\.President Mas¬on returned yes¬terday from tripto California. Batlp iHaroon First Choruscall for Black-friars tonight inMandel.Vol. 26 No. 97 UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO, THURSDAY, APRIL 8, 1926 Price Five CentsMAROON WEEKWILL CONTINUEUNTILMONDAYSales 'Drive Successful;Better Than That ofFormer YearsMaroon Week, which started lastTuesday morning, will continue untilnext Monday evening at 10 o’clock.Announcement of this extension wasmade by Thomas Mulroy, businessmanager of The Daily Maroon, atthe luncheon given yesterday noon inIda Noyes hall for the women onthe Maroon Week committees. Thisextension makes the drive exactly oneweek long.Miss Burtis, general chairwoman ofthe week, reported at the luncheonyesterday that to date this year’s drivehas been more successful than thecorresponding campaign !a*t year. Ac¬curate figures are not as yet available,hut from what material she has beenable to gather the general chairwomanhas found that the drive this year isto date a success.Speak at LuncheonFrank O’Hara, director of studentactivities, Mrs.. Goodspced. iiead of IdaNoyes hall, Mulroy and Miss Burtisall spoke at the noon meeting.The four teams, led by* KatherineRose, Helen Lamborn, Betsy Farwell.and Ruth DeWitt are in close compe¬tition for high team honors. Mulroyannounced yesterday that the winningteam will be the guests of The DailyMaroon at the theatre next week.Arrange For Mixer■••'Arrangements arc beioff "\ade lorthe biggest mixer of the school yearnext Friday afterfloon. Both loungesof the Reynolds club have been re¬served by The Daily Maroon and ap¬propriate decorations in true newspa¬per style are being planned for thisaffair. Bill Hahn and his seven peiceedition of the College Crew will fur¬nish the music at the dance. Men areurged to escort partners to this big¬gest of all mixers.A table has been set up under theclock in Cobb and sales women are inattendance during all the crowded!hours of the day. This table will re¬main in its present position until theend of the drive. Sales women maybe identified by the maroon and whiteribbons.APPOINT SIX WOMENTO ATTEND Y. W.CONVENTION\Announcement has been made byKathleen Stewart, president of Y. M.C. A. of the six women who will at¬tend the National Biennial Conventionat Milwaukee, April 21 to 27. Theyare: Helen Wooding, outgoing presi¬dent of Y. W.; Kathleen Stewart,president; Allis Graham, vice presi¬dent; Marscia Wallace, chairman ofthe Industrial committee; Mrs. Wil¬liam J. Monilaw, chairman of the ad¬visory board; and Margaret LoganClark, secretary.The Biennal Y. W. C. A. conventionis one of the chief activities of theSpring quarter. Representatives fromall branches of the Y. W. C. A. willconvene at this convention and prob¬lems of business will be discussed. Atthis meeting the business of the Y.W. C. A. for the next two years willbe planned.Schedule Smoker for *Hitchcock ResidentsHitchcock hall students will holdtheir first smoker of the quarter thisevening at 7:30. Vice PresidentWoodward and Dean Harvey will bethe guests of honor and it is urgedthat all residents of the hall attend.JUNIOR COUNCIL MEETSMembers of the Junior class coun¬cil will meet today at 3:30 in Classics20. Attendance is compulsory. Zanesvil]e Pleased;Fires School Supt.Should athletics give full swayto scholarship activities? Sothought Superintendent F. C.Kirkendall, superintendent o fschools of Zanesville, Ohio, whenhe refused to let the Zanesvillebasketball team represent Ohio inthe National Interscholastic Tour¬nament held at Chicago last week.But opposition to his views wasso great that he finally yieldedand handed in his resignation.The boys came to the Univer¬sity and returned home with theConsolation title. They were un¬fortunate in meeting in he firstround the team favored to win thetournament. But their prowessand success was so great in theConsolation tournament that theschool board met in special ses¬sion after they returned home andunanimously accepted Mr. Kir-kendall’s resignation.MASON TELLSOF TRIP WEST CALL MEN FORFRIARS’ CHORUSTRYOUT TODAYAuthors Seek Music ForLyrics On ThreeNew SongsThe first chorus call for the annualBlackfriars production. “Wallie WatchOut,” was issued yesterday by Ham¬ilton Coleman, director, who an¬nounced that all men expecting to takepart in the chorus should meet thisafternoon at 3 in the Reynolds theatre.The show, according to Mr. Cole¬man, requires an unusually largechorus and offers a splendid opportun¬ity to those wishing to take part inBlackfriars. Men with new songs orspecialty acts arc invited to attendthe first chorus rehearsal Monday af¬ternoon.Paul Cullom, Abbot of Blackfriars,has just given out three new lyrics,for which music is to he written.They are “Hell s Bells for Freshmen,”“Daguerreotype Song” and “RaggedyAnn.” Those, wishing copies of thewords are advised to see Cullom atPresident Returns From SixWeeks’ VacationPresident Max Mason returned tothe University yesterday morningafter a six week pleasure trip 5nCalifornia, with plans for a biggerand better year for Chicago. Spend¬ing most of his time out-of-doorsgolfing and riding, the President en¬joyed a perfect vacation but declaresbimself glad to return to the citywhere the University is the centerof activities of every kind.Berkeley, Pasadena, San Fran¬cisco, Los Angeles, and San Diegowere among the cities on the coastwhich the President visited. At LosAngeles he found a very large andenthusiastic group of University(Continued on page 2)Y. M. C. A. HOLDSFIRST OPEN HOUSEOF SPRING QUARTERExtending an invitation to the menjust entering the University, the Y.M. C. A. announces the first Openhouse for the spring quarter. It willbe held today from 4 to 6 in the sputlilounge of the Reynolds club.The University Glee Club will singseveral numbers from their repertory.This entertainment is to take placefrom 4:30 to 5. Refrshments will heserved throughout the afternoon."We want the new men of the Uni¬versity, in particular, to come around,”said Tom Paul, president of the as¬sociation. "However, the invitation isnot confined to them. We expect allthe men of the University to come in,if only for a few minutes.”What's On Today IFederation will entertain all en¬tering women at tea today from 4to 6 in the north reception room ofIda Noyes hall.University Women’s council, 4,Cobb 115.II Circolo Italiano, 4:30, IdaNoyes.Women’s Speakers’ club, 7, IdaNoyes hall.Physics club, 4:30, Ryerson 32.