Lord Chester¬field carried acane. Seniors willemulate him to¬day. Batfo jHaroon Survey coursesfill as winter quar-t e r registrationopens.Vol. 27. No. 40. UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 2, 1926• - - - Price Five CentsWHAT OFIT?fyGeorgeMw&nstemThe Daily Illini, official organ ofthe voice of the good people ofChampaign County, has started wise¬cracking again. It was more or lessinevitable. This time the collegeboys of the Greatest State Universityhave let off steam in the form of an“All-American” football team, whichthe Twin Buroughs fellows sought tomake even more funny than ‘‘All-American” t^ams usually are by nam¬ing eleven of Mr. Stagg’s boys forthe places. Mr. Laurence Apitz, thescholarly end, was not put on theselection, Mr. Harold (Red) Grange,formerly an Illini himself, but nowsunk even lower, and serving as anewspaper writer for a mere hand-full of silver, having named Mr.Apitz as one of his ends on theGrange All-Conference, released inthe Hearst sheets recently. To putMr. Apitz on the team, therefore,would have obviously put either Mr.Grange or The Daily Illini in a ques¬tionable light—a thing to be avoided.So a fellow named “Hogan,” orsomething, was put on instead.* * * *It is a somewhat amusing conceit,this idea of The Illini’s, but not atall new. If I remember rightly, itis the same thing that was done nolater than five years ago to the Il¬lini themselves, by that great chron¬icle of the corn fields, The DailyIowan. Five years ago, I think itwas, was the season Mr. Zupp’:e’steam took its turn at consistent los¬ing, and not only dropped all itsConference games, but another so-called “practice” game to Butler,just coming up out of the obscurityof Indianapolis to a place of prestigeunder Mr. Harland Orville Page, nowof Indiana. Losing all of its gamesoccasionally will happen to anyteam—even that of the Draft Armyof the Greatest State University. TheDaily Illini, evidently, wrote its “All-American” fully conscious of thesmug Illinois superiority, and .the Il¬lini victory over the Maroons thisfall. Yet, I point out, Mr. Zuppke’shoys only won 7-0 over this teamwhich they ridicule as go low—andhad great difficulty in doing eventhat. And even if Illinois can get ateam out of its Ten Thousand sim¬ple boys, recruited from Maine toMontana, that is occasionally ableto beat a school that draws its teamfrom less than two thousand, thereoughtn’t to be such a lot of shoutingover it. ** * * *The whole thing is again, of courseentirely typical of Illinois and. TheDaily Illini. As Mr. Zuppke saidof his team to my brother over onStagg Field the Friday afternoon Il¬linois was working out before theChicago game, “They’re just dumbenough to make a good game of it.”So with The Daily Illini; it’s justdumb enough to satisfy the TenThousand deadheads of the GreatestState University.* * * *By the way, * here’s somethingclipped out of the “Illini News” col¬umn of my town paper, the OakLeaves, a journal as great, noble,a°d funny in its own way as TheDaily Illini in its “The junior promis a very exclusive affair, and ticketsare sold only to juniors with the cor¬rect number of hours of credit. Thisyear thumb prints were made of allthose who bought tickets, in order tocheck up on them at the door andmake certain that no tickets changehands. Those on the preferred listare names prominent in campus ac¬tivities and athletics.” Merely anoth¬er indication of the “Illinois mind”—a thing, I am sure, which would makea very curious study for any psy¬chologist with nothing better to en¬gage him for the time. DEAN G. J. LAINGHURT IN WRECK;BACK TOMORROWTrain Is Derailed on HisReturn from Tourin CanadaReturning to Chicago from To¬ronto, after having delivered a seriesof lectures, Dean Gordon JenningsLaing of the Graduate School of Artswas injured in an accident on theWabash lines, Saturday, Nov. 20. Hesustained a broken rib, a torn mus¬cle in his back and a few minor in¬juries when four of the coaches onthe train were derailed. The sectionin which Dean Laing was riding roll¬ed down a forty foot embankment.While in Montreal and Toroto,Dean Laing together with StephenLeacock, the humorist, had given aseries of lectures to the students atMcGill University and to the Can¬adian club and the University clubof Montreal.Dean Laing was Dean of Arts andScience at McGill university for twoyears before coming to the Univer¬sity.Miss Ortha Leslie Wilner, instruc¬tor in the Latin department will meetDean Laing’s class, Latin 385, dur¬ing his absence. Dean Laing’s con¬dition is reported to be considerablyimproved and he intends to resumeduties on campus tomorrow.Drake IntroducesNew Keutzer Hit;Lopez Lauds Song“Just as the Day is Done,” a waltzcomposed by Clyde Keutzer, BetaTheta Pi, is fast becoming one ofthe popular hits in dance circles oitoday. It was introduced by BobbyMeeker’s Orchestra at the Drake ho¬tel last Wednesday.Two orchestras in New York CityVincent Lopez’ Orchestra and Leon¬ard’s Orchestra which plays at theWaldorf Astoria hotel are featuringthe piece. Vincent Lopez said ofthe song, “It is one of the best waltzpieces I have heard in years.”Paul Ash is going to feature Keut-zer’s song at some time in the future.At this time Keutzer will probablysing the song in connection with