bagel & cream cheeseplus Sunday Trib, NY Times, coffee, tea & OJ.All for $2. There will be no brunches the lasttwo weeks of April due to passover.CHOCOLATE SOUP CAFEWelcomes Spring with live entertainment andrefreshments Saturday night 10pm to 12 mid¬night Hillel House 5715 S. Woodlawn.SEVEN MEMBERSof the Morila Family performing LIVE atChocolate Soup Cafe this Saturday 10pm tomidnite. South African Music. Refreshmentsserved. At Hillel 5715 S. Woodlawn.LOOKING FORAN APARTMENTCome to REYNOLDS CLUB North lounge onMonday APRIL 7 at 7pm to find out HOW TOFINE ONE!LANGUAGE COURSESare offered to all Graduate Students throughthe Committee on Academic Cooperation atthe Lutheran School of Theology inFRENCH * GERMAN * LATIN * SPANISHFor further information and registration callinstructor or Program Coordinator: SuzanneSchafer 493-4350. See specific ads below. ,FRENCH COURSESBEGINNING READING FOR EXAM PREP.Time to be arranged, beg. Mo, Apr. 7, 7pm,Room 205. Fee: $125. Call: ConstanceGreenleaf, 955-4783ADVANCED FRENCH GRAMMAR,READING, CONVERSATION (also for examprep) Time: Mo 6:30-8:30Pm, beg. Mo, Apr. 7.Room 206. Fee: $125. Call Silva Tokatlian 753-3553.GERMAN COURSESBEGINNING READING FOR EXAM PREP.Time: We 7-8 pm, Fr 2-4 pm, beg. We, Apr. 7.Room 203. Fee: $240. Call: Suzanne Schafer493-4350.ADVANCED READING (5 week intensiveclass) Time: to be arranged, beg. We, Apr. 2,5pm. Room 205. Fee: $125. Call: MatthewHeinzelman 285-2283.LATIN COURSESBEGINNING LATIN. Time: Mo/We 7-9 pm,beg. Mo, Apr. 7. Room 203. Fee: $240. CallJerome Parrish 978-4873.INTERMEDIATE LATIN. Time: Tu/Th 4-6pm, beg. Mo, Apr. 7, 5 pm. Room 205. Fee:$240. Call Jerome Parrish 978-4873.ADVANCED READING. Time: once or twicea week depending on interest, beg. Mo, Apr. 7,7pm. Room 203. Fee: $240. Call: Kathy Krug643-5436SPANISHCOURSESADVANCED READING FOR EXAM PREP (5week intensive class) Time: Tu/Th 6-8 pm,beg Tu, Apr 8. Room 203. Fee: $125. Call:James Savolainen 241-6358BEGINNING CONVERSATIONAL II. Time:We 6:30-8:30 pm, beg, We, Apr. 9. Room 303.Fee: $125. Call Sonia Csaszar 493-7251.INTERMEDIATE CONVERSATION. Time:Th 7-9 pm, beg. Th, Apr. 10. Room 203, Fee:$125. Call: Sonia Csaszar 493 7251.PROGRAMMER ANALYSTThe computing Services Department of theGraduate School of Business at the Universityof Chicago is looking for an experienced programmer/analyst to design and implementnew administrative systems on VAX computers. Requirements: Extensive experiencewith VAX/VMS Capable of Coding in C and/orFortran Language. Knowledge of relationalDBMS. To apply, send resume to:Computing ServicesUniversity of ChicagoGraduate School of Business1101 E. 58th StreetChicago, IL 60637The Chicago Maroon—Friday, April 4, 1986—27Juanita says—“Check out our all newCamera Department.Now.”KODAK VR35, MODEL K10 TWO FOR ONE on KODAK Filmprocessing. Don’t trust yourpictures to anything else! OLYMPUS MODEL S CAMERA CASEList Price: $60.00 Our Price $48.00OLYMPUS BILORA TRIPOD, MODEL 75-1List Price $69.95 Our Price: $43.95List Price: $129.95Our Price: $99.95OLYMPUS TRIP AFList Price: $160.00Our Price: $119.95 • Auto focus Includes Canon U.S.A., Inc.• Film winding & rewinding one-year limited warranty/• Exposure coupling range registration card.• Programmed shutter• Built-in flashCANON SPRINTList Price: $160.00Our Price: $129.95Something good just got better.Along with the prompt, friendly service you’ve come toexpect, we’re adding a whole new line of affordable camerasand equipment! We’re celebrating with fantastic prices oncameras, film processing, and accessories; you owe it toyourself to stop by soon!Say “Juanita sent me? and receive anadditional $5.00 off on any camera on sale!nr.970 East 58th Street • Chicago, Illinois 60637 • (312) 962-8729Normally at this time of year Grey City publishes a humorous issue forApril Fool’s Day. Another occasion, however, seems more important forus to commemorate at this time—today is the eighteenth anniversary ofthe assassination of Martin Luther King. Although the Civil Rightsmovement made great strides under his able leadership, we feel that thework of that movement is not completed, and that the invocation of Dr.King’s memory is as relevant now as ever. Insidious and blatant racism,and segregation that is legally forbidden but economically, politically, andsocially enforced, still plague our supposedly egalitarian country (and our city, and our community, and our school). As we are all aware, ourUniversity partakes, through its fiscal investments, in one of the mostbrutal and horrific incarnations of racism the world has ever known, inapartheid-Xorn South Africa. Perhaps fewer of us are aware that Dr. Kinghimself was a pioneer of the anU-apartheid movement and the struggle fordivestment in the early sixties, before most people had ever heard ofapartheid. It is only when we are mindful of what is yet to be done, that weunderstand the value of what he did; with the utmost gravity and sinceritywe dedicate this issue to the memory of Dr. King. *************"*"****REMEMBERING KING:by M. M. MalloyWhen asked to contribute to this edition of Grey City Journal, one thingcame to mind: Use this opportunity to reach young people.Dr. Rev. Martin Luther King Jr.The Doctor: After receiving his BA fron Morehouse College in 1948, hereceived his BD from Crozer Theological Seminary in 1951, and in 1955 heearned his PhD from Boston University.The Reverend: He was ordained a Baptist minister in 1947 and becamean Assistant Pastor of Ebenezer Baptist Church, the church his grand¬father founded in 1894, and the church his father was pastored over since1931.The Junior: Martin was the second child, the first boy, born to his fatherMartin Luther King Sr. in 1929.Why is it that the makers of African American History are unknown bythe generation of African Americans who are in high school andelementary school today? Those who do not know their history aredoomed to releat the mistakes of the past.“Teach thv children!” “Teach the children!” Culture, history, andknowledge enriches lives. We must maintain our legends, heros, andvalues to in King’s words: “offset this cultural homocide, (we) must riseup with an affirmation of his own Olympian manhood.” (Where Do We GoFrom Here: Chaos of Community).We, as a people, must be responsible for learning about the ac¬complishments and contributions of Africans and African Americans. Whoare you without knowledge of self? In King’s words: “Psychologicalfreedom, a firm sense of self-esteem, is the most powerful weapon againstthe long night of physical slavery. The (African American) will only be trulyfree when he reaches down to the inner depths of his own being and signswith the pen and ink of assertive selfhood his own emancipationproclamation. As long as the mind is enslaved the body can never befree.” (Where Do We Go From Here: Chaos or Community.)King is but one of our heros. Please, please take the time andenergy to learn about Martin Luther King Jr., and all the heros of Africanand African American History. Become responsible for the destiny of ourpeople. . ♦ •»AFRICAN AMERICAN HEROA AAAAAAAAAAVAVAVAVA^VA^VAVAVAVAby Terry TurnerFaculty for Divestment from South Africaformed during Spring Quarter 1985, to workwith all sectors of the University community fora change in the University’s policy of investingin firms that do business in South Africa. Werepresent a broad spectrum of departments inthe humanities, natural sciences, social sci¬ences, and the professional schools. Our pri¬mary goal is divestment, which we feel is theonly morally defensible policy under presentconditions. As teachers, some of whom haveexpertise in various aspects of the South Af¬rican question, we have worked towards thisgoal primarily by attempting to promote dis¬cussion and raise the level of awareness ofother faculty, students, administrators and trus¬tees of the complex issues surrounding dives¬tment.We have done this in several ways. Weorganized a Teach In in October ’85 in whichnumerous faculty, students, outside speakers,and President Gray participated. A petitiondrive for a faculty ad in the Maroon calling fordivestment, published in the same week as theTeach In, attracted some 250 faculty sign¬atures In Fall ’85 and Winter ’86, we initiated aseries of talks in student dormitories on SouthAfrica, which have been successful and well attended.We also held a series of talks with PresidentGray and the Trustees. These included ameeting with President Gray in November, ameeting with Kenneth West, Chairman of theTrustees, in January, and another meeting withMr. West and three other Trustees of theExecutive Board, empowered to represent theBoard as a whole, on March 31. It has to besaid that while these talks have permitted anexchange of views, they have led to no sign ofwillingness on the part of either President Grayor the Trustees to modify University policytoward investing in firms that invest in SouthAfrica, or indeed to discuss seriously the critt-c ;;m of this policy or the arguments for dives¬tment that have been put forward by the FDSArepresentatives. In spite of our best efforts atopening and pursuing a dialogue, and in spiteof the overwhelming evidence and argumentspresented by the speakers in the Public Policyworkshop on divestment over the past twoquarters (most of whom have argued for dives¬tment), the position of the President and Trus¬tees on divestment seems, if anything, to havehardened into intrasigence. There has beenneither change nor even the hint of the pos¬sibility of change, nor any attempt at seriousengagement with the main arguments fordivestment that have been presentedGiven the futility of our experience of directdialogue with President Gray, and the trustees, FDSA feels that it is vital that the Faculty as awhole, rather than merely our own group, havethe opportunity to make its voice heard on thedivestment question. To this end. we havecirculated a petition for a meeting of the fullUniversity Senate (all academic faculty exceptfirst-year non-tenured members) to consider,and vote on, a motion