FeaturesAn Irrational Inquiry Striking OutSuper Bore XVIIcenterspread page fiveThe Chicago MaroonVolume 92, No. 32 The University of Chicago ©Copyright 1983 The Chicago MaroonHyde Park resident Ellida Sutton Freyer sketched this drawingduring the U of C Folk Festival this weekend. Drawn here are LixCarrol, Marty Fahey, and Jimmy Keane. Tuesday, February 1, 1983Parents seek damages in deathBy Jeff TaylorThe University of Chicago will becharged with negligence in the ac¬cidental death last Dec. 3 of Wood¬ward Court resident Lisa Good, theMaroon has learned.The Good family’s attorneyDavid Dixon said he sent a letter tothe University Jan. 25 demandingdamages for Lisa’s death, thoughthe amount of the demand was notgiven. “We haven’t plugged in anydollar figures vet,’’ he said.Good, a first-year student fromIowa, died after falling from afourth-floor window during a pri¬vate party in Upper Rickert house.She was sitting in the open windowwhen she fell.The demand letter is the family’sfirst step in taking legal actionSG presents progress reportsBy Guy WardStudent Government (SG) Presi¬dent Alan Granger reported on theprogress of SG committee work inhis “State of student government’’address last Thursday night.Granger asked the chair of eachof seven committees to give a shortpresentation to the assembly to ex¬plain their plans for 1983. Grangertold the assembly, “Feel free togrill these people. I appointedthem and they took the appoint¬ment with the understanding thatthey have responsibility to getthings done.”Granger himself outlined thesuccessful efforts of the Cafe Com¬mittee to have Hutchinson Com¬mons open for service weeknightsfrom 9 p.m. to 12 midnight. Thecommittee sought the late nightservice as an alternative to thecrowded Ex Libris coffeeshop inthe Reg, but was not entirely satis¬fied with the choice of Hutch be¬cause of “Its limited nature, in¬cluding menu and facilities” asVice President Joe Walsh noted.Late at night, the medieval atmo¬sphere at Hutch is the opposite ex¬treme of the bright and noisy Ex Libris. W'alsh stated, “It’s a begin¬ning.”Ex Libris Governing BoardChair Tim Wong, reviewed the re¬cent improvements at the coffee-shop. Last year Ex Libris cleared a$3000 profit and has used some ofthe money to install counters alongthe walls of the seating area. Theboard is now planning additionalimprovements. Granger re¬marked, “There’s definitely roomfor improvement at Ex Libris.’Chair Mark Contreras thenspoke for the Activities Commit¬tee. In the past, this committee hascoordinated events such as lastyears Memorial Day festivitiesand Homecoming “Moon Dance.”This quarter Contreras wants tobring a speaker to campus. He toldthe assembly, “Chicago is a hugecity and the number of peopleavailable to speak to students ishuge.”The Academic Affairs Commit¬tee, under the direction of chairSusan Gallagher, organizes boththe Round Table interdisciplenaryforum and the Open University.“This quarter, the Open Universitywill be on a much less extendedPolice union unclearby Cliff GrammichWhile the contract between theUniversity and its security forcesexpires today, the question ofwhich union will represent the se¬curity guards in new contract ne¬gotiations remains unclear.According to Jon Patterson,president of Local 200 of the IllinoisConfederation of Police, which cur¬rently represents the union, if noresolution is made on the Universi¬ty’s appeal of the right of Local 710of the International Brotherhood ofTeamsters to be the bargainingunit, Ix)cal 200 will continue to rep¬resent approximately 65 securityofficers until the question is re¬solved.The present conflict startedwhen the security guards votedlast Wednesday 32-17 to give thebargaining powers for the securityofficers to the Teamsters. Local 200 have represented the securityguards for the past two years, in¬cluding the contract negotiationsof the expiring contract. Local 710had previously represented the se¬curity guards, according to Patter¬son. However, the University hasquestioned the right of Local 710 torepresent the security guards,since the Teamsters union alreadyrepresents other University em¬ployees and would hence be barredby the National Labor RelationsAct from representing securityguards.Patterson, in commenting on thepresent situation, said that the votewas an expression of the securityguards for Local 710. He added that“we feel that we did good” in rep¬resenting the security officers, butthe officers felt the Teamsters willbe a stronger force in representingthem. basis,” Gallagher explained,“Some Resident Heads will teachcourses in the dorms.” For the fu¬ture, Gallagher plans some “newtwists” including courses tied withthe Documentary Film Group(Doc) and the Court Theater. “Weare trying to provide alternativesto the great books courses,” shesaid. Open University courses areusually taught by professors intheir spare time. The program isoutside of the official U of C curric¬ulum and no grades are given. Gal¬lagher’s committee also hopes toorganize a “forum on the directionin the College.”The University Services Com¬mittee, chaired by Tom Powers,will arrange the 24-hour studyperiods at Harper for finals week.His group also will recommendthat the University install a elec¬tronic detection system in the Re-genstein Library. In addition,Powers will continue the ongoingfight to have white security phonesplaced on the Hyde Park IC plat¬forms.The Student Services Committeeunder Jeff Wolf has tentative plansfor a new version of last year’s 7-11express which lost $1700-$1800. Hehopes to have the bus shuttle stu¬dents to the Checkerboard Loungeand possibly Second City. Wolfstated that the Checkerboard’sowner favored the idea and mightgive students a discount. Wolf alsois interested in an exchange pro¬gram with Mundelein College onthe Chicago's North Side. He saidadministrators at Mundelein wereenthusiastic about the idea.In the final presentation of thenight, Vice President Joe Walsh,chair of the ad hoc Committee onIntercollegiate Relations, told theassembly that his proposal for theUniversity to host an American As¬sociation of University Students(AACS) Conference in April hadbeen accepted by the AACS execu¬tive board. Walsh will attend aplanning conference Saturday toset the details of the conference.This is the first time the tradition¬ally Eastern conference will cometo Chicago. against the University. Accordingto Dixon, the action will entail anallegation that the University “didor failed to do something” instru¬mental to Good's safety, but exact¬ly what the charge will be “is diffi¬cult to say. The complaints are notyet formalized,” he said.One account of the accident saidGood leaned against a closed win¬dow that gave way, but it was laterconfirmed that the window hadbeen open and the screen re¬moved.Edward Turkington, associatedean of students in the University,said that the University would“look at the issue” of the missingscreens, adding that “the problemis not exclusive to WoodwardCourt. We put up screens and theyare frequently taken down by stu¬dents.”Last May a student fell out of asecond-floor window of the Shore-land, receiving minor injuries. Noaction was taken by the Universityat that time.Students at the Shoreland. Wood¬ward and Pierce Tower have beenreprimanded in the past for “hang¬ing and sitting” in window's, Tur¬kington said. He added that thereare no immediate plans to put uprestraining bars or other safetyfeatures, but “we will take a lookat the physical conditions and see if there is something we mightwant to do.”Beer was served at the UpperRickert party, in violation of Uni¬versity regulations and statedrinking age requirements. At thetime of the accident. Turkington,then director of housing, said thatLisa “may have had something todrink.” but there was no w'ay to becertain.“The question of students whodrink is a problem at every institu¬tion that I know of,” he said. “Wedo plan to reexamine what we do.simply because (as a result of theaccident) we ought to.”Asked yesterday for comment,neither Turkington nor Vice Presi¬dent and General Counsel ArthurSussman knew' about the demandletter. “This is the first time I’veheard about it,” Sussman said.The letter was addressed to theOffice of the Dean. Dixon said,“and may take some time to filteron to the General Counsel's of¬fice.” It is not clear as to whichdean the letter will be deliveredUniversity Dean of StudentsCharles O'Connell was unavailablefor comment.A demand letter does not auto¬matically lead to a lawsuit, if a sat¬isfactory agreement is reached outof court.8 profs get tenuredThe University tenured eightprofessors and offered term pro¬motions to 17 other faculty-members last December. Sixtyfaculty members were reappoint¬ed and 10 resigned or were termin¬ated.The University awarded tenureto six assistant professors and twoassociate professors in the Divi¬sions and the College. No facultymembers from the biologicalsciences clinical departments, theprofessional schools or physicaleducation were granted tenure.Most faculty appointment deci¬ sions are made in DecemberTerm promotions, which entailbeing moved up a rank but not ten¬ure, were granted to four instruc¬tors in the biological, sciences clin¬ics and four instructors in thephysical education department butto no instructors in the CollegeTerm promotions were also grant¬ed to three assistant professors inthe Divisions and the College.One instructor, six assistant pro¬fessors and three associate profes¬sors were either fired or resigned.The University does not releasethe names of tenured professorsSTEP tutor and student. To learn about this and other volun¬teer jobs on and near campus, turn to the centerspread.Consideringa personalcomputer?You Must See the Kaypro II Portable ComputerPrograms included let you do Word Processing, Maintain £ J* mm mm mmBibliographies, Catalog and Retrieve Data, Do Financial W § M VflAnalysis, Communicate with Other Computers. | §1Complete your system with a printer...Letter quality and graphics - The Daisy Writer at $1295or Versatile matrix printer - the Epson MX80FT at $595COURSES AVAILABLE:Perfect Writer, Perfect File, Perfect Calc, & SurveyCall Rene Pomerieau at 752-7362 • He sells solutions.VALUE ADDED SYSTEMS1701 E. 53rd Street • the Del Prado Mezzanine“a step beyond...a step above” 1 jfc American Heart^Association HYDE PARK UNION CHURCH5600 S. Woodlawn Ave.Church School (all ages) 9:45 a.m.Worship Nursery Provided 11:00 a.m.W. Kenneth Williams, MinisterSusan Johnson, Baptist Campus MinisterCome, Worship, Study, ServeLUTHERAN CAMPUS MINISTRYAugustono Lutheran Church5500 S. Woodlawn Ay#.Tues., 5:30 p.m. — Eucharist6:00 p.m. — Pizza Supper ($2/person)/Discussion“The Dialogue Between Science and Theology”Denny Clark, Lutheran Campus PastorThurs., 7:30 a.m. — Morning Prayer and BreakfastNeed An Eye Opener?stop byHutchinson CommonsMonday ■ Friday9 PM - MidnightHamburgers,Frankfurters, GrilledCheese, FrenchFries, Snacks, Soup,Yogurt, Fresh Fruit,Ice Cream, Coffee,Tea, JuiceCorner of 57th & University(across from Regenstein) . qovemmentt™ .to.