PaulAsh’s show’.NOVA SCOTIA PAPERREQUESTS EXCHANGEWITH DAILY MAROONAn indication of The Daily Ma¬roon’s widespread fame is shown bythe request of the Galhousie Ga¬zette for an exchange of publications.Galhousie university is located atHalifax, Nova Scotia and is the mostnorthern and eastern institution ofthis character in America. Size andlocation have not interefered withits attainments. It has produced achampionship English rugby footballteam, the third best dental school onthe continent, and a hockey teamthat has “crossed sticks with Har¬vard.”Postpone Date Of“Un Double Aveu”“Un Double Aveu,” written by amodern French author, which wasscheduled for presentation today,has been postponed for two weeks.The play will be given at a meetingThursday, Dec. 16 with Irene Bas¬sett and Beatrice Watson in the cast.Mr. John L. Balljs Jr., instructor inFrench will speak at the meeting to¬day at 4:30 at the Maison Francaise,5810 Woodiawn Avenue. Campus FreshmanShot By BurglarWilliam Bolton, 17 year old T.K. E. pledge, who was shot in theright thigh by a colored burglarTuesday afternoon, is reported byattending physicians as doing aswell as can be expected.Bolton was surprised by theburglar in the Bolton home, 4308Greenwood Avenue. The prowlerwas heard moving about in thehallway, and although Bolton hada revolver in his hand, the burglarfirst fired when he stepped intothe hallway. The man escapedthrough a rear door.Bolton was taken to the JohnB. Murphy hospital by the policeimmediately following the shoot¬ing in his home.SCHILLER LAUDEDBY PROF. MOOREGerman Philosopher LecturesToday at 4:30“Dr. Schiller, outstanding represen¬tative of pragmatic philosopny in Eu¬rope today is a vividly clear writerand speaker. His many ieetures andliterary works are all characterizedby a saving sense of humor.”That was the tribute paid to Dr.F. C. S. Schiller of Oxford univer¬sity, by Prof. Addison W. Moore ofthe LTniversity philosophy depart¬ment. Dr. Schiller is to speak on“William James and the Making ofPragmatism” today at 4:30 in Har¬per M-ll. He has recently com¬pleted a tour of western collegeswhere he gave similar lectures.Dr. Schiller, now at the heightof his literary career, has contribut¬ed among his works: “Riddles of theSaints,” “Studies in Humanism.” and“Critiqu’e of Logic,” which he hasjust recently finished. “Tantalus orThe Future of Man” is his repre¬sentative work in the “Today and To¬morrow” series.Jane Addams ToSpeak At SocialService BanquetMiss Jane Addams, founder of HullHouse and prominent social worker,will speak before dinner to be givenby the Social Service club tonight at6:30 in Ida Noyes hall. The subjectMiss Addams has chosen for her talkis, “Recent National Conferences.”Along with her work-in supervis¬ing Hull House, Miss Addams haswritten several books. “Democraticand Social Ethics,” “The Spirit ofYouth and the City Streets,” “Peaceand Bread in Time of War,” and“Newer Ideals of Peace” are a fewof the titles which give an insightinto her interests. Founding HullHouse, engaging in club activities,and taking an interest in politicsfrom a social standpoint, character¬ize Miss Addams’ pursuits.Avoid crowds.Germs thrive incrowds. SCHEOULESENIORDINNER FOR NEXTFRIDAY EVENINGAllison and Graham Chair¬men of Tickets Committee;Sell After ChapelTickets for the Senior Class din¬ner, to be held Friday, Dec. 10 asthe first official function of the classwill be on sale immediately at theclose of Senior chapel today. Th.*ymay be obtained from all membersof the Senior Class council at seven¬ty-five cents apiece. John Allisonand Betty Graham are acting as co-chairmen of the ticket committee.The dinner is expected to be oneof the elaborate social affairs of theseason. Many features are beingplanned to make the occasion a galacelebration. “The festivity shouldmeet with enthusiastic approval asonly a few class social affairs remainbefore plans of convocation andgraduation assail the Seniors,” saysJohn Meyer, senior class president.Committees on arrangements areplanning on an attedance of morethan two hundred seniors. Arrange¬ments have been completed for hold¬ing the dinner in Ida Noyes hallpromptly at 6 :15.Members are urged to purchasetheir tickets 'today and thus great¬ly facilitate matters and assist thevarious committees.Place Blame OnStudent DrivingIn Death TrialGeorge Smith, negro, charged withthe responsibility for the deaths ofCharles Mickelberry and WilliamBohan, last winter was freed by ajury in Judge William Lindsay’svcourt. After five minutes of deliber¬ation, the foreman announced theverdict of “not guilty!”The case came to trial last week,although the accident occurred lastspring when the boys were going to Ian Alpha Delta Phi dance in OakPark. They met Smith’s car in ahead-on collision on the outer drivein Grant Park on June 11.Harriet Stover, former studenthere, was the only witness in thecase. The other girl who was in thecar at the time of the accident, Nat¬alie Trese, is still confined in St.Luke’s hospital, suffering from abroken hip bone.HUGE RED CHIMNEYHOLDS GRAB-BAG ATY. W. C. A. BAZAAR“Get grabby” has been chosen byClair Davis and Margaret Newton,co-chairmen of the grab bag commit¬tee, as the slogan of the Freshmangrab bag booth at the Y. W. C. A.Christmas Bazaar, Dec. 