“Secondary Cathode Rays,” by Dr.S. Chylinski.Graduate History club, 7:45, IdaNoyes hall. “The Burning of Colum¬bia,” by Mr. Joe Patterson Smith.Radio lecture at 9, from Mitchelltower, through station WMAQ. “An¬cient Days—Modern Ways.” hv Mrs.Edith W. Ware. once.Freshmen wishing to make the or¬der of Blackfriars by working on theprogram staff, should see WilfredHeitman in the Blackfriars office to¬day at 3.Exhibit Postersof Former FriarContests in W31Prize-winning designs in previousBlackfriar poster contests are nowon exhibit in the Law Bridge andW31 cases in Harper library to serveas guides for campus artists whoplan to participate in this year’s con¬test. Three posters for “Haiti fromHaiti” are now on the Law Bridge,while the exhibit case in W31 con¬tains posters for “Machinations ofMax,” “Anybody’s Girl,” “So LongSusan,” and “Filming of Friars.”All campus artists have been in¬vited to participate in this contest,which will close Thursday, April 15.The winning designs will be used inthe official advertising of the produc¬tion. Further information may beobtained from Paul Cullom, PhiKappa Psi house.START EXPERIMENTSIN UNCOMPLETEDLABORATORYStaff members and graduate studentshave already started scientific experi¬ments in the still unfinished WhitmanZoological Laboratory at Ingleside ave¬nue and 57th street. The money for thebuilding was given by Prof, and Mrs.Frank Lillie, and named Whitman Zoo¬logical Laboratory in commemoration ofthe first head of the department of Zo¬ology in the University. The greaterpart of the equipment of the laboratoryhas l>een furnished by Prof. Lillie, therest having been removed from the oldzoology building and the greenhouses.The facilities of the laboratory are nowbeing utilized by fourteen people of theUniversity. All the plumbing in thestructure has been worked in ^le openso that it can easily be repaired or re¬modeled to order to keep the facilitiesof the laboratory up-to-date.The equipment of the building in¬cludes a refrigerator machine, which isconnected with one large refrigeratingroom as well as two temperature humid¬ity control rooms, where the temperatureand humidity can be kept constant. Theequipment also includes a large experi¬mental dark room and a photographicalroom.SOPHOMORE COUNCIL MEETSThe Sophomore class council willmeet today at 2:30 in Cobb 205 tomake final arrangements for theFrosh-Soph prom. Whistle Club Starts on OfficialCareer by Publishing ConstitutionPALMER SECURED FORSECOND AD LECTUREMr. J. L. Palmer, instructor in theSchool of Commerce and Administration,has been secured to give the second' of aseries of talks presented in conjunctionwith the Star Frosh contest. The sub¬ject will be "The Value of Business Ex¬perience.”letters are being sent out to the chosenprospects who are considered to be themost representative freshmen on thecampus. Freshmen who are not so noti¬fied. hut who think that they fulfill thequalifications can notify “Chuck” Harris,campaign manager of the Daily Maroon.SCOn DEFINESMUSSOLINI RULEAnalyzes Conditions In ItalyTodayMussolini’s reorganization of theItalian senate is the culminatingtriumph of militant, imperialistic anddictatorial Facism, and marks theoverthrow of parliamentary govern-jment in Italy, according to Prof, jArthur P. Scott, University historian.In a radio talk from The Daily News Jstation, WMAQ, Prof. Scott analyzedthe political moves which led to theItalian dictator’s latest startling in¬novation.“Parliamentary government suchas we know it today is done for,”Mussolini said in a recent speech,which sums up the whole situationaccording to last night’s speaker.Tells of FascismFascism, violently attacked and asfanatically defended, arose from thepost-war chaos in Italy, the Univer-j sity historian said. It represented ,the middle class desire for law andorder when the government was un¬able to control the situation, andpeasants were seizing lands andworkers taking possession of fac¬tories all over Italy.Reorganizing the senate on thebasis of economic instead of geo- jgraphical representation paves thei(Continued on page 2)HOLD TEA FOR NEWDIVINITY STUDENTS;FACULTY MEMBERSNew faculty members and studentsof the Theological school will be wel¬comed to the University at a tea to hegiven in their honor today from 4 to5 in the social room of the new The¬ology building, under the auspices ofthe Students’ Theological association.According to announcement of theSocial committee of the organization,the tea is being given in an effort togive new student and faculty mem¬bers the opportunity to become ac¬quainted with veteran members of theschool. So that their aim may he ac¬complished the social committee hasurged everyone to come out to wel¬come new arrivals. This is the firstof a series of teas which will be givenevery Thursday in the Theologicalbuilding.MILITARY HOP BIDSFOR SALE TUESDAYTickets for the annual Military Ball,which will be held April 23 from 9 to 1at the South Shore Country club, willgo on sale next Tuesday at 1 in Cobb107. Non-fraternity men, non-club wom¬en and graduate students may obtaintickets to the affair from 1 to 3 any dayafter that time until the available supplyof bids is exhauseed.The fraternity allotments