for divestment. Thisreceived the signatures of the required 10% tooblige President Gray to call the meeting, whichshe has accordingly done (this is only thesecond time such a meeting has been called inthe history of the University). The proportion ofsignatures on our petition has since risen tonearly 20%. This figure alone attests to thewide support for divestment among the faculty,and we feel vindicates FDSA’s claim to havebeen speaking all along for a significant prop-oration of the faculty as a whole. The SenateMeeting will be held from 4:30 to 6:30 pm onApril 29The Senate vote will not by itself achievedivestment. It will have no binding effect on theinvestment of the Trustees It will, however, weare confident, stand as a clear and powerfulsignal to President Gray, the Trustees, and thepublic at large that the Faculty of this Universityrejects the present policy of the President andTrustees as indefensible on moral, fiduciary, orany other grounds. By making it impossible forthe President to represent her policy as reflect¬ing a consensus of the faculty, and publicly registering massive opposition to that policy,the vote will contribute to creating a context inwhich neither President Gray nor the trusteescan continue to ignore the moral and financialconsiderations which are leading increasingnumbers of institutions of all kinds to withdrawtheir funds from companies involved with SouthAfrica.Whatever happens in the Senate April-29, weface a long and difficult struggle for divestmentat the U. of C. Success can come only throughcooperation among faculty, students, and staff,both as individuals and as organizations (suchas those that have joined together in therecently formed U. of C. Coalition for Divest¬ment). FDSA pledges its solidarity and cooper¬ation with staff and students engaged in thestruggle, and is already working actively with anumber of such groups and individuals. It is astruggle to which we have no choice but tocommit ourselves. Its primary motivation, thesituation in South Africa, will not go away; giventhe intrasigence of the South African regime itis likely that the situation will continue todeteriorate. The suffering and the resistence ofthe oppressed and exploited people of SouthAfrica must accordingly be expected to in¬tensify, and with them our sense of our owncollective responsibility for making the onegesture within our power as a University tocontribute to the pressure against the apartheidregime: Divest Now!ttltl FACULTY MEMBERS DEMAND DIVESTMENT $%%%FIRST MEETING FORSPRING ISSUEMONDAY, APRIL 7, 7 PMIDA NOYES 303 □ OFFCOLOR SALEMARCH 16 thru APRIL 30HighlightingCellophaneGlazingJazzingLuminizing Family Styling CenterNOW FEATURING!!THE INDOOR TANNING SYSTEM1621 E. 55TH STREET __,0CHICAGO, IL 60615 <312) 241-7778TheAdditional Hair Coloring services areavailable or can be designed to achieve yourdesired effect Ask your designer tor aFREE color consultation' WW '-y- wFmmFINE CATERINGWhere the emphasis is on good food,from hors d’oeuvres & dinnersto barbeques & box lunches.Mark BiresFormer Catering Director of Hyde Park Cafes.Craig HalperFormer Head Chef of Jimmy’s Place.(Chicago Magazine Dining Poll Winner)3 1 2.6 6 7.4 6 0 0UNIVERSITY TRAVELIN THE HYDE PARK BANK BLDG.SUITE #5011525 E. 53rd St., ChicagoSUMMER SPECIALS•TO FLORIDA, THE CARIBBEAN, MEXICO, EUROPE•SKI PACKAGES -HOTEL RESERVATIONS•CRUISES #CAR RENTALSSTUDENT TRAVEL SPECIALISTS•DISCOUNT AIR FARES •YOUTH HOSTEL INFORMATION•CHARTERS •TOUR PACKAGES•EURAIL PASSESWE SPECIALIZE IN FINDING LOW FARES FOR DOMESTIC AND INTERNA TIONAL TRIPSMaria A. Spinelli667-6900HOURS: WEEKDA YS 9:00 AM 6:00 PM; SA TURD A Y 9:00 AM 4:00 PMISTvtiPuebhFINE MEXICAN CUISINE2908 W. 59th 737-2700Open 1 ’ an- to it PnRECOMMENDED BY.. .Chicago Tnbune 84 Tempo 84Chicago Magazine - June 85 & Chicago Sun-Times July 85Our Specialties and Yours Too• ENCHILADAS MOL E • OUR SOMBRERO• AVAL,ADO TACOSDine OutsideOn Our RatiosMi Pueblo is a Special Find^ ,7Guitarist Will fcnte'tam OnWednesdays Thursdays & TudavsOurMargaritasAreMagic!INVI K J2—FRIDAY, APRIL 4, 1986 GREY CITY JOURNAL Fish are your friends.Don’t throw trash in their home.Give a hoot.Don’t pollute.Forest Service, U.S.D.A.THEATERAudition* for the annual King Richard’sFaire in Bristol, Wisconsin and Bostonwill be held Monday fron noon to 9 pmand Tuesday from 6 pm to 10 pm at theTheater Building, 1125 W. Belmont.Casting is for productions as well as forjugglers, mimes, musicians, and generalgood-time type revlers. I’ve been to twoof these ’’Faires", and they’re a lot offun to be a part of. If you have any ofthese talents (don’t rule out your mud¬eating prowess!), and you have a littlespare time over the summer, go for it. Aphoto and resume are required. Ap¬pointments (not required) can be madeby calling 395-5700.Happy Days by Samuel Beckett. A Beckettplay called Happy Days? I don’t believeit either. Previews April 4-11. opens Apr.14 and runs thru May 11 at theGoodman Theatre, 200 S. Columbus443-3800.Split Second by Dennis McIntyre. A blackcop shoots his bigoted, hot-temperedwhite prisoner and tries to cover it up,but must cope with his action in thecourse of the play. I’ve read about thisand it seems like an interesting play —especially for this city. Thru May 11 atthe Victory Gardens Theater, 2257 N.Lincoln. 871-3000.Lydie Breeze by John Guare. Apparently asequel to an earlier play where Lydieand friends try to create a private ut¬opia. It seems they failed — Lydiedoesn’t even appear in this play havingcommitted suicide. Cheery enough forya? Opens Sun. at the SteppenwolfTheatre Company, 2851 N. Halsted.472-4141Chicago International Theatre FestivalDon’t forget! This first-time fest is run¬ning April 28-May 5, featuring theaterfrom Great Britain, Japan, Israel, Spain,and Italy, as well as showcasing localtheater. Now is a good time to takeadvantage of all this great theater in thecity. The Chicago Public Library is alsoholding lectures and roundtables duringthe festival. Information on the Festivalcan be obtained by calling 664-FEST;information on the lectures and round¬tables (which are free) is available at theChicago Public Library.MUSICJames Brown Catch big Jim with Yarb¬rough & Peoples at the Holiday StarTheater tomorrow night for two shows, 7& 10:30. I-65 and US 30, Merrillville,Indiana, 734-7266Chaka Khan Chaka wilt perform right afterthe Bulls game (that’s right—after thebasketball game) at the ChicagoStadium tomorrow night, 1800 W Madi¬son, 853-3636.Ozzy Osbourne A heavy show with Metal-lica at the UIC Pavillion tomorrow nightfor one show at 8, Harrison and Racine,996-0460The Turtles Appearing with Flo & Eddie atthe Park West tonight for two shows,7:30 & 11, 21 and over only, 322 WArmitage, 559-1212.Alan Holdsworth With Jerry Goodman &Friends Sun at the Park West for oneshow at 8, 322 W Armitage. 559-1212.Echo & The Bunnymen At the AragonBallroom with special guest The ChurchWed night at 7:30.Leon Redbone Leon will be strummin andhummin at the Vic tomorrow night at 9,$13 advance/S 15 showdate, 3145 NSheffield, 472-0366Osborne Bros. Catch the legends at theOld Town School of Folk Music tomor¬row night at 7:30 & 10, 909 W Armitage,525-7793Tower of Power If you’re into powerfulbrass funk check out the re-opening ofthe Cubby Bear Lounge tomorrow night,two shows, 9 & 11:30, Clark and Ad¬dison, 327-1662.DANCEJan Erkert and Dancers are teachingcourses in Modern, Ballet, Jazz, andAerobics. Registration all this week. In¬ternational House, 1414 E 59, 753-2274Osgood Dances, Inc. and Kate Kuper,Inc. In concert: Amy Osgood and KateKuper combine their talent and energyfor the first time in a concert program ofnew and recent work. Osgood Danceswill present the Chicago premiere ofLove Among Machines, Kate Kuper willpremiere a solo choreographed by MaryWard entitled Run, precious, run, andreprise Slicks & Curves Ms Osgoodand Ms. Kuper will also perform to¬gether in a new co-choreographed work.At MoMing, 1034 W Barry Fri thru Fri,472-8994, $9/$8 students and s.c.Mime Festival; The Unicom Mime En¬semble. featuring mime artist Robert C.Carleton, and musicians Joseph Krowkaand Richard Goodreau, will offer a totalaudio-visual experience. The ensemble’sprimary objective is to convey emotionaland intellectural messages through Ozzy Osbourns, thrust to Amsrtesn youth.broad comedy, cutting satire, and poig¬nant drama. Feno will present a fast-paced, spellbinding show that will in¬clude mime, juggling, acrobatics, break¬dancing, magic and music, along withunicycling and rollerskating. Partners inMime, Karen Hoyer, Carol DeLong, andElizabeth Tabler, will offer silent andmusically scored numbers reflecting theconflicts of relationships between part¬ners. At the Chicago Public Library Cul¬tural Center, 78 E Washington, Sat from2-4 pm, 346-3278.WOMEN Chos Krtosr, TMs Sword CMs ThroughLibrary. tonorsnes, 1M4, at CMcafo PubicFrank Barsottt, Unttttod, 1M4, at Chicago Public Library.ing? Thurs at 8:30 pm.House. $2 — BT InternationalPhyllis Bramson Thirteen years of(Imagist-type) paintings, constructions,really eerie doll-like sculptures. ThruApril 20, at the Renaissance Society, 4thfloor Cobb, 5811 Ellis. Tues-Fri. 10-4,Sat-Sun 12-4.Barnett Newman Retrospective at theSmart Gallery, 5550 Greenwood. Tues-Fri 10-4, Sat-Sun 12-4Mira! The Second Canadian Club HispanicArt Tour, in its midwestern debut. ThruApril 26 at the Hyde Park Art Center,1701 E 53rd. Tues-Sat. 11-5Ruth Willett: A Future at the SourceSculptural installation utilizing branches,found objects from nature, by a recentgrad of our MFA program. Showingconcurrently are mixed media works byAnne Farley Gaines, assemblages byMarilyn Schulenburg, paintings byConstance Cavan, and photographs byMargaret Peterson All shows opentoday with a reception from 5-8 pm, andrun thru April 26, at ARC Gallery, 356 WHuron. 