10, in IdaNoyes hall.In accordance with the Christmasspirit, a novel receptacle in the formof a huge red and white chimney hasbeen chosen to help carr# out thisidea. Twenty-five cents, paid to oneof the two Santa Claus attendants,will entitle the “grabber” to one ofthe various novelties to be had in thechimney.Harold F. GosnellIll With PleurisyMr. Harold Gosnell, assistant pro¬fessor in the Political Sdiehce de¬partment, who has be*n sufferingfrom pleurisy, is improving rapidly.He was ill in his home for ten daysbefore he was removed to the Pres¬byterian hospital where he has beenfor three weeks. Assistant Profes¬sor J. Kerwin, believes that Mf- Gos¬nell will resume his classes in abouta week. Where Ignorance IsBliss, It Is FollyCould you quote more than onepage of the Bible or Shakespeare?According to Mr. Frank K.Reilly, president of the Reilly andLee Publishing Company of Chi¬cago and head of the White Pa¬per club, in a recent address be¬fore members of Mr. FrankO’Hara’s newswriting class, aknowledge of these two highpoints of literature is essential tosuccessful writing.W’hen Mr. O’Hara corroboratedthe publisher’s belief and present¬ed the above question at a classmeeting no one volunteered ananswer. The class blinked. It ex¬pected one member at least to at¬tempt to give a quote. But therewas a complete silence.CHINA BENEFITSBY NATIONALISMYank Publisher CommendsChinese GovernmentThe Nationalist movement inChina, in spite of many and seriousmistakes of its leaders and adherentsis at base a wholesome developmentbecause it is a manifestation of agrowing interest in and feeling ofresponsibility for the affairs of gov¬ernment, according to Grover Clark,editor and publisher of the PekingChina Leader, who spoke at the Uni¬versity Tuesday afternoon.%Though pointing out that “it wouldbe a grave mistake to overlook theanti-foreign aspects of the nation¬alist movement,” the speaker con¬tended that “the great majority to¬day are realizing that China’s essen¬tial problem is domestic, not foreign,and that order, stability and decentgovernment can be secured only bya good deal of patient, hard spadework in educating the people.Campus Women At“Y” Open HouseIn Reynolds ClubCampus women, for the first timein the history of the University, willbe the guests of the Y. M. C. A. atits open house and tea this afternoonat 4 in the south lounge of the Rey¬nolds club. Students of Methodist idenomination are especially invitedto attend this session and specialmeeting afterward. Entertainmentwill be provided by a string triowhich Edwarda Williams, violinist,will direct.Dr. Gilbert Cox of Woodlawn M.E., and Rev. F. J. Schnell, of St.James M. E., will speak at the Meth¬odist meeting and lead in a discus¬sion.All subsequent “Y” entertain¬ments will be in the nature of grouparrangements, having always oneschool organization as special guest.You 7/ BeInterestedin the winning manuscripts andauthors of the 1927 Blackfriars’production. The complete storywill be released in the Christmasedition of the Daily Maroon.This issue will not only be the larg¬est in the history of your newspaperbut it will be the best.Read this column every day andsee why! We’re not bragging.THE DAILY MAROON UNIVERSITY GETS$415,000 GIFTFROM FINANCIERG. H. Jones Donates FortuneFor Chemical Equipmentand EndowmentThe University has received fromMr. George Herbert Jones, directorof the Inland Steel Company, a giftof $415,000 for the equipment andendowment of chemistry. Plans arealready being formed by the Univer¬sity for the construction of the Geo.Herbert Jones chemical research lab-oratory which is to be the first unitof new laboratories devoted to fun¬damental investigations in chemistryand its relation to medicine and in¬dustry. Additional units will be add¬ed as funds gre contributed.Because it provides maintenancefor one of the basic sciences uponwhich the new $20,000,000 medicalprogram of the University has beenerected, University officials regardthe gift as extremely important bothto the Midway institution ^nd to thecity of Chicago as a medical center.Modern chemistry bringing new andessential discoveries in the form ofdrugs, serums and the like, demandsa new and efficient type of laboratorythey say.“Therefore,” according to Prof. Ju¬lius Stieglitz, head of the chemistrydepartment, “the staff and graduatestudent body are happy for this re¬lease from the handicaps of the pastand present—handicaps resultingfrom the fact that the present chem¬ical laboratory, a gift of the lateSydney A. Kent and erected 1893,could not anticipate either the rev¬olutionary progress made in chemis¬try in the last thirty years or the vastincrease in the interest in chemistry.“When the full building programhas been completed, Kent chemicallaboratory will be used wholly forundergraduate work and all of thegraduate work will be housed in thenew buildings. These proposed exten¬sions will also provide opportunityfor developing research fields ofchemistry not now intensively culti¬vated at the University. Such fieldsare, photosynthesis, (the formation offood products in plants with the aidof sunlight,) metallurgy, colloidchemistry and synthetic organicchemistry which are of great import¬ance to progress in medicine.