will be readyfor distribution at the same time, andrepersentatives of the fraternities are re¬quested to call for their allotments assoon as possible. Banquets, teas, and mixers,—these may feature Maroon Week inthe eyes of the general public, butthe Whistle feels its privilege andduty to make a unique contributionto the campus—a constitution fdrthe Whistle Club, recently recog¬nized as an official campus organiza¬tion.Terrible Turk (Leo Stone) reportson the progress of his wits with greatpride and enthusiasm. “We havehad our picture taken,” says he; “wehave had meetings; we have acceptedand rejetced sundry invitations; andnow' we reach the ultimate in organ¬ization—by-laws, and things likethat.” The constitution was ratifiedat a recent meeting.Constitution of the Whistle Club.Article I. Description.A. The name of this organizationshall be the Whistle Club, a localorganization of the University ofChicago, affiliated with the staff ofThe Daily Maroon. B. The emblemof the Whistle Club shall be a whis¬tle, to be individually purchased bymembers. C. The financial obliga¬tions will be assessments, agreed toby the body, to be levied for cover¬ing current expenses, such as costsof various functions, entertaining,etc.Article II. Purpose.A. To advise The Daily Maroon(Continued on page 4)“Big Time”BoysStar in Phoenix‘Celebrity’ Issue“Celebrities” is the name of theApril number of the Phoenix whichis to appear on the campus a weekfrom today.To bear out the title, Handschyand his staff have collected togethersome “hot stuff” from the most cele¬brated of contributors to humorousmagazines. McClelland Barclay, art¬ist for “College Humor” and forFisher bodies, has draw'n the cover.The identity of the girl on the coveris still a great mystery and from alladvance information it is going toremain so until next Thursday morn¬ing.Ellis Parker Butler, author ot“Pigs is Pigs,” “The Great AmericanPie Company,” et cetera, is one ofthe leading contributors; RobertSherwood, author of “Life” is an¬other; John Held, Jr., noted artist;Helen Hokinson, artist for “VanityFair”; and Stephen Leacock, of Mc¬Gill University are other importantcontributors. With these and ourown campus artists and w'ielders ofthe pen, the April Phoenix ought tobe celebrated.JUDGE MARKS TALKSON SYNAGOGUE ATMEETINGJudge Robert Marks, a parner in thelaw firm of Aaron Sapiro, will discuss"What’s Wrong with the Synagogue,”at the meeting of the Jewish Students’organization today at 4:30 in Qassics 10.Judge Marks, formerly of Ohio, is nowpermanently located in Chicago and oc¬cupies a leading position at the bar here.The remainder of the meeting will bedevoted to organizing the club and elect¬ing officers. The organization committeewill report on the work done during thepast quarter and will also make itsrecommendation for a new and perma¬nent name for the association.The nominating committee, composedof Leo Stone, chairman, Harry May,Paul Leffman, Edna Wilhartz andRhoda Loewenberg, will present thenames of the candidates for the cluboffices. The nominees are as follows:President, Leon Despres; secretary,Jeanette Rubin; treasurer, IrvingPflaum; members-at-large, LawrenceNewmark, Paul Leffman and VioletPritzker. FROSH-SOPH HOPTICKETS NEARLYGONE, SAYS HEAD% ■—Predict Sale of EntireQuota by ThisAfternoonThree hundred couples, with not morethan one upperclassman in each pair, willattend the annual Freshman-SophomoreProm tomorrow evening from 9 to 1at the Chicago Beach hotel. Ticket salesto date have warranted the prediction ofPaul Ivewis, president of the Sophomoreclass, that the quota of tickets will besold by this afternoon.The chief officers of the Sophomoreand Freshman classes will lead the prom.Paul Lewis, president of the Sophomoreclass, and Helen King, vice president,will lead one wing, and George Poole,president of the Freshman class, andJanet Goode, vice president, will leadthe other. These four officers are incharge of the arrangements for the an¬nual dance.O’Hare To Furnish MusicHusk O’Hare and his thirteen pieceCasino Club orchestra has been engagedto furnish the music for the affair. TheO’Hare brand of music will be remem¬bered from the Score club dance andSettlement Night.Tickets have been allotted to the fra¬ternities and sell for $2.50 per couple.Non-fraternity men, and graduate stu¬dents may obtain bids from any of thefour leaders.The Daily Maroon is issuing a specialnumber, as it did at the WashingtonProm, to serve as a program. This edi¬tion will be passed out as the couplesenter the ball room.Dance To Be FormalEvening clothes will be worn, as istraditional at this affair. The leadershave promised that the ball room willbe decorated in a lavish manner and thatdifferent colored lights will be used foreffect.There will be no guests of honor atthe affair, and University men are re¬quested to escort campus women. Aswas announced in yesterday’s issue ofThe Daily Maroon the leaders are not infavor of stage celebrities or celebrities-to-be as partners for campus men at¬tending the Prom. These it will be re¬membered were features of the Wash¬ington Prom. It is hoped that the affairwill In: an exclusively campus dance.As it is a Freshman-Sophomore affair,it is expected that these classes will berepresented in every couple, said HelenKing, vice president of the Sophomoreclass and one of the Prom leaders.No supper will !>e served, according toLewis, who declared that it is not tra¬ditional to serve supper at junior collegedances. The patrons and patronesseswill l>e announced in tomorrow’s issue ofThe Daily Maroon.Ask Ticket ReturnsTh« Prom leaders are especiallyanxious to hear from the fraternitieswho have not as yet made returns ontheir ticket allotments.