- ‘-“"...to. « .»»,agency '°C8"s*"9 • st^u«**•?£#* in a -ne^ 'salanes.••■-““"•"t .TO>- “"•"to.—'"""' f2—The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1, 1983NewsOverseas fellowshipsThere will be a meeting Thursday, Feb. 3,at 10:30 a.m. in Foster 103 (South Asia Com¬mons) for all graduate students interestedin applying for the University’s SpecialOverseas Dissertation Research Fellow¬ships.The Special Overseas Dissertation Re¬search Fellowships are intended to providesupport to students (US citizens and perma¬nent residents only) who will be financingdissertation research abroad through loans,personal savings, and/or small grants. (Re¬cipients of major overseas research grantslike Fulbright, SSRC, DAAD, etc. will not beeligible.) In 1982-83 grants from the SpecialOverseas Fund ranged from $600 to $2000.The maximum grant that can be allotedfrom the fund is $2000, but most grants aresmaller.Only those who must go abroad for disser¬tation research are eligible for awards fromthe fund. Applications will be judged on theneed to go abroad to do research, the feasi¬bility of the project, and financial need.Applications for the Special Overseas Dis¬sertation Research Fellowships are avail¬able from your dean of students and will bedue in late March.McDavid gets awardfrom SorbonneRaven McDavid, professor emeritus inthe departments of English language andliterature, linguistics and education, has re¬ceived the Docteur de L’Universite awardfrom the University of Sorbonne.McDavid, who edits The Linguistic Atlasof US and Canada, has spent his academiccareer producing a record of usage of livingAmerican language, and exploring the his¬torical, linguistic and literary implicationsof that record.McDavid calls language “the mostcharacteristic activity of human beings.” Atypical research project involves travelling to an area, such as the town of Bath in theFinger Lakes region of New York State, se¬lecting representatives from several cultur¬al levels (old families, formally educatedpeople, etc.) issuing questionaires of 500 to800 items, and then comparing the linguisticpatterns of these people. Results include thediscovery that near the Finger Lakes, usagemore closely resembles Pennsylvania dia¬lects than it does the expected Yankee dia¬lects. This led historians to readjust theiraccounts of settlement patterns of thearea.PHOTO BY ARA JELALIANRavin McDavid with his awardFinding for other projects may De oasedupon, for example, the pronunciation ofcommon terms like “Baltimore” or theusage of the Chicago term “prairie” for avacant lot. McDavid, who recently supervised a newedition of Mencken’s American Language,and co-edited a book on the use of dialect inAmerican humor entitled Mirth in America,is disturbed by the common stereotypes as¬sociated with “standard” usage. Americansassume, McDavid says, that well-educatedpeople speak in suburban, white English,like the television newscasters. This preju¬dice, he maintains, leads to narrow views ofeducation and social status.Aside from the importance of his ownwritings, McDavid has laid the groundworkfor much future linguistic research.Forum on peacemovements in EuropePeace movements in Europe, especiallyWest Germany, will be discussed at an openforum at 7:30 p.m., Feb. 3, in the GardenRoom of the First Unitarian Church, 5650 S.Woodlawn. The speaker will be StefanSchaaf, a conscientious objector from WestGermany, currently doing his alternate ser¬vice with the Chicago Peace Council.Sponsors for the forum include Social Re¬sponsibility Committee of the First Uni¬tarian Church, Hyde Park Chapter ofNOMOR, Social Action Committee ofK.A.M. Isaiah Israel, University of ChicagoStudent Committee on Arms Control andDisarmament, and the Hyde Park-KenwoodPeace Council.Stefan Schaaf is a member of Action Rec¬onciliation/Service for Peace (Aktion Suh-nezeichen/Friedensdienste), a West Ger¬man organization which works for peaceand against the roots of fascism and neo-fa¬scism.The public is invited.Alderman debatesAil of the Aldermanic candidates will at¬tend the Aldermanic Forums in the 4th and5th Wards. The 4th Ward forum, initiated by the WestHyde Park Community Organization andco-sponsored by the Kenwood Open HouseCommittee, the League of Women Votersand the Hyde Park-Kenwood CommunityConference will be held Monday, Feb. 7 atChicago Osteopathic Medical Center Audito¬rium, 1000 East 53rd St., at 7:30 p.m.The 5th Ward forum will be held Thurs¬day, Feb. 3, at Hyde Park Union Church,5600 South Woodlawn (entrance on 56thStreet). This forum is sponsored by theLeague and the Conference, and will start at7:30 p.m.Rosemarie Gulley, director of CommunityRelations, W’LS-TV, will moderate the 4thWard forum, Lee Langster, president of theWest Hyde Park Community Organization,will be the parliamentarian.Moderator of the 5th Ward forum will beDavid Axelrod, political writer, ChicagoTribune. Stephen Thomas, vice-president ofthe conference, will serve as parliamen¬tarian.Because of the number of candidates, thesponsors hope to give every candidate achance to express their campaign goals.Candidates will open with a three minutestatement, the order to be determined by alottery drawing.The emphasis of the debate will be the re¬sponsibility of the Alderman to the commu¬nity. People are asked to bring written ques¬tions with them. A panel of three members,representing the sponsoring organizationswill organize the questions into specific ca-tagories.For further information, call 842-0432 or288-8343.Aid forms availableFinancial aid applications for 1983-84 arenow available in Harper 242. They must becompleted and returned by April 1 for stu¬dents seeking aid during the 1983-84 aca¬demic year■Xl 55th and Hyde Park Boulevard643-5500Stop in after Friday’sCornell game, or after anevening’s study.Lunch: Tues.-Sat. 11:30-2:30Dinner: Mon.-Thurs. 5:00-10:30Fri.-Sat. 5:00-12:00Sunday 5:00-9:00Sunday Brunch: 10:30-2:30 — Late Evening Special —s2.95 pitchers of beer, appetizilight sandwiches, & dessertsTHINGS ARE LOOKINGUP FOR THE WOMEN’SBASKETBALL TEAMThe Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1. 1983—3— 1 ■■1654 E. 53rdSS5-220&636 S. Michigan AvefM§ rcnCif WeaccePt\ 'wm r w r major credit cardsWeekly Luncheon SpecialChicken with Chinese VegetablesFried Rice, Soup, & Tea Close vicinity to U. of C. 10 minutes directly north,Plan your next conference/meeting or group housing.Special rates for University of Chicago faculty andvisitors, $32.00 single/$37.00 double. Only best roomsblocked. 17 conference rooms to accommodate 10-500.We now feature hilarious production Shear Madness inMayfair Theatre, and Joe Segal’s famous JazzShowcase in the intimate Blackstone Cafe (Studentdiscounts - Sun. matinee 3:00 PM).For mom information, call Natalie Vitek, Director ofSales, 427-436®.11 am-2:30 pmTues. Sat.maria n realtyinc.REALTORStudio and 1 BedroomApartments Available- Students Welcome -On Campus Bus LineConcerned Service5480 S. Cornell684-5400For your dental needsDr. George L Walker,D.D.S., PC.General Dentistry1623 East 55th Street752-3832Office HoursBy AppointmentCourtesy discountextended to studentscMirnm5234 S. Dorchester Ave.Walk to museums, parks, the lakeSTUDIO APARTMENTSFurnished and unfurnishedutilities includedLaundry roomSundeck • Secure buildingCampus bus at our door-■ v. ■ ■ -.:mil—■1 : 'A-..-.It you're a graduating foreign language major who'slooking for an opportunity to apply your proficiency ina challenging, highly professional work environment, youowe it to yourself to consider the National Security .Agency(NSA,. United States citizenship is required for all NSA careerSo don't compromise your talentTranslate your language skill into something much moreby scheduling an interview with the National Security Agencythrough your college placement office if tnat is not possible,you may write the National Security Agency. Attention. M322(WES). Fort Meade. Maryland 20755.As an NSA linguist, you will work on a wide range ofassignments involving translation, transcription, and analysis'reporting that contribute to the production of vital foreignintelligence informationYou can count on receiving advanced training in yourprimary language(s) along with many years of continuedprofessional growth. There are opportunities to travel and toenjoy the numerous cultural, recreational and educationaladvantages of being home-based in one of the most excitinggrowth regions of the 1980's - the Baitimore/Washingtonmetropolitan area The NationalSecurityAgency *Where learning never ends.if you are proficient in a Slavic. Near Eastern or Asianlanguage, the National Security Agency offers you unparalleledcareer opportunitySalaries at NSA start at the GS:7 level for those whohave earned a BA degree. Moreover, you will have all theadditional benefits of federal employment.Striking Out/ David BrooksThe slings and arrows ofoutrageous boredomIt was a record people thought wouldstand forever. On Jan. 14,1973, the Washing¬ton Redskins and the Miami Dolphins set themark for the dullest game in NFL history.But last Sunday the same two teams provedan old adage: records are made to be bro¬ken.How could a game be dull that featuredsuch electrifying superstars as Nick Gia-quintos and LeCharles McDanial (who wasasked to change his name because it lookslike a typo)? And how could an event cover¬ed by 19 announcers, 23 cameras and $9 mil¬lion worth of electronic equipment be any¬thing but thrilling? Well, that’s the greatthing about football: anything can happen,and usually does.The Washington Redskins dominated ev¬erything Saturday afternoon except, for atime, the score. Take away two plays — a73-yard reception and a 98-yard return —and the Dolphins might just as well re¬mained in Florida. Of course that wouldhave cheated 110,230,000 Americans out of anice, Sunday evening nap.