2667607Artists Spaces Collaborate Group install¬ation project by Mark Packer, JimPallas, Carl Toth, and Ellen Wilt Show¬ing concurrently are paintings by MaryJones Opening today with a receptionfrom 5-8 pm, and running thru April 26,at Artemisia Gallery, 341 W Superior.Tues-Sat 11-5.The Greatest Good Collaborative art byPeter Taub and Dave Kelly Openstoday with a reception from 610 pm,and runs thru May 10, at Bedrock Gal¬lery, 1550 Milwaukee Fri, 1*5, Sat-Sun12-5.Zush One flashy Spanish abstract painter,new works Opens today with a recep¬tion from 67:30 pm. at Phyllis KindGaliery, 313 W SuperiorPhotography at the Bauhaus Photogra¬phy hasn’t been the same since, actu¬ ally. Thru April 18 at the Goethe In¬stitute, 401 N Michigan. Mon-Wed andFri, 11-5:30, and Thurs 1-8Oblique Delusion Computer graphic artistRick Paul has created a contemporaryTrojan Horse/figurative installation. ThruMay 12 at the Cultural Center, 78 EWashington. Mon-Thurs, 9-6, Fri, 9-6,and Sat. 9-5 Latent Images: Ten Midwestern Photo¬graphers Winners of a new photographyfellowship: Frank A. Barsotti, SteverBenson, Andrew Boroweic, Ron GeibertMichael Goss, Richard Gray, CharlesKrider, Anthony M laouro, FredrikMarsh, and Jay P. Wolke At the Cul¬tural Center, as aboveGrey City Journal 4 April 86Staff: Steven K. Amsterdam, Abigail Asher, Steve Best. Heather Blair, MicheleDonnarens, Jeff Brill, Carole Byrd, Gideon D’Arcangelo, Frederick Dolan, AnjaliFedson, Dierdre Fretz, Justine Kalas, Irwin Keller, Stefan Kertesz. Bruce King,Mike Kotze, Nadine McGann, David McNulty, Miles Mendenhall, David Miller,Patrick Moxey, Brian Mulligan, Jordan Orlando, John Porter, Laura Rebeck,Geoffrey Rees, Max Renn, Paul Reubens, Laura Saltz, Rachel Saltz, SahotraSarkar, Ann Schaefer, Wayne Scott, Mark Toma, Bob Travis, Ann Whitney,Ken Wissoker, Rick WojcikProduction: Abigail Asher, Stephanie Bacon, Gideon D’Arcangelo, Bruce KingEditor Stephanie Bacon Feminist Radio Novelist Valerie Minerreads from her recent novel Winter'sEdge— a story of the friendship betweentwo elderly women in San Francisco’steeming Tenderloin District. Mon 5-6 pmWHPK 88.5 fm.Jean Swallow Reading Editor of Out FromUnder: Sober Dykes & Our Friends,author Jean Swallow will read from herforthcoming novel, Leave a Light on forMe, a novel about friendship, politicalstruggles, recovery, and love in a long¬term relationship. At Women and Chil¬dren First, 1967 N Halsted, Tues at 7:15pm, 440-8824.Sheila Jeffries Reading Historian Jeffrieswill talk about her new book, The Spin¬ster & Her Enemies: Feminism & Sex¬uality 1880-1930 and how campaignsaround issues of sexuality shaped theearly feminist movement. She will alsodiscuss how those and other sexualityissues relate to the contemporarymovement. At Women and ChildrenFirst, 1967 N Halsted, Wed at 7:15 pm,4468824Spring Dance Party Rockin' MarianeEngle-Cameron will be mixing the dancetunes at the first party of the springquarter. At International House, 1414 E59, tonight at 9 pm, 753-2274, $3/$1residents Complimentary beverages willbe served, soo noone under 21 will beadmitted.FILMBack to the Future (Robert Zemeckis,1985) DOC Fri at 7, 9:15, 11:30 pm.$2.50White Nights (Taylor Hackford, 1985) DOCSat at 7, 9:30, Midnight $2.50Amarcord (Federico Fellini, 1974) Basecon Fellini’s recollections of his youthspent in a small town in prewar Italy,Amarcord searches the mental land¬scapes of its inhabitants and with greatfanfare reveals the shortcomings thatpaved the way for Fascism AcademyAward for Best Foreign Film, 1974 Sunat 8:30 pm. International House $2.50— BTMetropolis (Fritz Lang, 1926) Lang deftlydepicted the political machinations inGermany in the 1920s. Upon seeing thisfilm in a small town Hitler remarked toGoebbels, so the story goes, that hewanted Lang to make Nazi pictures forhim; but was that what Lang was say-GREY CITY JOURNAL—FRIDAY, APRIL 4, 1986—3CASE FOR DIVESTMENT MADE PLAIN AND SIMPLEby Sahotra SarkarThere is one point on which the administra¬tion, the trustees of the University of Chicago,and the anti-apartheid activists on this campusare in complete agreement: that apartheidconstitutes a special moral evil in the worldtoday. Apartheid constitutes a special moral evilnot only because it is institutionalized racialoppression but also because of theextent anddegree of that oppression. By itself oppressionor discrimination on the basis of race is notobviously any worse than, for instance, opp¬ression or discrimination on the basis of gender(as practiced in most societies) or nationalorigin (as practiced against African, Asian, orCaribbean nationals in Britain). That this opp-ression under apartheid is in-stitutionalized—carefully enshrined in the SouthAfrican constitution—is important but in¬sufficient to make it special; the oppression ofwomen in many Islamic societies is just asinstitutionalized. What finally does makeapartheid special is that, along with thesefactors, the oppression perpetrated by it hasreached astronomical proportions.Africans in South Africa, more than 72% ofthe population, cannot vote and have no say innational politics. Other Black communities, theso-called ‘ Coloureds” and Indians have beengiven, and have almost universally rejected,token political participation. A vast array ofmacabre legislation, passed entirely by whites,restricts the movement and residence ofBlacks. Africans have to carry the hateddompass; Indians cannot live in Orange FreeState. Africans can own only 13% of the land.All Blacks are brutally relocated wheneverwhites, for whatever reason, choose to enc¬roach upon their land. In the last fifteen years,more than 4 million Blacks (over 15% of thecurrent Black population) have been forciblyresettled. The litany of horrors is endless.This political order is maintained by the mostbrutal police and security system in the worldtoday. Last year over 1500 Blacks were killedduring anti-apartheid protests, almost all ofthem by the police and military. Imprisonment,detention without trial, and torture are com¬monplace. The apartheid regime has evendeveloped unique means of, political per¬secution; by banning a person, apartheidsilences an opponent, making it illegal for themedia to quote or mention that person. Veryoften the security police, after beating or apply¬ing electric shocks to the genitalia, furthertorture a prisoner by suspending her/him byone leg and then rotating the body: the processhas been christened, in apartheid jargon, “thehelicopter”.Political oppression, of course, translates intoand depends upon economic oppression. SouthAfrica is among the top 7 food exporters in theworld, exporting the equivalent of $1 billioneach year. Meanwhile, on the average, about50,000 African (roughly 2% of the Africanpopulation) die of malnutrition every year. Infantmortality among whites averages 12/1000, oneof the lowest in the world. In rural areas, wheremost African women live, it averages 282/1000, towards the other end of the internationalspectrum. Apartheid prevents migrant Blacklaborers from bringing their families to theirplace of employment. These laborers often seetheir families for only a week each year. Forcedto live in separation, families often collapse.Meanwhile white South Africa enjoys one of thehighest living standards in the world.1The administration and the trustees of theUniversity of Chicago recognize apartheid as aspecial moral evil. Otherwise they would nothave adopted (at least in principle thoughapparently not in practice) a policy of investingin companies doing business in South Africaonly if these companies adhere to the SullivanPrinciples.2 Anti-apartheid activists on campusalso obviously recognize apartheid as a specialmoral evil. Otherwise, in spite of their highlydiverse political perspectives, they would nothave united to organize against apartheid. Inspite of this initial agreement, the positionsadvocated by the two sides remain diametric¬ally opposed. The anti-apartheid activists sug¬gest that the University immediately divest itselfof all its holdings in banks and companies thatdo business in South Africa. The administrationand trustees refuse: what follows here is anattempt to analyze this dispute and to establishfirmly the case for total divestment.In suggesting that the University divest itselfof its holdings in such companies, anti-apartheid activists are not arguing that theUniversity divest simply because the SouthAfrican stocks are tainted Such an argumentignores the possibility that divestment anddisinvestment might have negative conse¬quences for the victims of apartheid. Furtherthe University’s trustees do have a moralobligation not to harm the financial health of theUniversity. It is, therefore, up to the proponentsof divestment to show (i), total divestment is aneffective way to bring about the downfall ofapartheid; (ii), that the victims of apartheidapprove of the consequences of divestmentand, (iii), that divestment can be carried outwithout destroying the financial health of theUniversity.The end of apartheid means the politicalempowerment of Black South Africans on thesame level as whites In other words nothingshort of a one person-one vote political system is acceptable as satisfactory political change inSouth Africa. In order to achieve this end, allfactors that contribute to the maintenance ofapartheid must be forced to change. US com¬panies in South Africa contribute significantly tothe maintenance and extension of apartheid.US corporate investment in South Africa totalsmore than 2.6 billion. The importance of foreigncapital to South Africa cannot be over¬estimated. The Financial Mail (Johannesburg)observed January 18, 1985: “In the absence ofwindfall gains from booming commodity mar¬kets, South Africa has only one source fromwhich the capital necessary for development ofthe economy can be derived. That is directforeign investment.”3 Former prime minister,John Vorster, put it even more bluntly: “Eachtrade agreement, each bank loan, each newinvestment is another brick in the wall of ourcontinued existence.”4Moreover, US companies are crucial for thesurvival of apartheid because of the type oftechnology they offer. The only natural resourcein which South Africa is lacking in oil. It hascoal reserves that contain 2.5 times as muchenergy as Saudi Arabia, and