- It is necessarythat unsold tickets be reurned as soonas possible in order that they may beresold, as it is expected that the sup¬ply which the Prom leaders now haveon hand will fall far short in meet¬ing the demand today and tomorrow.GIVE CONGREGATIONALCLUB MASQUE PARTYAs an opening social event of the quar¬ter, members of the Congregational clubhave planned a masquerade party to beheld tonight at 8 in the Seminary, at1165 E. 58th street. Congregational stu¬dents and faculty members have beeninvited to attend this affair in costume.“It is hoped that by having an infor¬mal party of this sort at the beginningof the quarter, new members will becomeacquainted with old ones at the offset,”said Albert A. Walker, president of theorganization. “We hope that a largenumher will take advantage of this op¬portunity to attend a get-together party.”Page Two THE DAILY MAROON, THURSDAY, APRIL 8, 1926<E1jp lath; ittarmntFOUNDED IN 1901THE OFFICIAL STUDENT NEWSPAPER OP THE UNIVERSITT OP CH1CAOOPublished mornings, except Saturday, Sunday and Monday, during the Autumn.Winter and Spring quarters by The Dally ilaroon Company. Subscription rates:13.00 per year; by mail, $1.00 per year extra. Single copies, Ore cents each.Entered a? second-class mall at the Chicago Postotflce, Chicago, Illinois, March 13,1906. under the act of March 3, 1873.The Dally Maroon expressly reserves all rights of publication of any materialappearing in this psperOFFICE—ROOM ONE, ELLIS HALL5804 Ellis AvenueTelephones: Editorial Office, Midway 0800, Local 245; Business Office,Fairfax 0977. Sports Office, Local 80, 2 RingsThe Daily Maroon solicits the expression of student opinion In Its columns on allsubjects of student Interest Contributors must sign their full names to communica¬tions. but publication will, upon request, be anonymous.Member of the Western Conference Press AssociationThe StaffAllen Heald, EditorMilton Kauffman, Managing EditorThomas R. Mulroy, Business ManagerEDITORIAL DEPARTMENTGertrude Rromberg Women's EditorHarry L. Sblaes Sports EditorReese Price News EditorWalter Williamson News EditorLeo Stone Whistle EditorMarjorie Cooper, Assistant Women's EditorRuth Daniels .. Assistant Women’s EditorAlta Gundy Social Editor BUSINESS DEPARTMENTEthan Granquist Office DirectorLeland Neff Advertising DirectorMilton Kreines Local Adv. ManagerThomas Field Copy ManagerFrederick Kretschmer, Circulation ManagerGeorge Gruskin Classified ManagerJack Pincus Auditor SCOTT DEFINESMUSSOLINI RULETHE WORLD OR NOT THE WORLD?/COLLEGE is made of two ingredients. One tends to link it withthe outside world; the other tends to isolate it.First, there are the unworldly parts of college, the things thatseparate it from bank and factory. We do, say, think, read, andwear things that no business man would understand. We ourselvescan not understand them five years hence. We try to be a raceapart. We take care that our clothes shall differ a little from thelawyer’s or the shoe salesman’s. We often live in quarters moreluxurious than our lodgings will be five years hence. We studycourses in the grammar, the technique, the mechanics of living, ratherthan in living itself. We concern ourselves about football, classelections, plays, and publications that may imitate the outer world,but try primarily to make college a world by itself. We live herenot the life to which we were born, nor the life to which we shallgraduate. We relish this difference. We are a chosen band becausewe insist on being one.Then, there are parts of college life that join it to the rest of theworld. College seeks means of preparing us for life, and sometimeshits upon the idea of teaching us what life is. So we have coursesin the social sciences, courses in the literatures that record othermen’s hopes and fears, courses that teach us to speculate. We meet,at alumni reunions, those who have lived in the great world, besidesgoing to college in our little world. Our braver comrades sometimeswork in steel mills, or travel on cattle-boats. The loaning-officerand the publicity-writer seldom have such adventures. They arereserved for us in college, and make us a part of the world.Both these factors serve their purpose in our training. We can notcall one artificial and the other real. Both are real to us. Oneteaches us what life is, and so teaches us to live. The other imitateslife—plays at living—and it too (at least sometimes) teaches us tolive. Men who climb high in Activities often climb high in Business—though some of them go broke. The insular parts of college aresometimes meaningless; but often they have a close connection withreality.The unlucky thing is that they have not always that connection.Could we not sift the worthwhile from the worthless? Could wenot check over some of our activities, and our habits, and keep onlythose that have real experience in them? A reasonable amount ofplay will keep Jack College from being a dull boy; but too muchplay, or play taken too seriously, will never make him a man.“Star Frosh” Contest(Entry Blank)Charles J. HarrisThe Daily Maroon1 hereby make application for the “Star Frosh” Con¬test of The Daily Maroon.NameAddressNote:. Send thi8 in immediately and you will be noti¬fied within a few days whether or not you will be accepted.C. ANDREWS G. KONELLMORE**CHICAGO'S FINEST RESTAURANTCatering to a Discriminating Patronage Who Desirethe Best of Food and Service at ModeratePrices6344-46 Cottage Grove AvenueHyde Park 7373 ’ CHICAGO (Continued from page 1)way for abolishing the lower houseof the Italian parliament, and marksMussolini’s consolidation of power.Defends Italy“We must realize that our parti¬cular form of constitutional govern¬ment may not be the most satisfac¬tory for other nations,” warned Prof.Scott. Italy which has known hardlymore than two generations of parlia¬mentary rule, is not deeply welded torepresentative government. The par¬tisan nature of the arguments forand against the Fascist