* * *I read the week’s volume of news hypeand the 16 hours of pre-game coverage withunflagging interest. 1 learned that the gamewould be “won or lost in the trenches.’’ ThatWashington was going to try to “move thepigskin.” That the team that could “put themost points on the board would probablyemerge the victor.”Whoever won, Len Berhman told me, itwas “going to be some kind of ballgame”because both teams had “come to play” andconsequently, would “pull out all the stops.”Yup, Merlin Olsen agreed, this was “the cul¬mination of a dream.” Joe Thiesman pos¬sessed a “rifle” and David Woodley wouldcome out “throwing ropes.” And what about“speed merchant,” Jimmy Cefalo? “What aset of wheels on that kid, huh?”Of particular interest to me was the in-depth coverage of the construction of theNBC studio on the Rose Bowl roof, the fiveminute report on Pasadena’s car rental in¬dustry on NBC’s Sports Journal and thepromo for Mr. T’s “A Team.” This wasgoing to be a veritable historic event.I know now that I should have been warv of all this hype. W’hen I realized that thesetwo teams have a collective personality re¬sembling that of Tommy Newsome, theback-up bandleader on the Tonight Show, Ishould have guessed this would not be thecliffhanger I was promised. Or if not then, Ishould have been tipped off when I went tothe Reg to consult the University of Chica¬go’s oddsmaker, Jimmy the Geek, and hetold me that the game would probably be cutoff early for lack of interest.That the team that could “putthe most points on the boardwould probably emerge thevictor.”But it was not long after the opening kick¬off that I understood why Max Factor hadbought up six minutes of valuable commer¬cial time to advertise his new perfume,Ennui. Or why dramatist John Osborne washard at work writing a play based on thegame entitled “Look Back in Boredom.”On the field, players were having troublekeeping their minds from wandering. Ex¬plaining why he dropped a pass, Miami vet¬eran Duriel Harris said, “I saw Woodleythrow it but as the ball was in the air I start¬ed wondering why Howard Baker had an¬nounced his decision not to run for re-elec¬tion two years early if he didn’t plan onrunning for president. Before I knew it, thepass had hit the back of my helmut.”By the middle of the first quarter I was re¬verting to time-passing techniques devel¬oped through years of tedious classes. Istarted playing tic-tac-toe with myself, thenlisting all the fifty states, then all the presi¬dents in order. By the beginning of the sec¬ond quarter I was looking forward to the18th rebroadcast of the Garo Yepremium in¬terception from Super Bowl VII.But the second quarter, by golly, was ex¬citing. The highlight was Fulton Walker’s 98yard kickoff return which was punctuatedby Dick Enberg’s informative announcing:“He’s at the 50! the 40! the 30! the 20! the10!...” proving once again Enberg’s facilitywith second grade mathematics.Also in the second quarter Uwe Von Scha-mann got to kick a field goal. I’d been wor¬ried about Uwe all week, in the first placebecause of the injury to his back and second¬ly because he seems to have misplaced sev¬eral of the letters in his first name.Between halves, Redskin Coach Joe Gibbsprepared his team by giving them plenty ofcoffee, ensuring that they would remainalert. Don Shula was forced to send thetrainers out on the field in the third quarterwith caffeine pills, wasting a valuable time¬out.It was in the third quarter that the Skinsbegan to dominate the game, led by the of¬fensive line, nicknamed the Hogs. I don’t understand this tendency to name footballplayers after the grossest beings imagin¬able. Soon we’ll be rooting for the Boils andthe Hemorrhoids.By the fourth quarter the game was underthe domination of John Riggins, whomarches to the beat of his own, very quietdrum. He could have led his team to anotherscore but during one drive he dozed off andWashington was forced to punt. It was allacademic (I love that phrase) however, asthe Redskins walked all over Miami fromthere on in.Of course in Washington the press corpscan be pretty vicious. The Redskins experi¬enced the thrill of victory Sunday and theagony of reading about it the next day.Still, exercises in tedium like this year’sStupor Bowl make going back to classesMonday a bit more palatable. a^ejmtmentofflustc\^ presents 'Thursday, February 3 • Noontime Concert12:15 p.m., Goodspeed Recital HallJanet Kutulas, flute; Carol Browning, pianoMusic of Copland, Britten and HindemithAdmission FREEThursday, February 3 • New Art Ensemble8:00 p.m., Goodspeed Recital HallWorks by Messiaen, Davidovsky, Shapey, Burge, Sandroff, andLombardo performed by Karen Andrie, cello; Susan Charles, soprano;Steven Elkins, percussion; Christopher Hills, clarinet; Raya Kodesh.violin, Carole Morgan, flute; Salvatore Spina, piano; and HowardSandroff, conductor. Guest artist Emilio Dei Rosario, pianoAdmission FREESaturday, February 5 - University Chamber Orchestra8:00 p.m., Goodspeed Recital HallRavel: Trois Poemes de Mallarme (Suzanne Scherr, soprano);Mozart: Sinfonia Concertante for Winds and Orchestra (DeborahBarford, oboe; Bernadette Matthews, clarinet; Mark McCoy, bassoon;David Barford, hom); Vivaldi: The Four Seasons (Alexander Beltavsky,violin). Conducted by Peter Jaffe.Admission FREEMonday, February 7 - Juilliard String Quartet3:00 p.m., Mandel HallRobert Mann and Earl Carlyss, violins; Samuel Rhodes, viola:Joel Krosnick, cello.Mozart. Quartet in G. K.387: Sessions. Second String Quartet:Brahms. Quartet in a. op.51 no 2Third concert of the UC Chamber Music SeriesAdmission $ 10 (UC student. S6.50)Tickets and information: 962-8068.JimMUSIQUE FRANQAISEDurufle, RequiemRockefeller Chapel Choir, conducted by Rodney WynkoopOrgan Works of Franck and AlainWolfgang Rubsam, Chapel OrganistSaturday, February 5, 1983 • 8:00 p.m.Rockefeller Chapel • 5850 S. WoodlawnTickets: 962-7300The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1, 1983—5Read it now! Parody of tabloid selby Margo HablutzelIt is very hard to miss seeing or hearingabout tabloid magazines; they advertise ontelevision during everything but Saturdaymorning cartoons, and the checkoutcounters of grocery and drug stores areoften linked with racks full of competingtitles. It is as easy to joke about tabloidsas it is difficult to avoid coming in contactwith them, but there is a thin line betweenparody and absurdity that is too easy tocross.A recent publication which just balanceson that line is the Irrational Inquirer. Anylikeness to a gossip magazine, particularlyone of a similar title, is entirelyintentional. The Inquirer is the most recentpublication from the publishers thatcreated the Not The New York Times, theOff the Wall Street Journal, and last year’sNot The Chicago Tribune.One of the creative minds behind NotThe New York Times, Off The Wall StreetJournal, and the Irrational Inquirer isBritish-born Tony Hendra. While in histwenties Hendra moved to the UnitedStates, working for five years in New Yorkas half of a comedy team before moving toLos Angeles to write for network televisionand films.In 1971, Hendra returned to New York towork as editor on the National Lampoon, apost he held for seven years. During thistime, he produced, directed, and co-wrote“National Lampoon’s Lemmings,” an whe'irmSHxyM* mm »•*<*» r*«The PresidentWho NeverDied asBrowder'tLifth $#cr*#AND MUCHMUCHMomFIVE YEARS AGO...The cover of theApril 1, 1977 Maroon tabloid edition ofthe Maroon, edited by Peter Cohn. Off-Broadway hit which first brought JohnBelushi and Chevy Chase to New York.After leaving the National Lampoon.Hendra was involved with severalprojects, including the Not The New YorkTimes, the Off The Wall Street Journal,and The 80’s: A Look Back at theTumultuous Decade 1980-1989, a bookpublished in 1979. Hendra also edited an“official government parody” entitledMeet Mr. Bomb, which spoofs civil defensemanuals.Working with Hendra on most of theparodies was Peter Cohn, a formerChicago Maroon editor who worked onnewspapers briefly before “falling into”writing parodies. Cohn had practicalexperience in spoofing gossip magazineswhile writing for the Maroon; the Apr. 1,1977 issue looked and mostly read like agossip magazine. Readers discovered thatthen-Charlie’s Angel Farrah Fawcett-Majors might be the next president of theUniversity, if a faculty position could becreated for then-husband Lee Majors; thatWilliam Rainey Harper did not die in 1906but lived on until March 1977, hidden in thebasements of the Administration Buildingand (after the sit-in in 1969) HarperLibrary; that a twelve-year-old Lab Schoolstudent had been named Harper fellow andwas a member of the mathematics faculty,teaching classes at 7 a m. so that hisafternoons were free for kick-ball.The paper also had its share of bathos,as it told the tales of one student whose advisor walked out on me...he called mean intellectual dilettant” and anotherwhose fingers had to be amputated with apaper cutter after they froze while heworked on the fifth floor of RegensteinLibrary; another story covered WoodwanCourt resident master Izaak Wirsup’sswallowing of a freshman’s