the US FluorCorporation currently has a $4.2 billion contractto build another oil-from-coal plant, therebyputting South Africa even further on its path toself-sufficiency and total immunity from inter¬national pressure.5 General Motors and Fordsell vehicles to the police and military. Onethird of IBM’s business is with the regime.Control Data and Hewlett-Packard sell com¬puters to the state. Meanwhile US authorJames North observes: “. . . the computer is ascharacteristic a tool of apartheid as thesjambok (pronounced sham-bok), the animalhide whip the police still use and venerate.”6Mobil, Exxon, and Caltex sell South African oil.US companies control 70% of the computermarket, 44% of the oil market, and 33% of theautomobile market. US companies have nocontrol over how their goods and services areused by the South Africans. Further, the Na¬tional Supplies Procurement Act (No. 89 of1970) and the Armaments Development andProduction Act (No. 57 of 1968) to give theapartheid regime broad powers to order com¬panies to sell any goods it wants and to keepthe sale secret (even from the stockholders ofthe company). Failure to comply with either ofthese provisions is punishable by ten yearsimprisonment. Even a US Senate foreign rela¬tions committee report in 1978 stated: “The neteffect of American investment has been tostrengthen the economic and military self-sufficiency of South Africa’s apartheid regime,undermining the fundamental goals and objec¬tives of US foreign policy.”7 Further, by theirmere presence, these companies provide legi¬timacy to apartheid South Africa.It seems clear, then, that the withdrawal ofUS companies from South Africa—a processcalled divestment—would seriously underminethe survival of apartheid unless other foreigncompanies take their place. There is no evi¬dence that they would. The investment climatein South Africa has deteriorated so much thatnew investment, with capital outlay, is notconsidered profitable. Business EnvironmentRisk Information (BERI) S.A., a Geneva-basedfilm specializing in risk analysis for multi¬nationals testified in US congress;“BERI S.A.feels that operational and socio-political prob¬lems (in South Africa) will become more acutethroughout the 1980s. Therefore, no long-termcommitments in South Africa are recom¬mended.”8 More importantly, the internationalanU-apartheid movement is so strongthroughout the world, and through pickets, callsfor divestment, and threats of consumer boy¬cotts, is pressuring companies against newinvestments in South Africa. France, Australia,and the Scandinavian countries have alreadybanned new investment. Most Third World andEastern Bloc countries would not even considerdealing with apartheid. Of course, disinvest¬ment alone will not terminate apartheid. How¬ever, it will contribute significantly towards thatend.It is important to consider the effect ofdisinvestment on apartheid’s victims: SouthAfrica’s Blacks. First, US companies employless than 1% of the Black workforce and sotheir complete withdrawal would not directlyincrease Black unemployment to any significantextent. The complete collapse of the economywould, of course, cause increased Black hard¬ ship, but Blacks have repeatedly said that theyare willing to pay that price in their struggleagainst apartheid. To call for economic actionagainst apartheid is high treason. Yet theCongress of South African Trade Unions(COSATU), representing over 400,000 Blackworkers who stand to be hurt most directly bydisinvestment, passed a resolution lastDecember that states that it “(B)elieves that allforms of international pressure on the SouthAfrican government—including disinvestmentor the threat of disinvestment—is an essentialand effective form of pressure on the SouthAfrican regime and we support it.”9 DesmondTutu, Winnie Mandela, Allan Boesak, PatrickLekota, who are all prominent Black Leaders,have called for corporate disinvestment. TheAfrican National Congress, the most popularsupported Black organization, has called fordisinvestment for over twenty years.The question now becomes whether dis¬investment, or the sale of stocks, is an effectiveway to obtain disinvestment. The real questionis whether enough money is involved to putpressure on companies to withdraw from SouthAfrica. It is important here to remember that thedivestment movement on this campus is notworking in a vacuum. So far universities andschools alone have divested or agreed to divestabout $.5 billion worth of stocks in companiesdoing business in South Africa. Public funddivestment, at the very least, affects $7 billion.It is in this context that the an\\-apartheidactivists are pressing for divestment. The pres¬sure of this movement has been such that onMarch 3, 1985, the Ministry of Foreign Affairs inSouth Africa announced the creation of aspecial post “to coordinate action againstoverseas campaigns for divestment from SouthAfrica.”10 John Chettle, a registered lobbyistfrom the South Africa Foundation concedes theeffectiveness of divestment and further admits:“They (the divestment forces) have prevented .. . billions of dollars of new US investments inSouth Africa. They have discouraged newcompanies, new investors who were looking forforeign opportunities from coming to SouthAfrica. 11 In this climate the University ofChicago’s divestment would hardly be anempty gesture. Further, though only indirectly,divestment contributes even more. It doesmuch to contribute towards the establishmentof a political atmosphere in which actionagainst apartheid can be taken at all levels.Had it not been for the militant divestmentmovement last year, it is extremely unlikely thatthe US would have enacted any legislationagainst apartheid. This is why divestment,when it takes place, must be for moral ratherthan economic reasons. That is also why dives¬tment needs to happen now: the upsurgeagainst apartheid must not be allowed to dimin¬ish.Finally it has to be shown that divestmentwould not negatively effect the financial healthof the University, that is, make the trusteesabrogate their moral obligation to safeguard thefinancial health of the University. RobertSchwartz, investment advisor and vice-president at Shearson/American Express, testi¬fied before a US House of Representativescommittee: “In conclusion, it is my view that adecision on divestiture should be made on thebasis of whether. . . to take a stand on thequestion of investing in companies that dobusiness in South Africa. The facts and figureson divestment of securities of companies oper¬ating in the Republic of South Africa I believe(have) clearly established that performanceneed not be lowered. Therefore, a decisionabout divestment should not be cluttered byarguments in regard to investment perform¬ance, but be based upon the political, moralissues and as to whether the decision makersbelieve that divestment will have an effect onending the system of apartheid.”12In considering the economic consequencesof divestment on the University two issues haveto be separated: (i) the long-term financialimpact; and (ii) the one-time cost. As regardsthe former, if investment strategy remains un¬changed after divestment, then one would ex¬pect income to decrease because the range ofpotential investments is reduced. This effectcan be eliminated by changing investmentstrategy as every systematic study of the ef¬fects of divestment has demonstrated. 13 Thesestudies show that both risk and rate of returnincrease. The University would earn more but the earnings would be subject to greater annualfluctuations. However, these fluctuations canbe reduced by increased investment in little orno-risk items such as government securities.Thus divestment would have no long-term fi¬nancial effect on the University. If the Universitydivests all at once, the brokerage cost of sellingthe South-Africa related holdings and buyingnew ones would be roughly $1 million. How¬ever, this cannot be considered the real cost ofdivestment. The University’s portfolio is a fluidentity and almost a third of the University’sholdings are traded every year. The same sortof brokerage costs are routinely incurred in theprocess. South Africa-related holdings comprisejust about a third of the holdings and ifdivestment were to be spread over a year ortwo, the additional cost involved would beminimal. By choosing to divest, therefore, thetrustees would in no way be abrogating theirmoral obligation to securing the financial well¬being of the University.In response to these considerations the Ad¬ministration and trustees of the University haveadopted a policy toward South Africa-relatedholdings that consist of two parts: (i) “selectiveinvestment” only in companies that abide bythe Sullivan Principles; and (ii) the use of“shareholder activism” to change corporations’policies towards South Africa. Both of thesewere enunciated, somewhat confusedly, byPresident Hanna Gray during the Teach-In onSouth Africa and Apartheid on October 22,1985. These now require some analysis.The Sullivan Principles, introduced in 1977,are a code of conduct for US companiesoperating in South Africa. They call for volun¬tary efforts from their signatories to providedesegrated facilities, fair employment practices,equal pay for equal work for Blacks and whites,extra job training for Black employees, in¬creases in the number of Blacks in supervisorypositions and improvement in the quality of theemployees’ lives outside the workplace. No¬body denies that these efforts, when honestlymade, benefit some victims of apartheid buteven if all the US companies were to endorsethem less than 1% of the Black workforcewould be affected. What is most importantabout the Sullivan principles is that they makeno contribution towards ending apartheid. Theending of apartheid means political em¬powerment of Blacks, as has been alreadybeen noted, not shared toilets. An addition tothe Sullivan Principles last year asks com¬panies to publicly support the end of apartheidbut that condition can be met simply by signinga public statement. The Sullivan