“The new laboratory, provided forso generously by Mr. Jones, will beused exclusively for the investiga-(Continued on page 2)FILL FIRST COURSESAS WINTER QUARTERREGISTRATION OPENSGeneral registration which beganTuesday will continue until Friday,Dec. 10, announces the dean’s office.However, in spite of the fact thatregistration is hardly more than be¬gun, several courses have alreadybeen filled. All survey courses andespecially General Survey 101, ratehighest in popularity. English 130,131, and 132 are much sought afterwhile Philosophy 104, and Prof. Nel¬son’s Advanced Public Speaking arejammed to capacity. Students wish¬ing to make changes in their registra¬tion programs will be permitted todo so until Dec. 10.Probation MembersEntertain SpeakersProbation members will entertainthe Women’s Speakers club tonightfrom 7 to 8 in the theater of IdaNoyes hall. Participants in the pro¬gram will be Ameda Metcalf, BettyStarr, Naomi Marker, ElizabethRunyan, Sarah Zidell and EstherZumdahl. Formal initiation will takeplace at the next meeting of the.club, Thursday, Dec. 16. VPage Two THE DAILY MAROON, THURSDAY, DECEMBER 2, 1926uty? Daily HlarntmFOUNDED IN 1901THE OFFICIAL STUDENT NEWSPAPER OF THE UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGOPublished morning*. except Saturday. Sunday and Monday, during the Autumn,Vinter and Spring quarters by The Dally Maroon Company. Subscription rates:'Sno ti«»r year: by mail. $1.00 per year extra. Single copies, five cents each.Entered as second-class mall at the Chicago Postoffice. Chicago, Illinois, March 18.'SOfl. under the act of March 3, 1878.The Dally Maroon expressly reserve* all rights of publication of any materia)«ooearlng in this paperOFFICE—ROOM ONE, ELLIS HALL5804 Ellis AvenueTelephones: Editorial Office. Midway 0800, Local 245; Business Office.Fairfax 0977. Sports Office, Local 80, 2 RingsMember of the Western Conference Press AssociationThe StaffWalter G. Williamson, Managing EditorMilton H. Kreines, Business ManagerJohn P. Howe, Chairman of the Editorial BoardRuth G. Daniel, Women’s EditorEDITORIAL DEPARTMENT BUSINESS DEPARTMENTEldred L. Neubauer Advertising ManagerAlice Kinsman Literary EditorTom Stephenson Sports EditorGeorge Jones News EditorGeorge L. Koehn News Editor Burton McRoy — AuditorRobert Massey Classified Adv. Mgr.Robert Fisher Sophomore AssistantA1 Widdifield News EditorRoselle F. Moss Junior’EditorBetty McGee Assistant Sports EditorRobert Stern Assistant Sports EditorVictor Roterus Assistant Sports EditorGeorge Morgenstern Day EditorMilton Mayer Day EditorStewart McMullen Day EditorKathryn Sandmeyer Sophomore EditorHarriett Harris Sophomore EditorHarriett Lemon Sophomore Editor Edward D. Hagens Sophomore AssitantRobert Klein Sophomore AssistantMyron Fulrath Sophomore AssistantHarry E. Axon. Jr Sophomore AssistantDonald Gallagher Sophomore AssistantJack McBrady Sophomore AssistantWallace Nelson Sophomore AssistantTHE OPEN DOOR“McCHEESECAKE," the Chairman of the Editorial Board ap-proached blandly, grinning one of those good-fellows-get-to-gether grins, “McCheesecake, how about an editorial?”“An editorial?” we gasped.“Yes,” he reiterated, “an editorial. For the editorial columnyou know.”We knew. »“On what subject shall we write this editorial?” we queried.“Oh,” he replied casually, “you may utilize for your purposeany one of the several planks of the Editorial Platform of this Paper.”“And just what is the Editorial Platform of this Paper?”The Chairman of the Editorial Board recoiled at this question,but in a few moments he assumed the poise and composure typicalof Chairmen of Editorial Boards. “As a member of the EditorialBoard (our chest swelled with pride), “as a member of theEditorial Board,” he pronounced loftily, “you are expected to beconversant with each and every plank of the Editorial Platform ofthis Paper.”We were nonplussed, as the boys say. We pondered. Howabout our plank asking for an open door to the Coffee Shop until10 P. M.?““Excellent!“ the Chairman of the Editorial Board exclaimed.“A capital idea!” And after a few moment of silence; “Look here,old bean: try to strike a new note this time. About two hundredfifty words. I must be off to water polo practice.”The Chairman of the Editorial Board donned his coat.“So long,” he said.“Saloon,” we rejoined.And as the back of the Chairman of the Editorial Board dis¬appeared in the offing, we chuckled. That s a horse on the Chair¬man of the Editorial Board,” we chuckled again. “He is ostensiblygoing to practice water polo, whatever that may be, for the dear oldAlma Mater. He is actually bound for the Coffee Shop, whereinto warm his gullet with a cup of coffee (5c with sugar and cream;4c with cream; 3c in the saucer; 2c out of the percolator). Wechuckled a third time. “It’s one minute past five,” upon scrutiniz¬ing our watch, and the Coffee Shop is closed. We chuckled afourth time, and sat down to write.