pet six-footpython; the back page told of a bookstackworker whose lungs were deterioratingfrom the book dust he inhaled, and gavethe sad case of an undergraduate socialleader who drowned in champagne-filledBotany Pond “trying to save herreputation” after being carded at andthrown out of the Efendi Restaurant.The only parts of that Maroon whichwere real were the advertisements and aiinsert describing the 1977 Summer SessioiIn the Irrational Inquirer, even these arefakes, advertising back razors, “MotherTeresa’s Face-Lift in a Drum,” the EvelyWad School of High-Speed Eating, theTubby Crisco weight-gain method (“StopChewing!”), bullhorns for families withhard-of-hearing members, cosmic luggag*sparkling Lourdes water, and a companythat will send you fifteen dollars “withouta murmur” — for $17.75 postage andhandling. Even the back-page ad isspoofed, with a liberated “Virginia Dims’wife losing her husband to another man.Rather, most of the ads are fakes. Therare a few items that readers can actuallysend aw'ay for, such as membership in th<“Save the Cockroach” society, andVolunteer Volunteer Volunteer Volunteeibv Sondra KruegerHere s a challenge ior your descriptivepowers- !r> explaining the accompanyinggraph to someone who can’t see it Or howabout reading Henry James out loud"Reading anything out loud for one and ahalf or two hours with clear enunciation isnot quite as simple as one might think < tryto sa> -particular!) " without slurring thesyllables), but approximately thirty-f.ivestudents and Hyde Park residentsvolunteer about two hours of their timeevery week to record college-level booksfor visually-handicapped.students and'professionalsRecording for the Blind. INC., located inthe basement of the Hinds GeophysicsBuilding at 5734 Ellis Ave. is one of 39RFB studios in the United StatesRecording for the Blind has. itsheadquarters in New York City. w here atape library of over 50,000 volumes is keptAnyone needing books recorded applies tothe New York office. If the requested bwikis not already on tape, two copies of thebook are sent to one of the studios to berecorded. The student must pay fop on!)one book, a service that any U of C studentcan appreciate Recording for the Blind isa non-profit organization, and each studiois self-supporting, depending on localand businesses for money to offset becomes a readerThe books are transferred to cassettetapes and sent to the person who requestedthem, while the master tape goes to theNew York library to fill future needsAnyone interested in volunteering forRecording for the Blind is encouraged tocall 288-7077. or go in person to the studio.Monday through Friday from 10 a m to 5P oIf playing doctor was your luvoritechildhood pastime, you might be interestedin the Volunteer Bureau at BillingsHospital There are currently over 2<mipeople volunteering at the hospital, about80 of whom are V of C students PeggyCarswell, director of Volunteer Serv ices,says 'We try .to accommodate studentinterests, ever to creating a volunteerposition where there wasn’t one before."Students work m both Billings and WylerChildren s Hospital in matt) different jobsEmergency room work is popular withpre-meds. but volunteers also work on thenursing floor, m the play rooms, andlaboratories Several students artcurrently working on a special project inthe psychiatry department studyingautistic children. The hospital also hashigh school volunteers, both from career 1high schools in the area and from the V ofC Lab School.Volunteers are asked for a commitmentof four hours per week for at least onequarter Training sessions for emergencyroom volunteers are held during the firstthree weeks of each quarter, but otherpositions are available at any time.Anyone interested in working in theemergency room next quarter should callabout three weeks before the end of thisquarter. Volunteers ready to break up tin-winter monotonv right now can go to theVolunteer Bureau in the basement ofBillings Hospital or call 962-6248 or947-5252. Monday through Friday betweenHam. and 5 pm.Some hospital volunteers read topatients, and the hospital library is badlyin need of books. Paperback^ arecitizenscosts of monitoring machines and tapes.Brenda Smith, manager of the HydePark studio, is assisted by Maria• Ahlstrom. Readers familiar with the‘sciences are especially needed, but general’ readers also are always in demandt Recording a book requires two people: aA volunteer will preferred, because patients who are ableto read to themselves are frequently tooweak to hold up a heavy book, but booksand magazines of all types are welcome.Book donations can he dropped off at themain information desk or the desk at theSurgical Brain Research Pavilion.The Student Volunteer Bureau 1955-4100»affiliated with the Blue Gargoyle, shares abuilding with the University Church at 5655S. University. The Bureau is a United Wayagency, and receives some funding fromthat-organization. It was started about touryears ago by a group of people who enjoyed to volunteer, and who decided ttithe\ could get more people interestedthrough an organized agenev. The headcoordinator is Ann Kok. who is assisted fJoe Scoppo. They place about 200volunteers every year, the majority ofwhom are U of C students.The Student Volunteer Bureau isprimarily a referral agency, with a longlist of positions encompassing almostevery interest. Volunteers are placed insituations relevant to their own skills ancinterests. For those w ith political interespossible volunteer jobs are with the ACL: reader and a monitorfirst learn to monitor, which meanslearning how to operate a reel-to-reelrecorder, follow the text to correct any!fmistakes the reader might make, and addypage beeps in the proper places. After afew weeks of monitoring, th’e volunteer cantake a reading test to determine if his or, her voice and reading ability are suitablefor recording. The test tape is sent to Newj York and if approved, the volunteer6—The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1, 1983Is! Millions! Here!ieairdckanion.er;lyn‘ge,‘y>utis”i.ereliythe “Eternal Salvation” certificate (completewith ‘‘Get Out of Purgatory Free” card), aHerp-A-Thon ’83 T-shirt, and TheEncyclopedia Moronica, described ascontaining ‘‘everything you need to knowin a book.” Cohn says that theEncyclopedia will be glove-compartmentsize, and will contain information on suchimportant, otherwise-overlooked subjectsas Las Vegas, Gomer Pyle, Silly Putty,and marshmallows. Projected publicationdate is early spring.The stories in the Irrational Inquirer areno less odd than the ads. Unfortunately,the publication does not fulfill the promiseof many of it’s cover headlines: ‘ The PopeCan Cure Cancer;” “ ‘It’s Hinkley’sBaby!’ Sobs Jodie;” “Why CelebritiesHate You;” “HOLLYWOOD’S SICK NEWCHAZE — Pajama Parties Where NothingHappens!” The last led to a cover photo offive celebrities, including seven-year-oldDrew Barrymore and Howard “Dr. JohnnyFever” Hesseman, in their pajamas and atangle of pink sheets.The stories inside more than make upfor the unfulfilled cover blurb, as thepublication turns many recent headlinesinside out, with Queen Elizabeth IIclimbing into commoners’ windows atnight, the horror tale of a tinygrandmother who beat up a mugger, andthe family of Rex Babar, all of whomsuffer from “the grotesque disfigurementknown to medical experts and Hollyw’oodproducers as Elephant Man’s Disease.”r Volunteer3th ward alderman Larry Bloom’s office,and various lobbying groups Up andcoming social workers might be intriguedby such things as support groups forbattered women or Planned Parenthood.\ olunteers tutor in ali the local schools,including those tor mentally andemotionally handicapped childrenThe Student Volunteer Bureau alsoriders volunteers to the Hyde ParkNeighborhood <’lub. another local agencyw th programs for children, at 5408 SY nwood Its phone number is 642-4062..Monday-Friday from 0 a m to 6 p mStudents who are willing to give an hourdr two per week to tutor a student Iromone of the local schools wili find severalorganizations who are looking lor tutorsMost will take peopie who can teachdll ft rent areas, but the majorconcentrations are reading andn athematics Student TeachingElementary- Program * STEP is probably. the-best known,.and sets up one-to-onetutoring situations For information, callMike Gong evenings at 241-6394 Tutors arealso needed at Bret Harte School: thecampus co ordinator is Michael Slater at753-8342. room 609. The Student VolunteerBureau, mentioned above, also needsvolunteer lurorsThere is also one campus organization- which is.run entirely by volunteers —- theHotline Since its beginning a few yearsago, the Hotline has become an integralpart oi the University, answering questionsas diverse as the last delivery time tor theMedici, the times libraries open, andwhere to go if your roommate may havetaken an overdose. The hours are 7 p m. to7 a m . and volunteers work in pairs foreach shift Each volunteer must attend atraining session, during which theoperation of the Hotline is explained andstudents are trained in varioussuicide-prevention techniques. Bothgraduate and undergraduate students-arewelcome. Two information sessions arecoming up. one on Feb. 9 and the other onFeb. 17, or you can call the Hotline durihgbusiness hours at 753-1777 Readers are warned that “Repeated Blowsto Head May Cause Brain Damage,” andcan learn of “Russia: Sad Horror of LifeWithout Celebrities or Gossip.” Bylinedwriters include Spuds Terkle, StudsWrongigan, Speedy Lorean, Sue Andrun,Steve Codpiece, and Bugsy LivingstonSiegel.Cohn said that when the writers began towork on the Inquirer, they sat down anddrew up “a big list of ideas,” from whichthey chose the ones which were both funnyand “preposterous” enough for themagazine. Before and during this timeCohn bought as many gossip magazines ashe could.