principles areso circumscribed that even the apartheidregime has on occasion been sympathic tothem. They restrict their con attention to condi¬tions inside the corporations. As such theyconstitute no threat to the apartheid outside.Their chief effect, over the years, has been todistill the efforts of anti-apartheid activists toobtain divestment. They have, therefore, been aspecial boon for the corporations involved inSouth Africa. It is surprising that the adminis¬tration and trustees of the University endorseso questionable a set of principles.The administration and the trustees havenever explained what they mean by “trying tochange the policies of the corporations.” Pre¬sumably when they advocate such shareholderactivism they are referring to companies thatalready abide by the Sullivan Principles, oth¬erwise the University would not be owningstock in such companies in the first plaace. Ifthe University now attempts to change cor¬porate policy merely by trying to impose betterstandards of workplace desegregation, provid¬ing more funds for education, etc., these effortsare irrelevant for the same reason the SullivanPrinciples are irrelevant: they are not designedto end apartheid. If the University is attemptingto force the corporation in question to withdrawfrom South Africa, that is, disinvest, then theTrustees have the same goal as the proponentsof divestment. They have simply not chosen theappropriate means.The withdrawal of a corporation from SouthAfrica through shareholder activism, thoughpossible in principle, does not presently seemto be possible in practice. Since 1983 a Securi¬ties and Exchange Commission ruling hasrequired that a shareholder resolution needs toget at least 5% of the vote in the first year, 8%in the second year and 10% in the third year tobe kept alive.14 This means that shareholdershave to organize in order to pursue shareholderactivism. The trustees have presented no evi¬dence of such organization. Divestment is ef¬fective because it is part of a general move¬ment; there simply is no similar movement forshareholder actvism. (A, 1979 proxy vote askingFord not to sell vehicles to the South Africanmilitary and police was rejected by 98% to 2%.)At this University there is not a shred ofevidence that the Trustees have attemptedshareholder activism at all. Until some evidenceis presented, there remains considerable doubtabout the authenticity of the Trustees’ desirefor morally responsible corporate behavior withrespect to South Africa.Besides the endorsement of the SullivanPrinciples and the occasional promises ofshareholder activism, the administration andthe trustees usually offer two other objections toa policy of total divestment: The so-calledcontinued on page 7PICKET THE TRUSTEESTHIS IS THE ONLYTRUSTEES' MEETINGSCHEDULED FOR THIS QUARTERFRIDAY APRIL 11 AT 3PMG00DSPEED HALL4— FftiDA r, APhil 4, 1966—GREy CITY jOuRNalIf the billis inyour name,do youknow howto turn itto youradvantage? Learn to make credit work for you.Now at your bookstore,American Express is providinganswers to your questionsabout credit.Perhaps a phone bill is in yourname. Or you’re in charge of the rent. Oryou have a credit card at your favoritedepartment store. 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Sweepstakes endsMay 30,1986.Where: University of Chicago Bookstore970 East 58th StreetW hen: .April 4, 1986iRELATEDSERVICESAn American E*press companyATTENTION BSCD STUDENTSINTERESTED IN UNDERGRADUATE RESEARCH:SUMMER RESEARCHFELLOWSHIP STIPENDSARE A VAIL ABLEStudents interested in applying for a stipend should contact Professor Gerson Rosenthal, Gates-Blake 17. no later than Apnl 10,1986 Attention U of CFaculty and StaffSUPERSUMMERSPORTSPROGRAMThe University of Chicago,Department of PhysicalEducation & Athletics, willconduct a 4 week sports andfitness program from June 23-July 18,1986The program is open to boysand girls between the ages of9-14, and it will be conductedeach week day from 9:00a.m. -1:00 p.m. (except July4th).Fee $17500For further information,or an application form,please call 962-7681(8:30a.m. -4:00 p.m.)APARTMENTSFOR RENTGRAFF &CHECK1617 E. 55th StSpacious, newly-decoratedlarge studios, onebedrooms, three bedroomsin quiet, well-maintainedbuildings close to campus.Immediate OccupancyBU8-5566Studios, 1, 2, & 3 BedroomApartments AvailableSome Nice Lake ViewsGood LocationHeat IncludedParking AvailableCALLHERBERT REALTY684-23335% Student Discounts9:00 A.M.-4:30 P.M.Monday thru Friday9:00 A.M.-2 P.M.Saturday4morion realtync mStudio and 1 BedroomApartments AvailableIn the Carolan— Students Welcome —On Campus Bus LineN 5480 S. 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Ivory produces the mostconsistently handsome and excitingscenes of his career.”-David Dcnby, NEW YORK MAGAZINEMl rtt MAN I IV < »H> IW H H K Tl< )N^ ?••» < A)l IX KhM ar>d CINE COM Pretenu L M FORSTERS A HUOM WITH A VIEWMAGGIE SMITH - DENHOLM ELLIOTT -JUDI DENCH - SIMON CALLOWHELENA BONHAM CARTER-JULIAN SANDS-DANIEL DAY LEWSI lx ... -H .[Vit t I'«ttt IV.Vv nl Kowmarv I vath''V-' •I'1'-' -pai't . by IttttiWrlMwnM... •. H. ‘..r \H- I > K 1-m.w Mvnfw-.tCinecom ’>1 ( or /< n f ,lm 1 hstr^ufdEXCLUSIVEENGAGEMENT RrtMtd mitditid parting4 hrj H3 so Auditorium G*t*giCongrm W (I Michigan6—FRIDAY, APRIL 4, 1986—GREY CITY JOURNALThe following statement by Reverend Dr.King was made at a meeting at Hunter College,New York City, on Human Rights Day in 1965.Africa has been depicted for more than acentury as the home of black cannibals andignorant primitives. Despite volumes of factscontraverting this picture, the stereotype per¬sists in books, motion pictures, and other mediaof communication.Africa does have spectacular savages andbrutes today, but they are not black. They arethe sophisticated white rulers of South Africawho profess to be cultured, religious and civi¬lized, but whose conduct and philosophy stampthem unmistakably as modern-day barbarians.We are in an era in which the issue of humanrights is the central question confronting allnations. In this complex struggle an obvious butlittle appreciated fact has gained attention —the large majority of the human race is non¬white — yet it is that large majority which livesin hideous poverty. While millions enjoy anunexampled opulence in developed nations, tenthousand people die of hunger each and everyday of the year in the undeveloped world. Toassert white supremacy, to invoke white econ¬omic and military power, to maintain the statusquo is to foster the danger of international racewar...What does the South African Governmentcontribute to this tense situation? These are theincendiary words of the South African philoso¬phy spoken by its Prime Minister. Dr. Verwoerd:“We want to keep South Africa white. Keep¬ing it white can only mean one thing, namely,white domination, not ‘leadership’, not ‘guid¬ance’, but control, supremacy.”The South African Government to make thewhite supreme has had to reach into the pastand revive the nightmarish ideology and prac¬tices of nazism. We are witnessing a rec¬rudescence of the barbarism which murderedmore humans than any war in history. In SouthAfrica today, all opposition to white supremacyis condemned as communism, and in its name,due process is destroyed; a medieval segrega¬tion is organized with twentieth century ef¬ficiency and drive; a sophisticated form ofslavery is imposed by a minority upon a major¬ity which is kept in grinding poverty; the dignityof human personality is defiled; and worldopinion is arrogantly defied.Once more, we read of tortures in jails withelectric devices, suicides among prisoners,forced confessions, while in the outside com¬munity ruthless persecution of editors, religiousleaders, and political opponents suppress freespeech and a free press.South Africa says to the world: “We havebecome a powerful industrial economy; we aretoo strong to be defeated by paper resolutionsof world tribunals; we are immune to protestand to economic reprisals. We are invulnerable to opposition from within or without; if our eviloffends you, you will have to learn to live withit.”Increasingly, in recent months this conclu¬sion has been echoed by sober commentatorsof other countries who disapprove, but, never¬theless, assert that there can be no remedyagainst this formidable adversary of humanrights.Do we, too, acknowledge defeat? Have wetried everything and failed? In examining thisquestions as Americans, we are immediatelystruck by the fact that the United States movedwith strikingly different energy when it reacheddubious conclusion that our interests werethreatened in the Dominican Republic. Weinundated that small nation with overwhelmingforce, shocking the world with our zealousnessand naked power. With respect to South Africa,however, our protest is so muted and peripheralit merely mildly disturbs the sensibilities of thesegregationists, while our trade and in¬vestments substantially stimulate their economyto greater heights. We pat them on the wrist inpermitting racially mixed receptions in our Embassy and by exhibiting films depicting Negroartists. But we give them massive supportthrough American investments in motor andrubber industries, by extending some fortymillion dollars in loans through our most dis¬tinguished banking and financial institutions, bypurchasing gold and other minerals mined byblack slave labour, by giving them a sugarquota, by maintaining three tracking stationsthere, and by providing them with the prestigeof a nuclear reactor built with our technical co¬operation and fueled with refined uraniumsupplied by us.When it is realized that Great Britain, Franceand other democratic Powers also prop up theeconomy of South Africa — and when to all ofthis is added the fact that the USSR hasindicated its willingness to participate in aboycott — it is proper to wonder how SouthAfrica can so confidently defy the civilizedworld. The conclusion is inescapable that it isless sure of its own power, but more sure thatthe great nations will not sacrifice trade andprofit to oppose them effectively. The