‘‘NUMBER ONE”jUR STAGG S GRIDIRON will be bereft of any evidences of theFifty-fifth street business men’s association next year. KenRouse, the new captain, will not wear the “55“ of the grocery storesand ribbon counters. Not that he has anything against the 55th StreetBusiness Men’s Association, for indeed they are among the team’smost loyal and enthusiasic supporters, but rather because he feelsthat the football squad should bear no evidences of commercialism.Ken Rouse will resume the traditional captain’s numeral: “1”.This year has probably been a true innovation as far as super¬courtesy to business on the gridiron is concerned. With the returnto the captain’s traditional “1” that number will probably be a perm¬anent fixture. It will mean that there is not a single characteristic inevidence at a football game of anything commercial or professional,unless it is the aerial advertisements which float in gaudy predomi¬nance over the field. WHAT’S ON TODAYReverend Perry J. Stackhouse ofthe First Baptist Church, Chicago,will speak at 11:50 in the JosephBond chapel.\Dr. F. C. S. Schiller of Oxford uni¬versity, London, will lecture on “Wil¬liam James and the Making of Prag¬matism” at 6:45 in Harper M-ll.Bacteriology club will meet at4:30 in Ricketts 7. Mr. Mallmannwill speak on “Bacillary White Diar¬rhea in Chickens.”Mr. G. E. Read will speak on “TheScattering of Protons in VariousGases” before the Physics club at4 :30 in Ryerson 32.“Heart Disease” will be discussedby W. W. Hamburger M. D. at 8:05over Station WMAQ.Second cabinet of Y. W. C. A.will meet at 3:30 in the Y. W. roomof Ida Noyes hall.Freshman women will lunch atnoon in Ida Noyes hall. UNIVERSITY GETSGIFT OF $450,000FROM FINANCIER(Continued from page 1)tional work of the staff and the fiftyto eighty research students normallyenrolled in the department. The lab¬oratory will be characterized by smallprivate rooms in which expensiveand elaborate apparatus can be builtup and used without disturbance andby special laboratories for work atconstant temperatures, with hightemperatures, with high potentialelectric currents, for continuous dayand night work, etc.Senior! Today’sThursday! HaveYou Your Cane?As an emblem of their seniority,men of the graduating class will car¬ry canes again on campus tomorrow.This is the fourth day set aside forsenior canes.The committee in charge reportsthat as yet they have not been forcedto bathe any classmates in the bot¬any pond, and adds that it is gettinga bit chilly.50c WAVESSaturday 75cLICENSED OPERATORS •KENNEDY SHOPS1455 E. 63rd St. 6351 Cottage Grove Ave.Dorchester 3755 Plaza 1060-10615226 Harper Ave.Hyde Park 2408TOWER63 RD AND BLACKSTONE The Frolic TheatreDRUG STOREAdjacent to Frolic TheatreCigarettes Fountain ServiceTel. H. Park 0761Corner Ellis Avenue and 55th St. Congregational ClubViews Comic Opera“The Three Flowers,” a tragic-comic opera, will be presented by thewomen students of the Congrega¬tional Training school before theCongregational club at 7:45 this eve¬ning at 1154 East 58th street. Theprogram will also consist of selec¬tions by Jenkins, violinist, MarthaBarwick, pianist, Francis Holt, dram¬atic reader and Gertrude Holmes whowill give a pantomine. Ingwersen’s RecordIowa City, la., Dec. 3.—HowardJones, the coach, who built the Uni¬versity championship football teamsin 1921 and 1922, was not as suc¬cessful in his first three years as wasBurton Ingwersen, the present men¬tor.Jones’ teams won thirteen games,lost ten and tied none over the threeyear period.Ingwersen’s three elevens havewon fourteen, lost nine and tied one.MAY POWERS MILLERTeacher of Piano1352 E. 55th Street STUDIOS 1810 W. 103rd St.Hyde Park 0950 Beverly 5009FOR THE PARTICULAR STUDENTSH ALL’SRESTAURANT“The Sign of Good Food”5500 Harper Ave.Most Exclusive But Not the Most Expensive.^jhfiAjunrv. CSaacaxjJcVAUDEVILLE~4ND THE BESTFEATUREPHOTOPLAYSComplete ChaiseOf Program EverySuijday & ThursdayBARGAIN A 11 V ADULTSmatinusUAILI 30^JUST THE PLACE TO SPENDAN AFTERNOON OR EVENINGFRESH FLORIDAORANGESFresh sweet Florida Oranges $3per box of three hundred largesize. Sound fruit and satisfac¬tion guaranteed or money back.We pay express charges. A box ofthese makes an appreciated Christ¬mas gift. Remit with order.ACME FARMSGainesville, Florida.Take bar around in aSaunders System Car. Two’scompany—drive it yourself.Costs from V4 to V4 as muchas taxi. Use it as your ownas long as you like. Rent anew Sedan, Coach, Coupe orTouring car any time.8AUNDBM SYSTEMPHO^JE H. P. 21001121 E. 63rd St.SAUNDERSDrive It YourseSYSTEMA(d IComingThe Dance Sensation of the YearDECEMBER FOURTHPAUL WHITEMANAND HIS ORCHESTRAof 32 ArtistsMain Dining Room and Avenue of PalmsTHE DRAKEalso BOBBY MEEKER’S DRAKE ORCHESTRACover Charge—$6.60 Per Person(Including Tax)Formal at Ten Direction of Gladys AndesMake Reservations NOW! Phone Superior 2200As this unit be Mr. Whiteman’s only appearance in Chicago for dancing it is imperative• that early reservations be made. Program arranged by Courtesy of Benson of Chicago, Inc.I-M Swim CarnivalPreliminaries Today at3:30. Bartlett Tank. The Daily SPORTS Maroon\Thursday Morning December 2, 1926 Fritz Crisler t oCoach Varsity BaseballTeam.TOUCHBALL TEAMS TIE IN SEMI-FINALSCRISLER COACHES BASEBALLKAPPA NU COPS HORSESHOETITLERINGER BY KLAFFBRINGS VICTORYIN CLOSE MATCHFirst Greek Champion InThree Years; DefeatPhi Kappa SigmaPlaying in the horseshoe champion¬ship finals for the third time in suc¬cessive years, Kappa Nu defeated PhiKappa Sigma yesterday in a closelycontested match which balanced dan¬gerously for each team until Klaffended the second and deciding gamewith a ringer on a 20-19 score.Ringer* ValuableIn