“I told the checkout girl I was buyingthem for research,” he explained.Cohn pointed out that the NationalEnquirer is the most widely readnewspaper in the nation, with sales ofapproximately five million, and that all thetabloids added together form the largestsingle type of newspaper in the country,one which seems to be surviving welldespite the present economic situation.Cohn said that the writers w anted to makea comment about tabloids and to makepeole laugh, and that “since the NationalEnquirer is funny we thought we could doa parody.“Also,” he joked, “We were sittingaround and thinking of the easiest way tomake ten million dollars without lots ofwork while having an immense amount offun.”Cohn is not certain w'hat he would dowith ten million dollars, but buying MadMagazine and The New York Times(possibly to turn it into a permanentversion of Not The New York Times) couldbe possibilities.Will Cohn, Hendra, and the others domore parodies? Cohn is doubtful, for hesaid that “There is a definite glut ofparodies.” However, he adds that he isequally happy working on satires, such asthe Encyclopedia Moronica, and pointedout that there are still quite a number ofuntouched markets.“Nobody has done a parody of Pravda,”he mused. mm21 Top Svperstars Predict 1983IRRATIONAL '1.00V AffAffi f B MS O’*«* iiMMWmilWO. at ax' Km M ****** BIG FATHOLLYWOOD’S SICK NEW CRAZI-Pajoma PartiesWhere Nothing Happens!tknni Howard"It's Hinckley's Baby!”Sobs Jodie HateDr. Tanwwer's Diet Tips Alien PsychicFrom Beyond the Grave triples Human...AND TODAY. The cover of the Irrational Inquirer, a spoof of tabloidson which Peter Cohn was an editor.Hither and YonPermanent temporaryhousingMore than ten percent of the studentsw'ho were placed on a waiting list forhousing at the end of last school year arestill in temporary housing at EmoryUniversity. According to the assistantdirector for student life at the university,the crowding was due to altered“configurations” which set aside lessspace for freshmen and a greater requestfor student housing than in the past year.Although a new', 400-bed facility forupperclassmen is being built, ft will notopen until next year, at which time at leastone freshman dormitory will be razed,leading to speculation that certainupperclass dormitories will then housefreshmen.Students battle coldSeventy University of Pennsylvaniastudents are participating in a two- tofive-month study to determine whether ananti-arthritis drug is effective against thecommon cold. Half of the participants willbe given a placebo while the rest will takeTolectin, an anti-inflammiroty drugmanufactured by MacNeil Corporation,which has been shown to reduce cold-likesymptoms. Students who participate musthave a new cold, and may not be takingany medication or be pregnant. Rejectedstudents will be given traditional coldremedies.Sorternity? Fratority?Northwestern University now has acoeducational Green organization — ChiOmega Rho. The idea started because of the feeling that there is “a wide social gapat NU” and because of the popularity ofsimilar organizations at eastern colleges.The group is not affiliated with NU’sInterfraternity Council or PanhellenicAssociation, and has begun petitioning forrecognition by the Associated StudentGovernment. Next year, the membershope to have their own house with“family-type" living and “an informal,on-going” rush process.Frat not student groupA fraternity at DePaui University haslost its recognition as a studentorganization, in a move which is beingcontested by its president. According tothe student handbook, organizations musthave ten attending members and amoderator. Robert Arnold, the fraternity’spresident, says that Phi Kappa Alpha has11 attending members, and that in the pastwhen a moderator has resigned a new onewas appointed. The fraternity, the school’ssecond oldest, has long had imageproblems and lacks a cohesive pledgeprogram, both of which also must beimproved before the group's status can bereconsideredRepay $1 orUniversity of South Carolina studentswho received too much grant money lastyear are being required to repay the addedfunds. Twenty-six students received thewrong amoung of money due to a“bureaucratic error,” partly due to thefact that the school did not receive thefederal award schedule until some twoweeks after the school year had started. The school had made BEOG paymentsearly so that students could pay theirtuition and enroll for the term Now thestudents must return amounts rangingfrom $1 to $200.Dry NU has wet barDespite Northwestern University’s new,stricter alcohol policy, which is still the“wettest” of any Big Ten school, a bar inthe ten-year-old Norris University Ceterseems to be a “social success,” accordingto the center’s director. An estimated 350patrons frequent the bar on Friday nights,paying a one dollar cover charge andlistening to concerts which are partiallyfunded by the school’s Activities andOrganizations group The A&O hopes thatthe bar, which seems to be turning a profitdesite being closed during the Christmasinterim, will soon assume responsibilityfor funding the concerts itself, but so farthe administration has not returned thebar's financial statements.It has gold fringe...Employees in a Wheaton Collegebuilding discovered that apartially-finished roof is far fromleakproof, as water poured through thesouthern area of an upstairs dining roomand kitchen Plastic was stretched acrossthe rooms to catch the water, and thecontractors, who had stopped work whenrains began to fall, rushed back to thescene. Although the work which had beenfinished was supposed to keep rain out, aCollege employee said “something,somewhere, went w rong No one is surejust what.”The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1, 1983—7JI SportsIM ScoreboardWomen’s BasketballFull Court Press 39 Fun Girls 36Bradbury (by forfeit) Lower WallaceTufts (by forfeit) Lower WallaceBradbury 29 Hale 19To be Announced 42 Full Court Press 35Upper Wallace 26 Breckinridge 18Upper Wallace (by forfeit) SnellMen’s BasketballHitchcock A 47 Salisbury/Vincent 30Thompson (by forfeit) Fallers BCompton 47 Michelson 27Greenwood Celtics 29 Bishop 26Fishbein (by forfeit) Alpha Delta PhiSpike’s Gang 71 HiTops 31News The Curia 61 Fell Lucky Punk? 54Tufts 45 Hitchcock B 20No BS 62 Coulter House 19Chamberlin 73 Lower Rickert 15Barney’s Meat Mkt 42 ...Sandy’s Slammers 28Instigators 61 Bovver Boys 48Hale 42 r. Tufts 35Blackstone 43 Phi Delta Theta 30Dudley 47 Breckinridge 36R-Nobs 45 Jenny’s Jets 43Dewey 39 Hitchcock B 23FIJI (by forfeit) Upper FlintCoulter House 40 Broadview 29Greenwood Celtics (by forfeit) Fallers BThompson 42 Michelson 21Compton (by forfeit) The Cutting EdgePulse 56 McCormick 36No BS 84 R-Nobs 58Orly’s (forfeit) Lexelon (forfeit)Study in FranceThe University of Chicago and the FrenchAmerican Study Center (FASC) of Lisieux,France (near Normandy), have announceda program for students here to study abroadfor one quarter.The UC/FASC program will run oncethrough this spring quarter and againthrough autumn quarter later this year. Allstudents, especially freshmen and sopho¬mores, interested in a quarter-long programof intensive French language studies are in¬vited to participate.The spring quarter program is open to anystudent who has either completed or placedout of French 101, and the autumn quarterprogram is open to students who have com¬pleted or placed out of French 102.The goal of the program is to bring springquarter students to a proficiency level equalto at least that of students who have com¬pleted French 202, and autumn quarter stu¬dents to the level of students who have com¬pleted French 203. Upon return to theUniversity, students will be given an equiva¬lence test by the Department of RomanceLanguages, to receive credit for their stu¬ dies in Lisieux.The cost of the spring quarter session is$2358 group rate for students beginning a 13-week program Mar. 14. For students wish¬ing to delay the program a week to Mar. 21(to leave time for finals week here), the costis $2258 for the 12-week session in Lisieux.Autumn quarter rates are not yet officiallyset, but they are projected to be less thanthose of spring quarter.The fees include tuition for a full scheduleof courses and room and board (except forlunch on class days) with individual hostfamilies.Payment is due no later than three weeksprior to arrival in Lisieux, and U of C finan¬cial aid is not applicable.Sign-up sheets, catalogues and applica¬tions are now available in Wieboldt 205. Formore information on the program applica¬tion procedures, and transportation, see C.France in Wieboldt 217 (office hours Wed.2:30 to 3:30 and Fri. 12:30 to 1:30).Rainer Dimter, professor and assistantdirector of FASC programs, will be oncampus Mar. 7 and 8. Detailed announce¬ments will be posted in Cobb 130 and on theRomance Languages bulletin board outsideWieboldt 205.Informational MeetingsAboutTHE ASHUM PROGRAM*WILL BE HELD ON•Thursday, Feb. 3, 4 PMin Harper 284.