dictatorshipmake it difficult to determine whetherthis sort of leadership is proving suc¬cessful.The reorganization of the senate.Prof. Scott said, leaves Mussolini infull control of the state, with an ad¬visory body composed of representa¬tives from various industries. It isthe latest of a series of moves lead¬ing to complete dictatorship. Earlierinnovations were the election lawwhich gave a two-thirds representa¬tion in parliament to the party whichobtained a majority at the polls, anact making the premier responsibleto the king and not to the parliament,the abolition of local self govern¬ment, and the new power of thepremier to make laws by decree.With the Movie-GoerClara Bow, of screen flapper fame,is one of the stars in “DancingMothers” at tne Tivoli this week. Thephotoplay is the amplified version ofthe stage success which until a fewweeks ago was being given at a looptheatre. MASON TELLS OF TRIPWEST(Continued from page 1)alumni. The Chamber of Commerceof that city entertained Pres. Masonat a dinner which all of the presi¬dents of the universities in the vicin¬ity of Los Angeles attended. Pres.Ernest M. Hopkins of Dartmouth andPres. Mason gave short talks.Dr. George E. Hale, formerly di¬rector of Yerkes Observatory, andDr. Robert A. Milliken, both recentmembers of the faculty of the Uni¬versity are leaders in research workon the coast with whom the presidentrenewed his acquaintance.LEARN TO DANCE WELLTAKE A FEW LESSONS NOWTeresa Dolan Dancing School1208 East 63rd Street, near WoodlawnClasses Nightly at 8:00 and Sundays 2:00to 6:00. Charleston, Saturday. Privatelessons any time, day or evening.PHONE HYDE PARK 3080 50c WAVESevery day except SaturdayLicensed OperatorsKENNEDY SHOPS1155 E. 63rd St. 6351 Cottage Grove Ave.Midway 0207 Fairfax 58961455 E. 63rd St. 5226 Harper Ave.Dorchester 3755 Hyde Park 2408| ^Jhe largest sellingquality pencilthe worldSuperlative in quality,the world-famous\7ENUSV PENCILSgive best service andlongest wear.Plain ends, per doz. $1.00Rubber ends, per doz. 1.20c4t all dealer*American Lead Pencil Co.220 Fifth Ave., N. Y. Milk For DrivingPowerBefore beginning active work or play thattakes an unusual amount of driving energy,drink a glass or two of WANZER’S MILK.It is stimulating and rich in nourishment, anda delicious beverage for any time of the day.YOU CAN DEPEND ONSIDNEY WANZER & SONSTELEPHONE CALUMET 0817WANZER’SPURE DAIRY PRODUCTSP. A. throwspipe-peevesfor a lossAND the bigger they are, the harder they fall,as Shakespeare or somebody said. You canprove this beyond question with a jimmy-pipeand a tidy red tin of Prince Albert. Any time.Anywhere. As a matter of fact, tackling pipe-grouches is P. A.’s regular business.Cool and sweet and fragrant, P. A.’s wonder¬ful smoke comes curling up the pipe-stem,filling your system with a new brand of pipe-pleasure. You smoke—and smile! For the firsttime in your life, you’ve found the one tobaccothat scales to your blueprint of bliss.Slow or fast, no matter how you feed it, P. A.never bites your tongue or parches your throat.Those important items were taken care of inthe original plans by the Prince Albert process.Get yourself a tidy red tin of this friendly tobaccotoday.Fringe albert—no other tobacco is like it! verywhertidy red tins, bound end half,pound (in humidor j, andpound crystal-glass humidortwith sponge-moistener top.And always with every bit ofbite and perch remoyej bythe Prince Albert proettt.S1926.R. J. ReynoldiTobaccompany, Winston-Salem, N. C.The Maroon for Three Months One Dollar—V<*•,c• **i- ►’ Entries pour in forCook County PrepSwim Meet. The Daily SPO RTS Maroon —- ■■. -.-i —I-M Department an¬nounces personnel forspring quarter.Thursday Morning or u ■A 1 O April 8, 1926PREP SWIM MEET TO BE GREATESTIntra-Mural Heads Announce Plans For Entire Quarter COOK COUNTY HIGHSCHOOLS TO SENDSWIM TEAMS HERENOMINATE HOWEAS MANAGER OFSPRING PROGRAMArnold Johnson Is NamedAssistant; AppointNew StaffJohn Howe will be manager of thespring athletic program arranged bythe Intramural department, it wasannounced yesterday. He will beassisted by Arnold Johnson. Theywill manage the big Spring Festival,the tennis and playground ball sched¬ules with aid from a new staff. Itis the policy of the Intramural de¬partment to have complete staffs foreach of the fall, winter and springquarters.Very SuccessfulThus far, the staffs have succeededin turning in the best results everattained in the history of the depart¬ment, there being unusually smallconfusion during the fall and wintercampaigns. Through efficient man¬agement the Intramural system hopesto further its end of “Athletics forAll” the slogan it had adopted. Thepersonnel for the spring quarter isas follows:Playground ball: Carl Erickson,Lalon Farwell, co-managers. Wil¬liam O’Malley, office assistant; HarryAult, Harry Hagey, McCormack, fieldassistants.Spring Festival: Bill Weddell,manager; Gordon Wallace, assistantmanager.Tennis: Gordon Stillson, manuger;Bruehaus, Herbert, assistants.Bublicity: Bill Weddell.Office assistant*: Bell, Treben,Mueller, Koecher, Widmann.IOWA NINE TRAVELSSOUTH FOR PRACTICEIowa City, Iowa, April 7.