each of the three teams matedthe score went to a 1-1 tie withBalch and Kutner winning the firstmatch for Kappa Nu. The most ex¬citing game of the contest wasCooper-Erickson vs. Klaff-Gettle-man. The first game waswon by the Phi Kaps when Cooperdropped two ringers to win 21-10. Inthe second match Klaff and Gettle-man looped several ringers to tie thescore in games. Klaff featured withtwo stake shots in succession. Thedecisive third match showed skillfulplaying on both sides with the victorin doubt until Klaff’s timely ringer.More Ringer*In the third match the score wasI’hi Kap 1 and Kappa Nu 1 withHeinibach’s ringer making the score8.4 in favour of the latter for thethird game. The final settlement ofthe other games ended this matchbefore the winners were decided.For the last two years Kappa Nuhad lost out in the finals to theMacs, non-fraternity champions. Thisis the first time in three years thatthe University trophy goes to theGreeks. Bob Wolff MakesAll-Star ElevenKen Rouse and Laurie Apitz arenot the only Chicago grid mento receive all-star recognitionthis year. Robert Wolff veteranguard, has been placed on an all-American selection by Joseph C.Godfrey, Jr., appearing in the De¬cember issue of College Humor.The entire outfit, called the “All-American Animal Eleven” is asfollows:Lamb, L.*E., Coe.Baer, L. T., Michigan.Wolf, L. G. ChicagoBull, C., Union College.Wolf, R. G., Florida.Swan, R. T., Stanford.Fox, R. E., Haskell.Fox, Q. B., Redlands.Fox, L. H. B., Northwestern.Fox, R. H. B., San Diego State.Crabb, F. B., Pittsburgh.TO REORGANIZEU. RIFLE CLUBUniversity Rifle Club, which hasbeen more or less inactive during thepast year due to lack of financial sup¬port has been reorganized. Throughthe influence of the president’s office,the necessary support has been ob¬tained.“The club has one of the finestranges in the country and excellentcoaches. W. Garlington, president ofthe Illinois State Rifle Association,is coach for the women, and R. D.Bensley, coach for the men, is oneof the best rifle shots in the tl. S.,”said Charles J. Chamberlain, formerRifle Club coach.The University is heating andlighting the range .and furnishing theinstructors. Rifles and instruction(Continued on page 4)Drop Graded Gym Requirement forWomen; Registration Is OptionalGraded gym will not be requiredthis winter quarter according to anew policy adopted by the women’sphysical education department. Reg¬istration will be optional as it hasbeen in fall and spring. Students willchoose the sport they wish to takeand elective classes will meet fourdays a week instead of two as hasheretofore been the case. Gradedgym has been scratched off the sched¬ule, and Danish gymnastics, an op¬tional course, is being offered in itsplace.Miss Margaret L. Burns, instruc¬tor in the women’s physical educationdepartment of the University, whostudied under Nils Buch, originatorof Danish gymnastics, while in Eu-Tope last year, contrasted them withgraded gym. “Nils Buch has evolvedan interesting system of gymnastics,”said Miss Burns. “They are not atall like the graded gym we usedBARGAIN IN BOOKS3 sets 10 volumes each, beauti¬fully illustrated and bound. Goodas new.THE WORLD BEST ORA-IIONS. De-lux edition. CROWN¬ED MASTERPIECES OF LITER¬ATURE, University Edition.Both these sets contain works1 rom the earliest period to thepresent.Story of the greatest nations.1 rom the dawn of history to pres¬ent time.Phone Normal 2853 to have here. They resemble a gamemore than they do calisthenics.There is rapid change of movementfrom one part of the body to an¬other and the pupil must be on thealert constantly in order to performthe various exercises correctly. Thereis nothing slow about Danish gym¬nastics. They move rapidly andwithout any breaks. In addition totheir value as an exercise they offera means of recreation. They are realplay, real fun, “not just the regularcut and dried type of gymnastics.”Danish gymnastics have beengrowing in popularity within the lastfew years. Nils Buch was in thiscountry two years ago with a groupof Danes, giving demonstrations andthe Y. W. C. A. and other organiza¬tions have responded to the populardemand for this new type of exerciseby organizing classes. Now thatDanish gymnastics are being offeredWilliam R. Rothstein’sNEW MOULINROUGE CAFE416 South WabashTONIGHT!HALHIXONLATE of the “ZIEGFELD FOLLIES”& Hi* Boy Friend HARRY HARTHeading a NewCOLOSSAL REVUEFRED HAMMand the Boas’ Own OrchestraDoors Open 8 F. M. Till ClosingFor Reservations PHONE HAR. 8220 COACH NORGRENDEVOTES TIME TODRILLING CAGERS“Fritz” Well Fitted For NewJob; Will StartPractice EarlyIt was officially announced at theathletic offiice, yesterday, that Herb“Fritz” Crisler would assume the du¬ties of coaching the future varsitybaseball teams of the University ofChicago, as the successor to CoachNels Norgren.This change came about throughthe desire of Coach Norgren to de¬vote all his time to the tutoring ofthe squad of basketball aspirants. Itis necessary that the baseball squadstarts indoor practice before the bas-keball season is over, and the changewill mean that both coaches can de¬vote more time to their respectiveteams.To Start EarlyCoach Crisler hopes to get a flyingstart on the coming baseball seasonby commencing practice in the