•Wednesday, Feb. 9, 4 PMin Harper 284There will also be a discussion of the new Human Biology concentration,which is designed for College students with a wide range of interests and aparticular interest in the biology of human beings. This undergraduate pro¬gram will focus on the development and function of the human organism, aswell as the nature of the interactions between individuals and their social andcultural environments. All students intrigued by this subject mat¬ter-regardless of their field of interest—are encouraged to attend.Applications available inHarper 587,East Tower Frosh/sophmores third in relaysLast Wednesday night the varsity trackteam’s freshmen and sophomores ran withfour junior colleges in a meet featuring fiverelays and eight individual events. Collegeof DuPage, one of the strongest junior col¬lege teams in the country dominated themeet, scoring 91 points. Wilbur Wright Col¬lege was second with 52 points, Chicago wasthird with 51 points, Oakton was fourth with25 points and Kennedy-King placed fifth.Twenty-nine team members participatedin the meet. Gary Levenson (800), John Sey-kora (400), Lance Cooley (1200) and MarkGiffen (1600) were second in the distancemedley relay in 10:59.4. Chicago scored an¬other second place in the 3200-meter relaywith Jeremy Fein, Maan Hashem, TomWetzel, and Mark Giffen. Giffen had a 4:36.11600-meters in the distance medley and a2:01.7 800 meters in the 3200-medley relay.Curt Schafer won the high jump at 6’ 2”,took second in the triple jump with 44’ U/2”and fifth in the long jump with 21’ 6V4” to lead the Chicago scoring. Mike Marietti hada personal best throw of 39’ V2” place thirdin the shot put and Brian Waldman took fifthin the 50-meter dash in 6.3 seconds. AdamVodraska and Mike Rabieh ran 10:16 and10:29 to place fourth and fifth in a large twomile field.Chip Episalla, Alan Boruch, Waldmanand Andy Firstman placed third in the 800-meter relay; Reggie Mills, Erik Burke,Andy Firstman and Dan McGee were thirdin the spring medley relay and Mills, GuyYasko, John Seykora and McGee were thirdin the 1600-meter relay.Chicago placed in every event but the polevault and high hurdles. Coach Ted Haydoncommented, “This meet revealed a goodsupply of runners who show promise of de¬veloping into strong performers for comingyears. A number of the freshmen and sopho¬mores will play key roles in this year’steam.’’Ripon rips Chicago 65-61By Frank LubyChris Jensen scored a game-high 20 pointsto pace the Ripon Redmen to a 65-61 victoryover the University of Chicago men’s var¬sity basketball team Saturday evening inRipon.After an Adam Green basket gave Chica¬go the lead with 14:17 remaining, the Red-men, led by Jensen, opened up an eight pointlead with just under five minutes remainingin the game. They then weathered a furiousChicago comeback, spurred by freshmanguard Rob Omiecinski, who hit five consecu¬tive 20-footers in the closing minutes. Clutchfree throw shooting by Ripon, however, pre¬ served the lead.Ripon took an early 10-4 advantage, andmaintained that spreak throughout the firsthalf. Jensen and Tom Reader each had eightpoints for Ripon, who led 33-26 at the half.Nick Meriggioli (10 points) and Omiecinski(eight points) kept the Maroons in the gamein that first 20 minutes.Omiecinski finished with 18, while Merig¬gioli had 15. Scoring leader Keith Libert,doubled covered all evening, managed onlyten points. Reader had 14 for Ripon.The Maroons’ next contest occurs Fridayagainst Cornell College at 7:30 p.m. in theHenry Crown Field House.n chow £H*W YORK OSAMA CRITICS AW ABO • AMTOtMfTTf PSBRY “TONY AIM ABO"PuirrziB pbizi for dramaNOW THRUFEBRUARY 26 ONLY!SUNDAY MONDAY TUCSQAY WIDNCSDAY THURSDAY FRIDAY SATURDAY300 PM No Perl 800 PM 2.00 PM*-OC PM 800 PM 800 PM 200 PM800 PMPRICCS:Nm . WM, ThunMl IPM; Fn ASM sm mm wm mmSun Mat 3PM Ml IPM 2PM 2PMOrch 8 Mezz Front $30 00 $32 50 $27 50 $25 00Mezz Peo' & 1ft Bole $25 00 $27 50 $22 50 $20 002nd Bole $15 00 $15 00 $13 00 S12 00Specioi noiKtov pwf 2 21 at 2 pmTICKETS AT SOX OFFICE 4 TlCKETPON OUTLETS (Sears & Tribune Tower)TELECHARGE (312) 977-1700GROUP SALES: (312) 977-1705We occept motor crertl card*.© SHUBERT THEATRE22 W. Monroe • Chicago, IL 606038—The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1, 1983«£M3kISportsWomen snatch sixth straight; defeat Wash U, 77-36By Craig RosenbaumThe Maroons won their sixth game in arow last Friday as they defeated noncon¬ference opponent Washington University,77-36, at the Henry Crown Field House.The game was close at the eight minutemark of the first half as the Maroons led18-15. However, by the end of the first half,the Maroons jumped out to a 40-23 lead, andeventually prevailed by a score of 77-36.By Jack PonomarevThe U of C women’s track team toppedfour other teams in the W'omen’s Invitation¬al Track Meet held last Thursday. Chicagowon with a total of 144 points while Universi¬ty of Wisconsin-Parkside had 89, North Cen¬tral had 37, North Park, 27, and Concordia,14.The U of C team finished first in the 4 x 100relays with a 4:29.3 minute time, second inthe 4 x 800 relay with 10:28 8 minute run, andthird in the highjumps. Landa Meyer wonth^ 3000-meter event in 10:56 minutes w'hileSandy Spidel finished second at 5:17 andBecky Redman fourth at 5:31 in the 1500-meter run.Meg Malloy established her personal bestfor 800 meters with a second-place finish in2:38. The duo of Natalie Williams and LindaKinney finished first and second respective¬ly, in the 60-meter dash and long jump com¬petition, and second and third in the 400-meter race. Shanna Smith was first in the60-meter hurdles with 10.1 second time,while Kathy Waters finished second andJackie Moline third in shotputting.The U of C team was not at full strengthfor the event. Several squad members wereeither out with injuries or were recuperat¬ing from injuries and not completely Throughout the game, the Maroons wereable to penetrate against Washington’s one-on-one defense and to convert high percent¬age shots from the inside as the Maroonsmade 46 percent of their attempts from thefield.Gretchen Gates led the Maroons with 20points, a 48 percent field goal percentage,and 12 rebounds. Dana Howd with 12 points,Wendy Pietrzak, 10 points, and Helenhealthy for the meet. Assistant Coach EdFriedman stated “Basically, we have run¬ners who are improving from injury. Theycannot shoot for personal records yet.They’re not a hundred percent healthy.’’Friedman felt there were reasons to be¬lieve that the team would be greatly im¬proved by the time the outdoor seasonbegins in April. “I don’t think anyone on theteam has reached a peak. Each (team-member) is steadily improving,” he stated.Also, women currently participating inother varsity sports will be able to join theteam in the spring.Both Ed Friedman and Head Coach LindaWhitehead indicated that women genuinelyinterested in track and field still have an op¬portunity to make the squad. Concerningmany “No-shows” for the Team, Ed Fried¬man found that “They sign up for organiza¬tional meetings and don’t show up. They feelthat the college level is very intense anddon’t come out.”Sports CalendarMen's Indoor TrackFeb. 2 — North Park College and ValparaisoUniversity, 7 p.m. Field House. Straus , 15 points, were the other Maroonsto score in double figures. The Maroons alsoplayed excellent defense, as Washingtonconverted only 35 percent of its field goals.However, this weekend will not be thateasy for the Maroons as they face confer¬ence opponents Cornell and Coe. TheMarooons lost earlier this month to Cornell,54-46 and Coe 60-51. So far Coe is undefeatedin conference play while Cornell has onlyone loss, which was to Coe. Therefore, thesegames for the 5-2 Maroons will have a signif¬icant impact on the conference standings.However, Chicago Coach Dianne Nestelsaid that the basketball team has improvedsince its early season losses to Coe and Cor¬nell. The Maroons shot only 29 percentagainst Coe and 35 percent against Cornellin their early season losses. Coach Nestelsaid that the Maroons problem was forcingthe ball inside too much against excellentzone defenses instead of attempting moreperimeter shots.During the current six-game winningstreak, the Maroons have been hot from theoutside especially Karen Van Steenlandt.Dana Howd, and Beverly Davis. TheMaroons now score on 41 percent of theirfield goal attempts.Cornell is led by forwards Kathy Have-land and Sheryl Gatewood, the center JoyceWeeg, all who average scoring in double fig¬ures. The key players on Coe are Julie Gib¬son and Joe Ann Reynolds, who are notedfor their outside shooting.So this weekend, the Maroons will playtheir most crucial games of the year so farwhen they face Cornell at 5:30 p.m. Fridayand Coe at 2 p.m. Saturday. Both games willbe at the Henry Crown Field House.Coach Nestel said, “The keys to bothgames are applying defensive pressurewithout fouling, controlling the offensiveboards and handling both teams’ zonepress.”Runners dominate meetIs SK),000enough incentive tocall 876-4308?Of course it is. Especially if it couldamount to a student loan from Sears BankWhich is the w hole idea for callingus at 876-4308.You see, we’re offering loansthrough the Illinois Guaranteed StudentLoan Program. And you can get one foras little as $ 150 all the w^ay to $25,000, depending on your educational program.You're eligible if you have a per¬manent residence in the Chicago area.And you don't even need an ac¬count w’ith Sears Bank to qualify.So if you need money for your edu¬cation, isn't S 10,000 worth the priceof a phone call?Sears Bank and TrustStudent LoansSears Tower Chicago, IL 60606c 1983 Sears Bank and Irusi A wIh.IIv imihiI subsidiary ol Midland Bantnrp lm Memlx-r 1 D I CThe Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1. 