shame ofour nation is that it is objectively an ally of thismonstrous Government in its grim war with itsown black people.Our default is all the more grievous becauseone of the blackest pages of our history wasour participation in the infamous African slavetrade of the 18th century. The rape of Africawas conducted substantially for our benefit tofacilitate the growth of our nation and to enhance its commerce. There are few parallelsin human history of the period in which Africanswere seized and branded like animals, packedinto ships’ holds like cargo and transported intochattel slavery. Millions suffered agonizingdeath in the middle passage in a holocaustreminiscent of the Nazi slaughter of Jews andPoles, and others. We have an obligation ofatonement that is not cancelled by the passageof time. Indeed, the slave trade in one sensewas more understandable than our con¬temporary policy. There was less sense ofhumanity in the world three hundred years ago.The slave trade was widely approved by themajor Powers of the world. The economies ofEngland, Spain, and the U.S. rested heavily onthe profits derived from it. Today, in our opulentsociety, our reliance on trade with South Africais of infinitesimal significance. No real nationalinterest impels us to be cautious, gentle, or agood customer of a nation that offends theworld’s conscience.Have we the power to be more than peevishwith South Africa, but yet refrain from acts ofwar? To list the extensive economic relations ofthe great Powers with South Africa is to sug¬gest a potent non-violent path. The internationalpotential of non-violence has never been em¬ployed. Non-violence has been practiced withinnational borders in India, the U S. and inregions of Africa with spectacular success. Thetime has come to utilize non-violence fullythrough a massive international boycott whichwould involve the USSR, Great Britain, France,the United States, Germany and Japan. Millionsof people can personally give expression to theabhorrence of the world’s worst racism throughsuch a far-flung boycott. No nation professing aconcern for man’s dignity could avoid assumingits obligations if people of all States and raceswere to adopt a firm stand. Nor need weconfine an international boycott to South Africa.The time has come for an international allianceof peoples of all nations against racism.For the American Negro there is a specialrelationship with Africa. It is the land of hisorigin. It was despoiled by invaders; its culturewas arrested and concealed to justify whitesupremacy. The American Negro’s ancestorswere not driven into slavery, but their links withtheir past were severed so that their servitudemight be psychological as well as physical. Inthis period when the American Negro is givingmoral leadership and inspiration to his ownnation, he must find the resources to aid hissuffering brothers in his ancestral homeland.Nor is this aid a one-way street. The civil rightsmovement in the United States has derived immense inspiration from the successfulstruggles of those Africans who have attainedfreedom in their own nations. The fact thatblack men govern States, are building demo¬cratic institutions, sit in world tribunals, andparticipate in global decision-making givesevery Negro a needed sense of dignity.In this effort, the American Negro will not bealone. As this meeting testifies, there are manywhite people who know that liberty is indivisible.Even more inspiring is the fact that in SouthAfrica itself incredibly brave white people arerisking their careers, their homes and their livesin the cause of human justice.Nor is this a pleato Negroes to fight on two fronts. The strugglefor freedom forms one long front crossingoceans and mountains. The brotherhood ofman is not confined within a narrow, limitedcircle of select people. It is felt everywhere inthe world; it is an international sentiment ofsurpassing strength. Because this is true, whenmen of good will finally unite, they will beinvincible.Through recent anthropoligical discoveries,science has substantially established that thecradle of humanity is Africa. The earliest crea¬tures who passed the divide between animaland man seem to have first emerged in Eastand South Africa. Professor Raymond Dartdescribed this historical epoch as the momentwhen man “trembled on the brink of human¬ity”. A million years later in the same placesome men of South Africa are again “tremblingon the brink of humanity"; but instead ofadvancing from pre-human to human, they arereversing the process and are travelling back¬ward in time from human to pre-human.Civilization has come a long way; it still hasfar to go. and it cannot afford to be set back byresolute, wicked men. Negroes were dispersedover thousands of miles and over many conti¬nents, yet today they have found each otheragain. Negro and white have been separatedfor centuries by evil men and evil myths. Butthey have found each other. The powerful unityof Negro with Negro and white with Negro isstronger than the most potent and entrenchedracism. The whole human race will benefitwhen it ends the abomination that has dimin¬ished the stature of man for too long. This is thetask to which we are called by the suffering inSouth Africa, and our response whould be swiftand unstinting Out of this struggle will comethe glorious reality of the family of man.These speeches reprinted courtesy of theAmerican Committee on Africa (ACOA 198Broadway. N.Y. N Y. 10038).continued from page 4“neutrality" objection and the “slippery slope”argument. According to the “neutrality” objec¬tion—and this was used by Hanna Gray duringthe Teach-In—a University is a neutral in¬stitution and should not enter the politicalarena. This objection, as has been so farpresented, is a little peculiar because by en¬dorsing the Sullivan Principles the Universityhas already gleefully violated its own “neutral¬ity." Further, a decision to continue to invest incorporations doing business in South Africa,while knowing what effect such investmentshave, is a political decision. Every time theUniversity buys stock in it is acting, and must,therefore, accept responsibility for its actions.After all, an endorsement of a status quo is asmuch a political act as a rejection of it. What ismost odd about this objection is that there doesnot seem to be any sense in which a Universitycan be politically “neutral”. Universities do notexist in a vacuum. Universities routinely have tolobby for state funding for educational pro¬grams. They lobby against any legislation cur¬tailing academic freedom. This university doesnot permit certain kinds of classified researchon campus. Presumably this University will notinvest in prostitution or drug trafficking even incountries where they are legal. All of these aremoral and political decisions. It seems, there¬fore, when the trustees and the administrationselectively invoke “neutrality” in order not todivest, they are making a statement about theirviews on apartheid and not their views on therole of the University.The “slippery slope” argument is hardly anybetter. According to this argument, if the Uni¬versity divests from companies doing businessin South Africa today, it will have to divest fromcompanies doing business in Zaire, Kenya, orSaudi Arabia, etc. tomorrow, since these coun¬tries certainly do not have morally adequategovernments. If the administration and thetrustees really believed this argument, theywould not have endorses the Sullivan Prin¬ciples. By adopting their policy of selectiveinvestment it woild seem that they have al¬ready begun to 'slide (or slither) down the“slippery slope;” there is nothing now to pre¬vent all kinds of pressure groups demandingthe adoption of different criteria for selectiveinvestment. The reason that the “slipperyslope" argument is unsound is the one point on by Rich TraubttCome to a University Coalition for Divest¬ment meeting and you will see that the anti-apartheid movement at the University of Chic¬ago is alive and well. While not as large oractive as at other campuses (80 Northwesternprotestors were arrested recently and manycampuses have divested or are divesting) themovement here is now the closest it has beento seeing the University divest.Two recent events have shown the Univer¬sity’s trustees that opinion contrary to theirpositions continues to mount. The ReverendJesse Jackson and Bishop Desmond Tutu wereinvited to campus by student groups as well asfaculty and the Teamsters clerical local. Re¬verend Jackson spoke last Spring and BishopTutu, this past January. Their message to thetrustees was clear; The Sullivan Principles arean outmoded method of opposing apartheidand the university must divest if it is to maintainits credibility among anti-apartheid Americanswhich there is consensus between all sides inthe current debate; that apartheid constitutes aspecial moral evil in the world today. There isno such consensus about Zaire, Kenya, SaudiArabia, etc. In other words, there is a thresholdof evil which must be crossed before such aconsensus could take place. That is why somany institutions have managed to divestwithout incurring the type of consequencesenvisioned in the “slippery slope” argument. Itis, of course, possible that Mobutu of Zairemight begin extermination camps some time inthe future. In such a circumstance one wouldhave to consider economic action against ZaireBut a fear that one will have to act morally inthe future is hardly a reason for not actingmorally now! At present, therefore, there seemsto be no rational motivea for not divesting. This,then, is the case for immediate total divest¬ment.Footnotes:' Apologists for apartheid sometimes argue thatthese figures bear no import since Black SouthAfricans are comparatively better off than, forinstance, Black Ethiopians The argument isfallacious because the appropriate comparisonis to other members of the same society, notsome other one Further, the struggle againstapartheid is primarily a struggle for political and South Africans.Along with these high profile