—Coach OttoVogel and his baseball squad slipped outof town Thursday for a retreat fromthe mid-winter blizzard. The first gameagainst St. Louis University was can¬celled because of had weather and theHawkeycs continued south to a warmerzone in Mississippi.Vogel has eight men of experience leftfrom last year’s team, Capt. Flinn, Mc-Nabb, Sahs and Beardsley, outfielders;Hoben, first baseman; Smith, third base-man; Miller, catcher, and Adams, pitcher.The biggest losses by graduation wereScantlebury, shortstop, and Miller,pitcher, the two best hall players of lastyear’s team.Smith has lieen moved from third baseto shortstop to fill Scantlebury’s shoesand McNabh has been pulled in from theoutfield to play third base. Hoben is afixture at first, but second base is stillopen for the best of a flock of new men.PLAY OFF HANDBALLFINALS NEXT WEEK I-M Officials AskFor “Ball” UmpiresWith the coming of spring, ifit ever does come, intramuralbaseball will start. Already Wood-lawn and University Avenues areblocked -by fraternity men outlimbering up with bat and ball andas soon as the snow clears awaythings will get going in the usualspring manner. The I. M. officehas its schedule almost completedand soon the announcements willbe on the way to the varioushouses.But again the old problem ofumpires presents itself to the offi¬cials. So they ask that any men,who are interested in umpiringthese games, leave their name andphone number with Bill King atthe Alpha Sigma Phi house at5635 University Avenue. Thetelephone number is Dorchester1357.Experience Is not a requirementbut the men must of course be upon the latest rules for play. Lastyear’s men are especially urgedto turn in their names. Local TrackmenPrime for ThreeNational RelaysDIAMOND SQUADDRILLS IN GYMHave Advantage of OrientTrip of Last FallHandball will make its exit from theannals of winter sports next weey whenthe finals of the Intramural tournamentwill be held. Lambda Chi Alpha, AlphaDelta Phi, Tau Sigma Oinicron, and PhiKappa Sikma will meet in the cham¬pionship games.The games will be held in the Stadiumcourts. They will he the last wintersporting events. Although the matcheshave failed to attract outside interest,the players themselves are hugely en¬grossed in them. Undaunted by the miserable weatherthat has confronted them for the lasttwo weeks, the best Maroon diamondsquad since the war is working outdaily in Bartlett Gym, under thewatchful gaze of Coach Xorgren. I li¬able to make a Southern trip as manyother Big Ten schools do the Maroonnine has the advantage of the trip tothe Orient. As soon as the groundpermits, the team will work outdoorsto prepare for the opening game withPurdue at Lafayette on April 20.Have Title HopesThe hopes for the title are even bet¬ter than last year, when the Midway-ites lost the hunting by one run. Only('apt. Red Cunningham, Bill Weiss,and John and Bob Howell will bemissing from last year’s team. Fight¬ing for the berth left vacant by Cun¬ningham, will be Roy Price, a beauti¬ful fielding first baseman but slight¬ing weak on hitting, and John Mc¬Donough, the cage star. At the key¬stone sack, where Bob Howell per¬formed so capably for the last threeyears, will find keen competition withChuck Hoeger being given the edgeunless some of the new comers showunexpected form.McConnell At ShortThe veteran McConnell will work atshort with the hard hitting ClaudeBrignal! at the third sack. WallieMarks and Joe Gubbins. two of thebest pitchers in the Big Ten are back,and will be given assistance by Mack-lind who also works in the outfield.Webster, who handled the backstop¬ping last year will also do the catch¬ing again, assisted by Benton.Outfield StrongNorgren has some fleet and experi¬enced outfielders although he will missthe spectacular 'atches of John How¬ell and Weiss. Russell Pierce, BillMacklind, and Wallie Marks form adependable trio. From last vsar’s froshNorgren will have George Lott, pitch¬er; Zimmerman, outfielder; Gordon,a flashy short stop; and Kyle Ander¬son. Chicago's athletic fame will bebroadcast far and wide this springwhen her track men enter the na¬tion's relay meets. Coach Stagg isagain following his time tried policyof sending as many men as possible tothe big affairs to give them the fullestopportunities to try out against theirforemost national competitors andstrive for premier track honors.On April seventeenth a large teamof men will be sent to Columbus tocarry the maroon colors into action inthe Ohio State Relay Carnival. Thepresnt plans are to send two relayteams, one for the mile event and onefor the half-mile and one or two of theindividual performers. This is for themost part due to the adverse weatherconditions which have been keepingthe men indoors for their practise.Then on the twenty-fourth, the team\\ ill be split so that the Universitymay be represented at the two majoraffairs which arc to take place onthat day. One half will go to DesMoines to compete in the Drake Re¬lays.I he rest are to journey to Philadel¬phia to for the Penn Relays, whichhave not been missed by Chicagoteams for the past twenty-six years,rhe University was the first westernteam to take part in the affair and hasbeen one of the biggest factors inmaking it a national event. Also Chi¬cago has won seven Penn Relays,more than any other team, with theexception of course of Pennsylvania it¬self. FITCHBURG TEAMWELCOMED HOMEBY TOWNSMENArrive in “‘Blaze of Glory’As Friends ProclaimCongratulationsTHE GRID SITUATIONAT THE MIDWAY; ISIT AS BAD AS THIS?“The football situation at Chicago nextfall will test the ability of the ‘Old Man',”is the gist of one of the leading articlesof the last issue of the Big Ten Weekly.The article which is in the nature of aforecast is titled, “Gloom on the Mid¬way.”Then carrying this idea further themagazine writer, Albon Holden, says,“Perhaps not in recent years in Confer¬ence history has any coach been forcedto start to build so completely from theground up, excepting at Illinois in 1922when Bob Zuppke had only three “I”men to start the season, and those' threewere practically substitutes from theprevious season.”It says in regard to Duval, “The deckis set for Duval to make a name forhimself at quarterback. This kid canthrow passes, lutt he had no chance lastyear. He was sent in a few' times indeep mud in desperation during the finalquarter and tried a few' from standingpunt formation when everybody in thestands knew what he was ‘in there’ forThe opposing teams knew it best of all,and lacked up accordingly.” By Bob