earlypart of the winter quarter. He, inaddition to this, will continue tocoach the freshmen basketball squad.Coach Crisler is well equipped totake over his new duties, through hisplaying experience as a stellar pitch¬er on the Maroon nine and his ex¬perience as former Freshmen Base¬ball Coach.Coach Crisler starred as a memberof the Maroon baseball teams of ’20,’21, and ”22 making the trip to theorient in 1921. He was one of themost consistent twirlers on the squadand duly commanded thA respect ofall Maroon opponents.Crisler is at present making aspeaking tour throughout the coun¬try, talking on athletics and theirimportance in the lives of the youthsof today. His successor to coachFreshmen Baseball has not yet beenannounced.at the University, the women’s physi¬cal education department expects arapidly increasing interest to developin them here.“People from all over the worldcome to the little town of Ollerup,Denmark, where Nils Buch has hisschool, to enroll in his classes,” saidMiss Burns. “His reputation is worldwide and interest in his gymnastics iskeen. Besides studying under BuchI visited three physical educationschools for women and saw hockeymatches between preparatory school,college, professional, territorial andinternational teams.” ’27 Maroon GridOpener More ThanA 1‘Practice” GameAlthough termed a “practicegame,” the contest which Coach A.A. Stagg has scheduled for the open¬ing battle on his next year’s grid cardthreatens to be a tough one.It is with Benny Owen’s Univer¬sity of Oklahoma ele’ven, one of theleading members of the MissouriValley Conference, and always famedfor a highly deceptive and intricateforward passing game. Oklahomalost one game this season, defeatingMissouri, the team that upset Stagg’s1924 champs, in a hard game. Nextyear’s meeting will be the first foot¬ball relationship between the twoschools in their respective athletichistories.This games adds another intersec¬tional contest to the long list of sim¬ilar battles which have been placedon the early season schedules of re¬cent Maroon teams. Former inter-sectional games were with Missouri,Kentucky, Florida, Maryland, Geor¬gia, Colorado, Pennsylvania, Dart¬mouth and Princeton.SEVEN TEAMS ONWRESTLING CARDLack of space in yesterday’s Maroon did not permit the printing ofthe wrestling schedule among thoseof the other varsity teams. It istherefore here presented:Jan. 15. .Michigan State at MichiganStateJan. 21. . . .Northwestern at ChicagoJan. 28 Minnesota at MinnesotaFeb. 5 Iowa at ChicagoFeb. 12 Illinois at IllinoisFeb. 19 Wisconsin at ChicagoMar. 5 Place meetThe Conference Meet will be heldthe 11th and 12th of March in Bart¬lett Gym.According to Coach Vorres men towrestle in the heavyweight class arebadly needed. As yet none have ap¬peared at practice and it is neces¬sary, if Chicago is to enter a wellrounded team in the title race thatmen of over 175 pounds report to thecoach at once. Men in all otherweights are also desired.It is expected that before the reg¬ular schedule starts there will be afew dual meets with the local clubs.One of the traditional rivals in thisgroup ate the Hawthorne Rivals.Few men have returned from lastyear’s squad. Store is back at 115lbs. Sternfield at 125, Kirks at 145,Penstone at 158, and Captain Krogh,last year’s Conference champion, at175. Expected to fill the ranks at115 135, 145, and 175 classes arefreshmen numeral winners from lastyear.LAST CHANCEONLY 2 DAYS LEFT TO BUYCAP and GOWN, 1927at $422ON SALE AT IDA NOYES ANDREYNOLDS CLUB CLOAKROOMS ANDCAMPUS SALESWOMEN PSI UPSILON, DETA HON,MACS, PHI SIGS IN DEADLOCK;PRELIMS FOR SWIM MEET TODAYSeveral Strong Teams EnterStars; Finals, FeatureEvents FridayThe preliminaries of the ThirdAnnual Swimming will be run off thisafternoon at 3:30. The entries havecome in from almost every organiza¬tion on the campus. The Chi Psi’s,Sig Chis, Delta Sigs and Phi Psishave all entered strong squads andhave hopes of copping the meet. Itwill be a big day for the I-M division.Over 300 men have entered this car¬nival and the waters of Bartlett poolwill be in constant agitation all after¬noon and many are the boys who willrub down with liniment tonight.Preliminaries in every event willbe run in several heats and the timemade by the contestants will decidewhether or not they will be admit¬ted to the finals on Friday. Five menwill qualify for every race and asfive places count there will be keencompetition for a chance to go intothe finals. Swimmers have beenworking out in Bartlett pool for amonth previous to this affair andspectators are going to be ti’eated tosome fine swimming.Individual StarsBill Weddell, who has done somegood swimming in former carnivals,will swim for Phi Psi. With his helptheir strong swimming aggregationwill fight it out with the others whohave entered. Dick Hough andMaury Wadley are the hope of ChiPsi and are expected to do well intheir events. Both of these menhave hung up good records in previ¬ous attempts. Bob Faris, John Grif¬fin and Joe Weelder will perform forDelta Sikma, Phi. Faris and Griffinare well known as swimmers aroundthe natatorium and Joe Wecklerplaced second last year in fancy div¬ing.Entries are being received for thenovelty events now. All swimmersin the University are eligible forthese events