events, therehave been many other efforts aimed at in¬cluding the University of Chicago in the con¬tinuing nationwide anti-apartheid “teach-in.”These culminated with the Midwest StudentAn\\-apartheid Conference held last Novemberin Ida Noyes Hall. Three hundred students frommore than 20 schools throughout the midwestparticipated in 10 workshops.After the conference, several groups dis¬cussed forming an anti-apartheid coalition, ashas been done at other campuses. Activedemonstrations, coordinated by coalitions,make trustees uncomfortable enough to be¬come interested in finding alternatives to in¬vesting in apartheid. Formed in January the U.of C. Coalition has met three times and ispresently composed of representatives from theAction Committee for a Free South Africa.Committee Assembled in Unity and Solidaritywith the people of El Salvador, Faculty forDivestment from South Africa, Organization ofBlack Students and Third World Politicalempowerment, not for inter-racial sex2 In spite of this being the stated University policy,Kenneth West. Chairman of the Board of Trus¬tees has admitted to members of the Faculty forDivestment from South Africa that the Univer¬sity has never divested from a company be¬cause of its failure to abide by the SullivanPrinciples Moreover, student activists haverepeatedly demonstrated that the Universitycontinues to invest in companies that haveeither not signed the Sullivan Principles (andcannot provide any evidence of pursuing non-discriminatory policies) or receive negativeratings for their adherence to those Principles(See Letter to the Editor, The Chicago Maroon.October 11, 1985)3 Quoted in Brooke Baldwin and Theodore Brown,“Economic Action Against Apartheid: An over¬view of the Divestment Campaign and FinancialImplications for Institutional Investors)” (NewYork: The Africa Fund, 1985) p 44 Quoted in Elizabeth Schmidt, Decoding Cor¬porate Camouflage. (Washington: Institute forPolicy Studies. 1980), p 65 Schmidt, pp 18-19* James North, Freedom Rising (New York: Mac¬millan, 1985), p.357 U.S Senate, Committee on Foreign Relations,Subcommittee on African Affairs, U.S Cor¬porate Interests in Africa (Washington: U.SGovernment Printing Office, 1978), p.138 U.S. Congress, House of Representatives, Forum. Its goal is to see that the Universitydivests; the coalitipn urges any interestedgroups to send representatives, and also en¬courages any interested students not involvedin groups to attend.The Faculty for Divestment from South Africahas successfully petitioned President Gray tocall a meeting of the faculty senate But mem¬bers of FDSA insist that students must continueto force the issue of divestment with thetrusteesThe coalition plans to maintain a visiblepresence on campus this Spring. Pickets,speakers on the quads, and fundraising fordirect aid are in the works, as is a film senes Anewsletter on the November conference isbeing issued and the coalitiion will send repre¬sentatives to a conference on Namibia atPurdue University. April 19th. Students fromChicago and from all over the midwest will hearand read about our University's investmentpriorities. The University will not be able tomaintain a low profile on its alleged policy of"constructive engagement.”Committee on District of Columbia. Sub¬committee on Fiscal Affairs and Health."SouthAfrica Divestment (Washington, U.S Govern¬mental Printing Office. 1984) pp 361-3629 Documents reproduced in Intercontinental Press(New York. January 27, 86), p.3710 Quoted in Baldwin and Brown, p.1.11 Quoted in Financial Mail.. Feb 1, 198512 South Africa Divestment, p 175 This view issupported also by the testimony of Joan Bav-ania, Franklin Research Corporation and Step¬hen K Moody. U.S. Trust Company in the samedocument13 Investor Responsibility Research Center, "Newsfor Investors," Vol. 12, No 3, Mar 1985. p.5114 Janice Love, The U.S Anti-Apartheid Movement(New York Praeger 1985), p.22.Acknowledgements:This article owes much to a presentation by MiltonWachsberg of Cornell University at the Public Li¬brary Policy Studies Workshop on Divestment.March 13, 1986 and to research done by the CornellFaculty and Staff Against Apartheid and the Coali¬tion for a Free South Africa. Comments by RalphAusten and David Malament at that workshop wereparticularly useful Many of the idea presented herewere developed during continuing discussions withseveral members of the Third World Political ForumLeslie Bernhardt, Heather Blair, Myer Blank, Christ¬ina Gomez. Vinev Lai, Stephen Menn RichardTraube and Natalie Williams deserve special thanksMiles Mendenhall made several useful suggestionsSTUDENT MOVEMENGREY CITY JOURNAL—FRIDAY, APRIL a iQflfi—7STUDENT MOVEMENTS:TRADITION OF RESISTANCEMidwest Student Conference Against Apartheid and Racism.Photo courtesy of Anti-Apartheid Student Alliance - Covak WilliamsonWe are African peoples.We have our own hearts, our own heads, ourown history.It is this history which the colonialists havetaken from us.Today, in taking up arms to liberate ourselveswe want to return to our history, on our ownfeet, by our own meansand through our own sacrifices. —African Partyfor the Independence of Guinea and CapeVerde (PAIGC)by Covak C. Williamson, Co-ConvenerAnti-Apartheid Student Allianceof ChicagoThe Tradition ContinuesAs you read this commentary another SouthAfrican student will be savagely gunned downin the ghetto townships by the apartheid mili¬tary and police forces. Another African studentwill be terrorized and tortured in the apartheiddungeons. The students’ own organization, theCongress of South African Students (COSAS)will still be banned by the apartheid regime. It isin defense and honor of students and studentactivism wherever it occurs that the Anti-Apartheid Student Alliance wishes to take thismovement here in our city of Chicago. This day4 April, 1986 — when we celebrate and com¬memorate the life and struggle of the Rev. Dr.Martin Luther King, Jr. — we recall his requestof us:“We, therefore, ask all men of good will totake action against apartheid in the follow¬ing manner:“Hold meetings and demonstrations....;“Urge your church, union, lodge, or club toobserve this day as one of protest;"Urge your Government to support econo¬mic sanctions;"Write to your mission to the United Nationsurging adoption of a resolution calling forinternational isolation of South Africa;“Don’t buy South Africa’s products"Don’t trade or invest in South Africa;"Translate public opinion into public actionby explaining facts to all people, to groupsto which you belong, and to countries ofwhich you are citizens until an effectiveinternational quarantine of apartheid is es¬tablished.”(—Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. appeals for sanc¬tions against South Africa jointly with ChiefAlbert J. Lutuli on Human Rights Day, Decem¬ber 10, 1962.)For three years now, the student movement— our movement — has been carrying on ourtradition of marching for peace. Of demandingan end to apartheid in South Africa and Nam¬ibia and an end to racist policies and practiceson our college campuses and throughout ournational life here in these United States.The level of student activism againstapartheid as measured by the number of stu¬dents involved in anti-apartheid activities andmeasured by the number of colleges anduniversities that find themselves targets ofstudents' demands for divestment is unprece¬dented. The legitimacy of the appeal for dives¬tment has been proven through struggle andprotest. This is the good news. Many uni¬versities here in Chicago and their boards oftrustees continue to ignore students and defendapartheid, by citing the sham Sullivan Prin¬ciples. through harassing and jailing studentactivists and through other tactics implementedto delay and diffuse debate on this most crucialissue of our time. The board of trustees isthinking they can just wait this issue out. Thatsooner or later students will tire of protest, goback to full time study only; as soon as one ortwo main student ‘troublemakers’ graduate,flunkout, or are expelled all will return to normalwithin the ivy-colored walls. Of course all this iswishful thinking. Students will continue to fightfor an end to apartheid as long as it exists. Thisfight is in our blood, it is our history. We are notasking for a reform of university policy towardsinvestment in South Africa. Hence, studentshave rejected totally the use of the Sullivanprinciples. We know that a committment to thestudent anti-apartheid movement involves asacrifice of time and energy, resources that areimportant to all students in their chosen courseof stuc/, but we have made and will continue tomake the necessary sacrifices. In South Africathe sacrifices of students have been supreme.Since 1976 and the Soweto uprising the over¬whelming majority of those murdered by theapartheid murderers have been students andyouth from the elementary through the collegelevel. Universities’ support for apartheid meanssupport for the murder of students. This is anatrocity. To all the universities, and to all theirboards of (mis)trustees we say that we will nottire, that we will continue this fight and thatthose universities that have ignored our callsfor divestment will divest. But still, not oneuniversity or college within the Chicago metropolitan area, where divestment has been foughtfor, has yet divested Not the University ofChicago, not Northwestern University, not theUniversity of Illinois at Chicago, not LoyolaUniversity, not the City of Colleges of Chicago,not Lake Forest College, not Roosevelt Univer¬sity. This is the bad news.Why is this so? Why hasn’t a single campusin the City of Chicago been forced to divest?This is the question that should be on ourminds today as we honor ourselves by payingtribute to Dr. King and the civil rights, anti-warmovements. A full airing of the views on thisfact, I am confident, will be carried out inupcoming student forums and student debates.To our credit, over the last three years, student groups have conducted educational forums,shown many films, and handed