SternFitchburg, the team that won the titleof National Basketball champs at theInter scholastics last week, arrived intheir home town in a blaze of glory lastnight. The little Massachusetts townthat sent the winning team here has beenin a frenzy of excitement ever since lastSaturday evening when the news wentout over the wires that its team hadcome through with a clean win for thepremier lasket honors of the nation.M lien the hoys came home Monday theexcitement became uncontrollable, ac¬cording to reports, and ran over in onehuge outburst of enthusiasm.Meets TeamThe entire population of the town, fif¬teen thousand strong, turned out and metthe victorious athletes at tl\e train. Withtriumphant pride swelling high, theygave the lads a rnoster ovation and sweptthem up into a parade which soon grewto lie three miles in length with theschool children in the lead. They tookthe boys lack to their old school andstaged a demonstration that was trulyremarkable. Citizen after citizen roseand praised the returned heroes in themost glowing terms at their disposaland then in the midst of continuous cheersCaptain Myllykangas and his coachbrokenly expressed their appreciation ofall that the town folk had done for them,for the expenses for the trip had beendefrayed by popular subscription. Thenthe team was preesnted with a large lov¬ing cup by the citizens.First VictoryAll this because Fitchburg for the firsttime in the history of the Interscholastichad carried the national championshipto the East. And no one can say thatthey had not deserved it, for in additionto coming to paly in the basket tourney,they have twice traveled west to meetProviso High of Maywood in intersec¬tional football games. So Fitchburgfeels that it has a just right to lie proudof its team. Trophy Offered toWolverine GriddersMichigan alumni of Chicagohave again donated a large lifesize silver football trophy to beawarded to the candidate whoshows the most development inthe spring football training seasonwhich will begin April 20.According to a plan arrangedby the donor, the trophy will beawarded on a 100 per cent perfec¬tion basis judged on four stand¬ards. First, attendance, 25 percent being awarded for perfectattendance at every meeting ofthe squad; second, improvementduring the spring season, 25 percent; third, value as a Varsitycandidate, 40 per cent; fourth at¬titude displayed toward the workarranged for the spring program,10 per cent. ^Last spring a similar trophywas awarded to Ray Baer, ofLouisville.PLAN FOR STAGGPREP TRACKMEETSend Out AnnouncementsTo Various SchoolsNow that the Eighth National Bas¬ketball Interscholastic is over work isbeing started to make preparations forthe National track meet of the samesort—the Sagg Interscholastic. Thisbig event is a forcrunnr of the bas¬ketball meet, having been started sev¬eral years before the latter sport be¬came of nation-wide popularity.Instead of waiting until each stateholds its championship meet, and theninviting the winner and runner up ofeach state as is done for the basket¬ball Interscholastic, invitations are(Continued on page 4)• ERNST-RCfflJV•5<309 • HARPER-OVE'• PHONE- = HyDE-PflREV6262■•ARM‘PHOTOGRAPHER REALDANCEMUSICTelephoneHarrison 0103THE BEST FIRST MORTGAGEREAL ESTATE BONDSIN CHICAGOSEE US, WE SELL ON THEPARTIAL PAYMENT PLAN$100.00 Bond$10.00 Starts You On aBaer Eisendrath & Co.208 S. LaSalle StreetWabash 0208Campus Representatives:Jo*. L. Eisendrath, Jr.Simon Lesser How DidYour GartersLookThis Morning?3EORSEFROST COMPANYMAKERSBOSTON No MoreSkidding Garters!AGRIPPA - WEB makes garters act in anentirely new way—and only in Bostons canthis web be had. Even when worn very looseit will not slip. It cannoc curl and yet it isremarkably soft and light. Here in fact is apractical, comfortable, ventilated-web garter.In many pleasing colors, 50c the pair. Many Local Prep StarsTo Compete InBig MeetThe Eighth Interscholastic affordedcampus students a chance to see thefleetest floor-game performers of thecountry in action. Swim fans areclamoring for an opportunity to viewbudding fin-strokers in their moistenvironment: ’tis with this reason inmind that Coach Mac Gillivray hasinvited nearby teams to participate inthe coming splash meets that are tobe held in the Bartlett Natatorium.Whilst the Basketball tourney drewteams from coast to coast, the greaterpart of the swim entries are of urbanglory, all the swimmers having com¬peted in meets in Chicago or its “en¬virons.”Entry blanks have been pouringrapidly into the hands of Harry Rit-tenhouse and Eddy Fellinger whohave charge of the managing end ofthe contest. Both of these Maroonstars have high hopes for the turn outof swimmers this Friday and Saturdaynites, and expect to see many flashylocal geniuses struggle for individualand team honors.Peterson To StarDick Peterson, mighty breastrokerfrom Lindblom High, is expected tocarry away all honors in his event. Heholds a never ending string of records,and having outdistanced Eddy Len¬nox. former national high school cham¬pion, should finish in the lead withease. K. Mygdal, a youngster at1 Sliurtz, and by the way a brother ofour star breastroker, has followed hisbrother's footsteps and is turning cutsome fast time in the frog-kick strug¬gles.L. Kolbath, far famed former offancy forms is to grace the springboard event. Kolbath is a nationalknown diver, bqing considered oneof the best in High School circles.