and although no pointswill be given for competing in themprizes will be awarded to those whomake the best showing. - Psi U s’“Come Back” In FinalPeriod To Tie D. U.Team, 12-12In the feature game of the day,D. U. and Psi U. played a sensation¬al 12 to 12 tie. D. U. started outwith a rush and with a series of pret¬ty passes took the ball fifty yards fora touchd/wn. An intercepted passfollowed by a sixty-five yard run byLobey paved the way for the secondD. U. touchdown. Schneberger car¬ried the ball over for the score.Psi U’* StrengthenPsi U. looked like a different teamin the second half and tied the score.Long runs by Libby and a nice passto Polland who starred throughoutthe game accounted for their firstscore. Lott carried the ball over totie the count.Clark’s long run for D. U. andGudon’s work for Psi U. were otheroutstanding features of the game. Itwas a rough and hard fought affair.Another TieAnother tie resulted in the othersemi-final game when Phi Sigma Del¬ta scored in the last minute of playto knot the count at six all. In thefirst half, Brill intercepted a pass andran 30 yards for the Macs’ touch¬down. Late in the second half Preisspassed to Bieles who was tagged onthe one yard line. On the next playPreiss passed to Geltspan for thescore. Darkness prevented furtherplay.The semi-finals between the D.U. and Psi U. and the Macs and PhiSigma Delta will be played on Fri¬day afternoon.NEW BADGER CAPT.Madison, Wis., Dec. 2, 1926.—Vic¬tor Chapman, Jr., residing in Madi¬son has been elected to Captain theWisconsin 1927 Cross Country team.At a recent meeting of the membersof Tom Jones’ Title Holders Chap¬man was made the leader by a unan¬imous vote. The local harrier willattempt to lead his team to theirfourth consecutive Big Ten victory.HSPECIALSHSPECIAL PLATE LUNCHEONS 50cTABLE D’HOTE DINNER 85cCRISP CREAM WAFFLESA SECOND CUP OF OUR DELICIOUS COFFEEFOR THE ASKING [THE GEM RESTAURANT(Formerly Wheel & Whistle, Inc.)THE INTERSTATE COMPANY1590 East 53rd Street(Under East End I. C. R. R. Elevation)Page hou; 9Z6I 'Z H3HW3D3a ‘AVQSanHl ‘NOOHVIM A3IVQ 3H1^ "WhistleWHY NOT?Life is short and life is earnest,Says the pessimistic muse—So perhaps our grads before us,Have term-papers we can use!MR. BABCOCK in the English de¬partments maintains that “there are5376 different ways of saying onesentence: “But why, then, do THEYstick to that one monotonous word,“Because?”OF general interest to the campusis this poignant bulletin board no¬tice:“Residents of Snell Hall as a oodyare aware of the necessity for quietin the Hall especially after seven inthe evening. Horsing around by dayor by nights is annoying to the resi¬dent body as a whole. The few resi¬dents who go in strong for boyishpranks in the prep school manner arcurged to overcome this tendency ifpossible.. In extreme and persistentcases of arrested development, theunfortunate resident will be advisedto pack up his belongings and movetwo blocks d.ue North. . ”From which it can be suspectedthat some of these notorious SnellHall cutups have been reading theirMaster’s theses aloud, or have ever,taken to midnight parchesi.Our Hearts Bleed For DevastatedOak Park!Dear Turk:Tell George M. that we’ll welcomehim with open arms to Danville. Wejust love our big guns, and since Un¬cle Joe is gone there’s a big gap inthe front line. And George gasesso nicely!—Light ArtilleryPLAINTYou said you thought me fair andcute . . .But did not ask, “What night willsuit?"You like my skin, my eyes, my hair. .And yet you did not seem to careThat these words to my heart hadgone—You said, “I love you,”And passed on!—a ReBut Who Wants to Run Out of GasNear a Gas Station?Say Turk:The day before yesterday you ex¬plained to GeuG that he should earnyour salary because your old manwanted to see about the family carspeedometer reading 1459 when dad¬dy had parked it at 1400. Gee, oldman, you certainly drive some tofind a parking space!—MinnaTHE story of Geqrge Washingtonand his “I did it with my own littlehatchet” had been deleted from theCleveland, Ohio, textbooks. Andoughtn’t they do somethingthe questionable assertionGeorge and his boys brokebeer party at Trenton? aboutthatup aAnd They Always Bum “Camels”Dear Turk:“. .. . And so we are entirely con¬vinced of the evolution of man fromlower animals. For do we not seethat man first of all still has “bare”hands; how can/ we overlook the“calves” of the fair sex; do not thefundamentalists remind us of ’’jack¬asses”; don’t the boys carry “swal¬lows” on their hips; and shouldn’twe consider the “bull” on the tips oftheir tongues?—Rudy, the Missing LinkMR. GRUTER, who pilots the Wes¬tern Union bicycle in this neighbor¬hood, tells us he still remembers the18-1 baseball game that Coach Staggpitched at Yale. Nice messenger boy!-TERRIBLE TURK TO REORGANIZEU. RIFLE CLUB CLASSIFIED(Continued from sports page)are tVee, and ammunition may be hadRussel W’iies, Sr., who has oftenhelped the club in the past, has fur¬nished two target rifles and twotelescopes. His shooting has won himmany championships in the past, andalthough he made his best recordthree years ago at the internationalmatches held at Camp Perry, he wasbeaten by one point by his own son. WANTED—Young man for tutor¬ing. 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