1983—9Campus Films Classified AdsThe Secret Agent (Alfred Hitchcock, 1936)An ex-writer is sent to Switzerland by theBritish government during the first WorldWar to track down and dispose of a Germanspy with the aid of a beautiful “wife” and arepugnant south-of-the-border assassin. Themission is eventually accomplished, but notbefore a reprehensible killing of an innocentman, a memorable visit to an Alpine choco¬late factory, and an outrageous deus ex ma-china of a train wreck have all taken place.Tues., Feb. 1 at 8 p.m. Doc. $2.All Fall Down (John Frankenheimer, 1962)Warren Beatty plays a thoroughly despica¬ble young hustler whose charmingly seduc¬tive appeal masks an obscene machismothat is manifested in his abuse of women.Wed., Feb. 2 at 8 p.m. Doc. $2.The Gay Divorcee (Mark Sandrich, 1934)“Men don’t pine, girls pine; men just suf¬fer!” Style triumphs over content as Astairerescues Rogers from suitcase, gigolo, andmatrimony, and Edward Everett Hortonlearns to “K-nock K-nees” (his only singa-long in the series, for good reason!). EvenBetty Grable takes a bow in this medley ofCole Porter and Hollywood productionnumbers, but the real icing belongs toRogers' florid co-respondent, Erik Rhodes(“whichever way the wind is blowing, thatis the way I sail”), who wreaks gentle havocwhen he tries to take fate with foolishchances. Hermes Pan's choreography ismore than just looking for a needle in a hay¬stack — it’s a “Night and Day” improve¬ment over Flying Down to Rio; no matterwhat they say about Top Hat, “They Can tTake That A wav From Me.” Wed., Feb. 2 at8:30 p.m. LSF. $2 — PFPlay It Again, Sam (1972) Herbert Ross(The Seven Percent Solution, The Last ofSheila, The Sunshine Boys) directed this ad¬aptation of Woody Allen’s play about a re¬cently divorced film buff, fumbling in theshadow of his idol, Humphrey Bogart, hojust can't seem to muster Casanova's grace.Ross’ collaboration makes Allen's humor more reserved, more “conventional,” and— to some extent — more delightful, thanAllen’s own directorial efforts. With DianeKeaton, Tony Roberts, and Susan Anspach.Thurs., Feb. 3 at 7:30 p.m. I-House. $2. —PFDouble Indemnity (Billy Widler, 1944) OnlyBilly Wilder could have exceeded EdmondGoulding’s Nightmare Alley in its uncom¬promising depiction of greed. James Cain’sstark, scintillating tale of murder, insur¬ance fraud, and betrayal among two ou-twardly-inconspicuous fellows, BarbaraStanwyck and Fred MacMurray, is one ofthe summits of film-noir suspense, a Chan¬dler-scripted masterpiece devoid of love orpity. Miklos Rozsa’s menacing score, andthe haunting strains of “Tangerine,” echoWilder’s mordant view of mankind, and lendconviction to why Edward G. Robinson (whoreceived, for the first time, third billing)ranked the film among his favorites. As onereviewer put it, “rather like fascinating rep¬tiles destroying each other.” Thurs., Feb. 3at 8:30 p.m. LSF. $2. — PFThe Woman in the Dunes (Hiroshi Teshiga-hara, 1964) We read in Focus that this is “anexistential view of man and the forces whichguide his life,” the ‘man/his’ part of whichmight be true were this a worse film than itis. Doc’s description makes it seem asthough only the man is trapped; by infer¬ence the title woman, who is also kept as aprisoner, is the trap. Not so in the film: whattraps them is either ’nature’ (the shiftingdunes the two shovel away every night) orsociety’ (the townspeople, mainly male,who imprison them and for whom they shov¬el). And it is on the whole the woman whofacilitates the man's new understanding offfreedom, and not his discovery of a methodof recovering water from the sand, as Docalso states. A very good film, beyond enter¬tainment, but not for the male/formal rea¬sons Doc advances. Thurs., Feb. 3 at 8 p.m.Doc. $2 — DMData ProcessingD.P.COORDINATORPart-timeOur growing southside bank is seeking a talentedindividual with interest and experience in the im¬plementation of computer systems. An upper levelor graduate student may find this position especiallychallenging.Your duties will include implementing proceduresfor applications and operation of our data process¬ing plans, in addition to consulting on developmentof system and selecting and evaluating software.Some training of users and day-to-day operation ofsystem may be involved also.To an ambitious and resourceful individual, thisposition offers great potential.Please send resume outlining relevant background,training and experience to:Tom MarrenDrexel National Bank3401 S. King DriveChicago, IL 60616equal opportunity employer m/f SPACE2 rooms, w/lots of restored wood plus Balconykit, walk-in closet. 58th & Blackstone. Non-smokers. 684-7248 after 4 p.m.1745 E. 55th St. 4 room 1 bedroom» S400 month Call Andy 363-78575515 E verett H2E 4 room 1 bedroom$400 month Call Carl 684-89005519 Everett if3N 3>/2 room 1 bedroom$350 month Call Carl 684-89005525 Everett 02W 5 room 2 bedroom$475 month Call Carl 684-89005529 Everett 03W 4 room 1 bedroom$375 month Call Carl 684-89003 bedrooms condominiums for sale 55th streetand Everett. Call 357-7926 evenings 979-6091days.Looking for housing? Check InternationalHouse, for grad, students and for scholarsvisiting Chicago. 753-2270, 2280.2 bd. 3 blks. to Reg. $410 -I- heat. Lndry, bale +rear porch 3 bd condo $650 52 + Dorch 643-4562.Clean quiet building 1V2 & 2’/2 studio apts newlydecorated included all utilities and appliances225.00 to 270.00 mth. 493-6250.IN THE HEARTOF HYDE PARKBeautiful studio apt. for rent. Agent onpremises. 5424 Cornell Ave. 324-1800.SPACE WANTEDNeed an efficiency apt. or furnished room nearUniversity March 1 thru July 31. Have appoint¬ment at Bar Center. Write or call Don Landon,Box 10064. Springfield, Mo. 65808. Phone (417)883 7869FOR SALEPASSPORT PHOTOS WHILE YOU WAIT!Model Camera 1342 E 55th 493-6700.51st & Kenwood. For sale by owner, completelyremodeled 1-*-bdrm condo, eat-in kitchen, gasfireplace, off street parking, sauna & exerciseroom. $49,000. Call Rod 955 4203.OLIVETTI LEXICON 83-DL Portable Professional Typewriter with BALL Element Superbcondition $250 call Scott after 6:30 p.m. 6431168.3-D.... NIMSLO 3-D camera. $149.00 afterrebate MODEL CAMERA 1342 E. 55th.TAPE SPECIAL!!... TDK SAC 90 $2 99MODEL CAMERA 1342 E. 55th.NIKONOS - The Best All-Weather CameraMoney Can Buy! Special... $289.00 MODELCAMERA 1342 E. 55th St. 493-6700PORTRAITS.... We Do Portraits!!!! MODELCAMERA 493-6700CalendarTUESDAYDOC: The Secret Agent 8 p.m. Cobb S2U. of C. Press: Exhibit of award-winning book de¬signs and illustrations 9-4 p.m. Admin. 400. FreeAmerican Meteorological Soc: Lecture: Dr. JamesF Crson on “Meteorological Activities in the Peo¬ple’s Republic of China” and "Environmental Im¬pacts of Implementing the Fuel Use Act of 1978” 7:30p.m. Hinds 101.Calvert House: Sacrament of Reconcilation 11:30a m.; Investigation into Catholicism 7 p.m.Crossroads: Beg. Chinese. All Levels 2 p.m.; IndianDance 7 p.m.WEDNESDAYRockefeller: Service of Holy Communion followedby Breakfbast 8 a.m.Court Theatre: Endgame 8 p.m. New Theatre - Call753-4472 for info.DOC: All Fall Down 8 p.m. Cobb $2LSF: The Gay Divorcee 8:30 p m. Law School Aud.$2U.C. Press: Exhibit of award winning designs andillustrations 9-4 p.m. Admin 400. FreePolitical Order and Change Lecture: Eric Cochrane"Machiavelli: The Prince in its Historical Context”4 p.m. Qunatrell Aud.U.C. Animal Welfare Group: Meeting 7:30 p m.INHTM Club: Group meditation 12:30 p.m. INHAerobic Dance: Free classes 5 p.m. INH Call Lily Li753-2249 for infoBridge Club: Duplicate Bridge Tournament 7 p.m.INHBadminton Club: 7:30 p.m. INH Gym My Toyota died! $25 buys my Sears 48 monthbattery. For $75: Sanyo Am/FM StereoCassette and 2 Pioneer 6 1/2“ speakers. Call752-5282.BOS TO CHI 1-way plane ticket 4 sale. 752-5033.'75 Plym Fury, 56,000 mi, air, full power, goodcond. best offer. 363-0447, eves.AMC Matador 1975. A/C, pwr. str., aut. tr, rdefog. 53,000 miles. $1,500. 962-8496or 799-6313.PEOPLE WANTEDPaid subjects needed for experiments onmemory, perception and language processing.Research conducted by students and faculty inthe Committee on Cognition and Communica¬tion, Department of Behavioral Sciences.Phone 962-8859.RIGHT HANDED SUBJECTS needed forstudies on brain functions and perception$3/hr. 962-8846.Artists, sailors, cooks, handymen wanted:work in a small, non-competative, children'ssummer camp. Must be flexible and open toworking with all kinds. Beautiful location formore info call Stephanie 955-0250 or writeCrystalaireCamp FrankfortMl 49635.OVERSEAS JOBS - Summer/year round.Europe, S. Amer., Australia, Asia. All Fields.$500-51200 monthly. Sightseeing. Free info.Write IJC Box 52-14-5 Corona Del Mar, CA92625SERVICESJUDITH TYPES-and has a memory. Phone955-4417.JAMES BONE, E DITOR TYPIST, 363-0522.PROFESSIONAL TYPING-reasonable rates,684 6882.Exp. Typist Turabian Phd Masters theses.Term papers Rough Drafts. 924-1152.TAROT READINGS by Elektra. Call 493-9330for an appointment.Psychologist forming therapy group in HydePark to change women's longstanding strug¬gles with uncontrolled eating RosalindCharney, Ph.D. 538-7022.Typing. Term papers, theses, etc. IBM Corrective Selectric. All projects welcome. 791-1674Passport photos while you wait. On Campus.Other photo services available. 962 6263.RESUMES TYPESET at LOW RATES byBiggs press of Hyde Park. Also typesetting anddesign of flyers, ads, programs, etc. Call 268-0289.I CLEAN apts., house, dorm rooms quickly,thoroughly. $4/hr. 684-5835 David EXPERIENCED.Crossroads: English Classes. All levels 2 p.m.; So¬cial Hour 3:30 p.m.; Beg. French 7:30 p.m.; Bog Ara-bic 7:30 p.m.; Beg German 7 p.m.Calvert House: Hunger Concern Group 8 p.m.THURSDAYNoontime Concert: Janet Kutulas, flute. Music ofRivier, C.P.E. Bach. 12:15 p.m. Goodspeed hall.FreeRockefeller Chapel: Choral Vesper Service 5:15p.m.; Chancel Choir Rehearsal 5:45 p.m.Talking Pictures: Play It Again, Sam 7:30 p.m. I-House $2 Free PopcornDOC: Woman in the Dines 8 p.m. Cobb 82LSF: Double Indemnity 8:30 p.m. Law School Aud$2Court Theatre: Endgame 8 p.m. New Theatre Call753-4472 for infoPersian Circle: Judy Wilkes on “Observations onBatani Parizi’s Article The Historical Personalitiesof the Masnavi of Mawlana.’ ” 12 p.m. Pick 218Physics Dept.: Collquium: Staley Whitcomb on"Gravitational Astronomy in the ’80’s” 4:30 p.m.Eck 133Comm, on Benetics: Colloquium. Dr. WilliamUpholt on “Expression of the Type II Pro-collagenGene During Chick Limb Cartilage Differentia¬tion.” 12 p.m. Zoo 14Chrsitian Science Organization: Meeting 7pmINHBrent House: Episcopal Eucharist 12 p.m. BondChapelU.C. Judo Club: Practice 6 p.m. BartlettCalvert House: Prayer Group 8 p.m.10-—The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February 1. 1983Classified AdsFREE Skin Care Demonstration available tormen and women in your home. A complete lineof comestics are also avilable. Call Marilyn at846-0313 for more information.PROFESSIONAL Typing: large or small jobs,competitive prices. 