out thousandsof fact sheets informing campus and commu¬nity alike about the crimes of apartheid.Teach-ins on apartheid have been conductedat the University of Chicago and other Chicago-area campuses to further educate ourselvesand others about what divestment is and is not.Maybe the universities and colleges in Chicagorepresent a special challenge to the anti-apartheid student movement. This would not bewithout precedent. The election of a Blackman—Harold Washington—as mayor holdsspecial significance in that it happened inChicago, that heretofore nest of machine poli¬tics, police brutality, and Jim Crow separation.Dr. King thought that Chicago represented aspecial challenge for the civil rights move¬ment—so much so that for a time he evenmoved his family here to a home on the westside, dramatizing the poverty and the dis¬crimination against the Black poor. And whenhe marched in Gage Park on the city’s north¬west side he commented that the viciousnessand violence of the white mob’s reaction wasthe worst he had ever seen, anywhere—worseeven than deep, deep Dixie or the delta ofMississippi. So our task for divestment is aformidable one. But meeting formidable chal¬lenges is part of our history as student activists.A history we are proud of—a history we willdefend. A tradition that continues.Experienced Forces, New ForcesDue to the escalation of campus divestmentactivism and the overall stamp of approval thatstudents have given to protest in general, theclimate remains balmy for recruiting ever-increasing numbers of new students to anti-apartheid student groups. Student protestagainst apartheid has been creative in all itsdifferent forms. There continue to be teach-ins,sit-ins, construction of shanty towns, hungerstrikes, and the naming of campus buildingsafter South African revolutionaries such asNelson Mandela, Winnie Mandela, and StevenBiko. Effective strategies for dealing w>th thegimmickry practiced by boards of tri tees asthey trip over their support for apartheid con¬tinue to be planned and enacted. Campusnewspapers have been diligent in their report¬ing of anti-apartheid activities and some—likethe Grey City Journal— have carried reports inevery issue over the last two years or have attimes been better sources of information aboutevents in South Africa than even the citydailies. College radio stations have supportedstudent concerns, through increasingly pro¬gramming progressive or "message” musicsuch as reggae, blues, Latin or Africanrhythms. All these developments give life and breath to the unlimited possibilities a studentfaces when crossing the bridge from student tostudent activist. We are making progress. Asimple exercise would be to count the numberof fellow students you pass in a single day whohave an anti-apartheid button or an anti-apartheid T-shirt, arm-band or bracelet. Theresults of this simple survey would be en¬couraging, and even better news is that thenumbers are increasing every day.The recount cultural awareness of the evil ofapartheid is something that wouldn’t be hap¬pening if it weren’t for the popularity of studentactivism. The (Ain't Gonna Play) Sun (Sin) Cityvideo, book and school curriculum have beenso successful because of their appeal to thestudent anti-apartheid movement. To the creditof the artists and producers of that album andvideo, the presentation of the material has beenhonest and straightforward; the unity of theartists is very appealing to a student movement,that thoroughly understands and accepts thetask of forging unity among students of differentraces, nationalities, languages, classes andsocial backgrounds. The defiance towardsapartheid expressed in the song mirrors thedefiance expressed by students when we sayDivest Now! or Trustees—you know—SouthAfrican Stocks Have Got to Go! Compared toone year ago, hundreds of new students at thehigh school, undergraduate and graduate levelhave come to know what these slogans mean,so much so that on today’s picket line, themajority of protesters are most likely studentswho as recently as a year ago had neverparticipated in any protest activity. As long aswe continue to encourage and support popularareas of protest, such as music and othercultural forums, then our ranks should continueto swellCross Campus/Community CoalitionsIf I had to choose one objective for the anti-apartheid student movement in Chicago I wouldpromote the building of campus-to-campus andcommunity-to-community coalitions. Why wouldI promote the additional task of coalition build¬ing and community outreach, when strongdives ment campaigns on individual campuseshave been unsuccessful (in part due to theapartheid mentalities of boards of trustees)?Let’s examine the benefits and risks of thisstrategy.I believe quite frankly that we’ve been toolenient in our demand for divestment. Thetrustees’ boards at the University of Chicago,Northwestern University, University of Illinois atChicago, Loyola University, the City Colleges,Lake Forest College and Roosevelt Universityall basically mouthed the same responses toour just and moral demands for full divestment from all corporations that support the murder,the torture, the silencing, and the exile ofstudents in apartheid South Africa. It's as if allthese boards of trustees were reading from thesame script, as if all the .chairpersons wereunderstudies in a play produced and directedby Pretoria. It is precisely because of thecollaboration, the unholy alliance amongst thetrustees’ boards, because of their concerted,orchestrated rejection of our call, that we,concerned students at each campus, shouldstrive to become organized concerned stu¬dents, ignoring (real or imagined) campusboundaries, and speaking in one clear voice.We mean serious business, and that businessis the halting of all university dealings with theapartheid regime—period. Now. Let’s not stophere. Each of our campuses are surrounded bycommunities of Black, white and brown andyellow and red youth who want to take up thisstruggle with us. The student an\\-apartheidmovement should become a student and work¬ing youth movement, organized effectively tothrow the decisive blow at investment inapartheid. Each student against apartheidshould make a personal commitment that says,I will organize to bring divestment to my collegeor university before matriculation. Similarly,graduating students are currently refusing toaccept job offers or interviews with apartheidcorporations. What is the moral value of agraduation ceremony, all the pomp and cir¬cumstance, at a University running on bloodmoney, directly supporting apartheid, a criminaland bloodthirsty system of white supremacy...asystem of genocide against African children,old people, women and men. Most importantlyfor us, it’s a system that imprisons, tortures,maims and murders 8 year old students forprotesting inferior education. An economic andsocial system of oppression that for forty yearshas been targeted as an international outcastby those who would defend human rights.Apartheid on a daily basis carries terrorism tonew deadly heights of barbarism and repul¬siveness.We have two reasons (at a minimum) toexpress our moral indignation by building coali¬tions. One is that an examination of the mem¬bers of the boards of trustees of all theapartheid universities, I’m sure, would reveal apattern of repetition—the same names andfaces appearing and reappearing all over theplace. Secondly (and full of sinister con-spiritorial implications) is the cross-involvementof US corporations reaping profits fromapartheid, and their representatives’ influenceand domination over the trustees’ boards. Weas a student movement need to arm ourselveswith this evidence—it will come in handy. Thisfact finding mission could form the basis for aChicago area student-led tribunal, which wouldbe convened to air our grievances against thewrongdoings of the institutions that supportapartheid. The findings and proceedings of thiscity-wide tribunal should become part of eachuniversity’s permanent record; any mailing toalumni or prospective students should includethis information under the title, "StudentViews”. Imagine the influence that we ascurrent students exert over former or futurestudents—it is immense. The aura of prestigeand elitism surrounding certain universitieswould be completely shattered if the truth wererevealed in this way. Think about the hypocrisyof the University of Chicago, sending a slickbrochure to prospective Black students while atthe same time defending the imprisonment andmurder of Black South African students. Ourtribunal would produce the documantation thatwould take the sheets off these universities,and the impact would be awesome. Blackstudents would be appalled at, and thankful for,this information provided by their fellow stu¬dents; indeed the majority of students would. Ichallenge each and every anti-apartheid stu¬dent group and each student government in thecity of Chicago to put the wheels of justice intomotion and call for the Chicago Student Trib¬unal Against University and College Collabora¬tion With Apartheid!Until the philosophy which holdsone race superior and another inferiorIs finally and permanently discreditedAnd abandonedThat until there are no longerFirst class and second class citizenOf any nationUntil the colour of a man skinIs of no more significance thanThe colour of his eyesThat until there basic human rightsAre equally guaranteed to all,Without regard to raceThat until that day,The dream of lasting peace, worldCitizenship and the rule of inter¬national moralityWill remain in but a fleeting illusionTo be pursued, but never attainedAnd until the ignoble and unhappyRegime that now hold our brothersIn Namibia, in South AfricaIn sub-human bondage, have beenToppled utterly destroyedUntil that day the African continentWill not know peaceWe Africans will fight, if necessaryAnd we know we shall winAs we are confident in the victory ofGood over evil, of good over evil—War, recorded byBerhane Selassie I (a.k.a. Bob Marley).8—FRIDAY, APRIL 4, 1986—GREY CITY JOURNAL