324-5943.SCENESWriters workshop PL 2-8377A showing of international award-winninguniversity press book designs 8. illustrations onexhibit at U of C Press. Feb 1-2, 9 a.m. - 4 p.m.,4th fir. 5801 S. Ellis. Admission free.Valentines Days Carnations: Feb. 1, 2, 3. CobbWoodward, Pierce , B.S. and Shoreland. ByShorey House anethe U.C. Democrats.Les Beaux Parleurs meets Wed. 8 PM at IdaNoyes to plan our Mardi Gras celebration. II yaura de crosissantset de lait et cafe. 643-5449.Montezuma's Revenge threatened the hierar¬chical structure of HCS. Therefore, 211 HCSmembers should attend this Wednesday'smeetings in Ida Noyes.WANTEDOSBORNE USERS: A DEC wants to play withyour PC: purpose interfacing, exploration, or?JUDITH TYPES 955-4417.PERSONALSMy Champagne caeri: Jet'aimePAPAYACHEEKS - It's true that you have thecutest pair...of little feet on campus.K. YTAMON H-Bday Feb. 3 Jg zpv gjivsfh uijtpvu zpv) mn hfu b cjh tvsqsjtf! Copacetic?L.V.What ever happened to the Hispanic CulturalSociety? No more meetings or activities?Ree-a,Thanks. I love super chocolate chipicecream, Ree-a, lets go the Smart Bar soon.Aggie-Long time no see. Happy BirthdayKURT.STEPTUTORINGHelp a child feel bright and intelligent.Volunteer to tutor elementary or highschoolstudents for two hours a week. Contact Mike at241-6394 (evenings) for more information.DELAYED MAIL SERVICESl/letter $5 for 20 send letters along with dateto be mailed to: P.O. Box 53352, Chicago, IL60653.PENTHOUSEAPARTMENT4 BEDROOM 4 BATH COOP ON LAKEMICHIGAN AT 73RD ST. $59,900!Nearly 4400 Square Feet with 3 Outside PatiosFireplace, Sunken Living Room, PrivateElevator, Circular Gallery Entryway. The Entire Top Floor!Call Mr. Brinnick 346-1500Sheldon Good + Company RealtorsZAP-BANG!!!HOVERTANK — the Newest and Most ExcitingSciencefiction Wargame in Years. Just Out byCLOSE SIMULATIONS. Eight geomorphic maps,over 100 counters, 16 Scenarios tor two or moreplayers, based on a clean simultaneous movementsystem. Try combat in the 21st century: $16.00plus $1 for postage and handling to CLOSESIMULATIONS, P.O. Box 2247, Northbrook, II.60062.DAWNin the South Atlantic... Suddenly a Harrier flysover and there is the sound of shells. The BritishInvasion has begun! This is “The FalklandsWar," not some cheap quickie design, but a detailed simulation of the battle based on top levelBritish sources, including participants in the bat¬tle. Every plane, ship and troop used by both sidesare in this simulation. Also included: a large threecolor map, over 100 counters, charts, rules andplayers' notes in an attractive bookshelt box. Thefight for the wind-swept islands is on! $14.00 plus$1 for postage and handling to CLOSE SIMULATiONS, P O. Box 2247, Northbrook, II 60062STUDIO APARTMENTStudio apartment available to sublet for March1st, furnished or unfurnished. Ideal forstudents. Call Tom after 6:00 pm at 752-1298 SUPERWYLBURMACRO PROGRAMMINGSUPERWYLBUR, a multi-purpose terminaloperating environment on the ComputationCenter's Amdahl computer, offers many uni¬que features to aid the computer user in com¬pleting tasks. One of these is its macro pro¬gramming facility, which allows a variety offunction to be performed automatically. Tolearn how to use this facility attend the FREEseminar on SUPERWYLBUR MACRO PRO¬GRAMMING, to be held on Wednesday,February 2, 1983, from 3:30 to 5:00 p m. inHarper 406. A prior general knowledge ofSUPERWYLBUR is assumed for this seminar.ESCAPE FROMHYDE PK.If you are witty, articulate, incisive, im¬aginative or dramatic, the Debating Societymay be your ticket to New England, Canada,or Peoria. The Society provides opportunites tocomplete, learn, 8. practice in numerousevents, including prose 8. poetry reading,dramatic 8. humorous interp & debate. Comein INH at 7pm Tues or Thurs for details. Nospeaking experience required. Grads &undergrads welcome.ATTN:SPEAKERSThe Debating Society offers numerious op¬portunities to speak, compete, practice, travel,& judge in all I.E. events, and as a Parliamen¬tary Debater. Contact the Debating Society inINH or come to INH 7 pm Tuesday 8,Thursdays for info. Grads & undergradswelcome.WILL PAY $400A MONTHTo 1 or 2 female U of C students to purchasefood weekly, to cook a delicious simple dinnerdaily, and do light housekeeping in a studioapartment at 55 st & Lake Shore Dr for retiredlady prof hours flexible ref exch phone 955-6728.JOIN OUR FEETFEAT!WANTED: Planning Committee Members for1983 HYDE PARK WALK WITH ISRAEL. Formore info call: 268-4600 days, 324-5727 Sun-Thurs. eves. HOTLINEDon't make rash decisions; your life is too im¬portant for that. Call 753-1777, talk it through,and get the information and referals you need.YOUR OPTION from 7pm-7am.AMUSICALSAMPLERDan Marson, Dave Rick and John Shibley ap¬pear at the Blue Gargoyle Thursday Feb. 3rdFolk, Ragtime and good tun music. Showstarts 9:00 Admission $1 Great food BG af 57thand Univ. Wanna Play BG? Call Ann 955-4108.HCS MEMBERSThere will be a meeting FE B 2 in IDA NOYES.Important matters will discussed. The Presi¬dent requests-our presence.UNIV.OF RQCHESTERAlumni. Social/Cultural Group. Grad Students& Faculty welcome. Call Steve Ross 440-5035(days) or Pat Yuzawa 288-8139. FEATURESWRITERSIf you're one of the regulars or would like to be,come to the Maroon office TONIGHT at 7:30for a meeting and new assignments. If youcan't make it, come to the general meetingSunday at 8.00pm or call and leave your name,phone number, and best times to call. Margo.REDLIGHTSPRODUCTIONSis available to make your next party a Success.DJing, lights, other services available. CallMike Conte at 241-6438 for info and ratesUNITED JEWISHAPPEALImmigration. Hospitals. Homes and centersfor senior citizens. Emergency aid for Jewishcommunities around the world In Israel, theUS, and elsewhere, the UJA helps people in allthese ways. We are one - and we need you tohelp in this spring's UC UJA-JUF campaign.For more info, call Dave at 493-7651.PHOTOGRAPHIC & OFFICEFILM MACHINE DEPTPROCESSINGRENTALSBATTERIESRADIOSFRAMES CAMERASPHOTO ALBUMSDARKROOM EQ.CASSETTE TAPERECORDERSVIDEO TAPEUNIVERSITY OF CHICAGOBOOKSTORE970 EAST 58 TH ST.You CanCatch The Wave..Thursday, February 10At Advanced Micro Devices, we're getting really good at what we do, andwe’re doing the right things the right way. We're on the leading edge of everycritical technology in the semiconductor industry. There’s still a lot more todo before we're Number One. If you’re good at what you do, talk to AMD andCatch the Wave.With your MBA, you can catch the wave with Advanced Micro Devices. AMD’swave carries the most exciting career opportunities in the semiconductorindustry with a company that just passed $300 million in sales, and has its sightsset on being a Fortune 500 company.Make an interview appointment at your Career Planning and PlacementCenter. Or, if you can’t make it on the above date, send your resume toBarbara Toothman, College Relations Manager, Dept. CN-UCM-210,Advanced Micro Devices, 901 Thompson Place, Sunnyvale, California94086.D AdvancedMicroDevices An equal opportunityemployer m/f/h. 962i7558The Chicago Maroon—Tuesday, February l, 1983—111K*.GSALE DATESFEB. 2-5USDA CHOICEBEEFSHORT RIBSCERTI-SAVER2 OZ. TINMC CORMICKBLACKPEPPER8 OZ. KRAFT'SCASINO CHEESEMONTEREYJACK6V2OZ. TINSOIL OR WATER PACKREG. 1.32 oSAVE 43cSTARKISTTUNARIPEBANANAS I4?39c1 198029“8 OZ. SWANSONCHICKEN-TURKEY-BEEFMEATPIES4 ROLL PACKNORTHERNBATHROOMTISSUE3 OZ. BAGRAMEN SUPREMEOR ENTALNOODLESECKRICHREG. OR BEEFSMOKEDSAUSAGE3 LB. BAGCRISPJONATHAN2/901 19Reg. 1.485/s1APP ES Reg. 32* each19889c28 OZ. CANRAGGEDY ANNWHOLETOMATOES 69 cDeg. 93-FINER FOODSSERVING53rd PRAIRIE SHORESKIMBARK PL A2A .■ 2911 VERNONrtnere >ou Aft A Vrant;*' But Orict EXPERT MECHANICAL SERVICEFOREIGN & DOMESTIC CARSTUNE-UP • BRAKE JOBS • ELECTRICALSHOCK ABSORBERS • OIL CHANGES • LUBESBATTERIES • MUFFLERS • AIR CONDITIONINGENCLOSED, SECURE, AND REASONABLY PRICEDPARKING FACILITIES — AN ALTERNATIVE TOPARKING ON THE STREETS THIS WINTERHYDE PARK GARAGE5508 SOUTH LAKE PARK • 241-622010% DISCOUNT ON MECHANICAL WORKWITH THIS COUPONPICK UP & DELIVERY AVAILABLE GRAFF &CHECK1617 E. 55th St.APARTMENTSFOR RENTLarge2Va,4 & 6 rm.apts.. cfmmfdutfeOxx/ificuicyBU8-5566r careersat the National Security Agency Fromthe very outset they will influence thegrowth and direction of .their fields ofspecialization They will work .n a chal¬lenging and stimulating environmentwhere matters affecting the security oftne nation-are par; of our day to day acti¬vity.Ypg .too can experience this worldqf opportunity and challenge^ any ofthese NSA career fieldsElectronic Engineering: Thereare opportunities in a variety, ofresearch and development projectsranging from individual equipments.to'very complex interactive systems invol¬ving large number's of microprocessorsmini-computers and computer graphicsProfessional growth rs ennancecfthroughinteraction with highly experienced NSAprofessionals and through contacts mthe. industrial and. academic-’ worldsFacilities tbr engineering analysis anddesign automation' are among, the bestavailableComputer Science: At NSA you IIdtscover orye of the largest computerinstallations In the -world with almostevery major vendor of computer equip-.;meqt represented NSA careers provide s of such disciplines as systemsana'vsis and design, scientific applica¬tions programming, data base manage¬ment systems, operating systems,computer netwcrking/secur'ty. andgraphics.Mathematics: You II worn ondiverseagency problems applying a variety ofmathematical disciplines. Specificassignments r.nicjht-•rneiude solvingcommunications-' elated problems,performinglong-range mathematicalresearch or evaluating new techniquesfor communications security.C The Rewards at NSANSA* offers a salary and benefit'program-that's truly competitive withqrivate industry There are assignments,for those who wish to. travel and abundantgoqd living in the Baltimore-Washingtonaiea torthose who wish to stay close tohome. -L; Countless cultural. historical,recreanona.l and educational opportun¬ities are just minutes away from NSA sconvenient suburdan location., To find out snore about NSA careeropportunities, schedule an ..interviewthrough your college placement officeFor additional information on the NationalSecurity Agericy. write to Mr WilliamShores. College Recruitment Officer. National Security Agency. Attn: M322(WES). Fort George G. Meade. Maryland20755 ;An Equal Opportunity Employer.U S. Citizenship Required.The National[©jT Securityw Agency"here learning never ends.