(Continued on page 4)Come on down toTHE DRAKEHOTEL GRILLEvery effort is being madeto keep the Drake Grill themost exclusive dancingplace in the city — appeal-nig only to the discriminat¬ing. .FORMAL PARTIES EVERYSATURDAY EVENINGInformal Dancing Other Even¬ings (except Sunday) 10 till 2TOMMY THATCHERand his Orchestra(A Benson Organization)GLADYS ANDES, Hostess.Subscribe Now to the Maroon—3 Months for $1Page Four THE DAILY MAROON, THURSDAY, APRIL 8, 1926S//L> vA WhistleTHE CAMPUS(Apologies to Vachel Lindsay)Collegiate men in a chapter houseroomKnown campus kings with feet un¬stableSagged and reled and fell under thetableFell under the tableBroke an empty barrel on the ceilingof the roomSoon as they were ableBoom, boom, BOOM.Hurling lurid curses at the ceilingof the roomBoomlay, boomlay, boomlay, BOOM.THEN I had religion. THEN I had avision.I could not turn from their revel inderision.THEN I saw pink serpents, crawlingon their backs,Cutting cross the Campus, leavinglurid tracks.Ooh, ooh, OOOH!!—Narcissus Willet, candidates for scholar’s de¬grees were chosen to meet in a com¬petitive examination. Those wholost out, we are told, were given thehonorary distinction of writing“Failed” after their names. Damnedconsiderate, these Chinese!The Prof. Can Sling-shot Him WithThose GallusesDear Turk:Prof. T. V. Smith who thinks anindividual can control his conducthad better take a pair of brassknuckles and a club with him whenhe debates Clarence Darrow nextSunday because Clarence avows anindividual cannot control his con¬duct, and naturally intends to proveit. —KenH. L. MENCKEN has been put injail. Another argument againstparole laws.THE Alpha Delts are bringingtheir alumni together Saturday nightto witness a dramatic performanceput on by the active chapter talent.Obviously,' they don’t want a newhouse.SONG OF THE DYING MAIDEN(Apologies to Napier Wilt)There’s a little rose-wood casket,Sitting on a marble shelf—And it holds the true love lettersWritten by my dear love’s self.Go, and bring them to me, brother—For I must leave you soon—And call the Her-Examiner,The Post, and the Tribune.TRIUMPH OF MIND OVERMATTER(Apologies to Lee Neff)_ A manStanding in front ofHis mirrorTalking himselfOut of a shave.IN ancient China, explains Prof.Are You QoingInto the BondBusiness?There is a cycle of fashionnot only for the hats col¬lege men wear but for theline of work into whichthey go.But your job has to fityour head as well as yourhat, for it has to fit yourstate of mind.Like your hat also, yourjob needs to fit your purse.Therefore, why not chooseone that brings not onlysatisfaction in service butin financial return.Selling life insurance is oneof the few modern busi¬nesses that does just this.It takes:Intelligence, Zestand AbilityIt gives:Liberty of action, thephilosophic satisfaction ofselling fijture security andpresent serenity to livingpeople, and a response, im¬mediate and tangible, inmonetary as well as mentalreward.Complete and confidential in¬formation, withoutany obligationon your part, can be obtained bywriting to the Inquiry Bureau,John Hancock Mutual LifeInsurance Company, 197Clarendon Street, Boston,Massachusetts.Life Insurance Compaop Boston. MassachusettsA SmoNG Company, Over Stxty Year*in Business. Liberal as to Contract,Safe and Secure in Every Way. THE WHISTLERS CONSTITU¬TION is printed in today’s Maroon.It brings out all of the contributor’sWhistle writes.—TERRIBLE TURKCOOK COUNTY HIGHSCHOOLS TO SENDSWIM TEAMS HERE teams and individual event men are se¬cured for the Stagg meet.In view of this fact, official an¬nouncements have been sent to prom¬inent high schools of the country, es¬pecially those that competed in lastyear’s meet. A copy of the programfor tins year’s Basketball Interscholas¬tic is sent with these announcements,which call attention to the fact that ashort resume of the Stagg lnterschol-astic of last year is contained on pagethirty-five of the program.ALPHA DELTS TOPRESENT DRAMATICBILL FOR ALUMNI(Continued front page 3)Edwards of Senn will furnish Kol-bath most of the competition, beingalso noted for his aptness* in the non¬splash event.Carter To Make Fast TimeCarter of Lindblont is known as 011cof the fastest sprint men in the cityand will in all probability cop the laur¬els in the forty and century events.E. Knox of Englewood will also hitthe turbulent waters of the campusswimming hole, in hopes of copingwith the fast Lindblom High entry.Among the participants in the hack-stroke fray are Webster of MainTownship and Stevens of Hyde Park.Both men are exceedingly fast in theturtle event and when these two de¬mons clash—spectators are warned towear rain coats. Alpha Delta Phi will entertain Pres¬ident Max Mason. Vice-President andMrs. Frederick C. Woodward, Mr.Harold Swift, Chairman of the Boardof Trustees, and their alumni with adramatic program Saturday evening,at eight-thirty, in the Reynolds ClubTheatre.Gene Francis and Clarence Fox willperform in the first play. “Brothers,”by Lewis Beach. Francis, after threeyears on the gridiron, is making hisfirst appearance behind the footlightsin the character of a hard-boiled hack-woodsman.Prof. James Weber Linn will enter¬tain the audience before and betweenthe two presentations. Prof. Percy Holmes Boynton and Bertram G. Nel¬son, by their assistance have made itpossible for the actors to approachdramatic genius.This is the first time that a fratern¬ity at the University has undertakento present drama. The Alpha Delts,who received the idea from their chap¬ter at Yale, plan to make it an annualaffair.WHISTLE CLUB STARTSON OFFICIAL CAREER The remaining four Articles ofthe Whistle Club’s constitution willbe printed in tomorrow’s issue ofThe Daily Maroon. ESOTERIC PLEDGESEsoteric announces the pledgingof Rosemary Notter of Chicago.(Continued from page 1)as to succeeding Whistle editors. B.To develop and train candidates foreditorship. C. To promote the writ¬ing of good local humor, and at re¬gular club functions to enjoy thework done in that line by the differ¬ent members.Want AdsPLAN FOR STAGGPREP TRACKMEET(Continued from page 3)mailed uot to those teams having no¬table individual performers in any ofthe score of more of track and fieldevents. Teams having enviable recordsfor the year are included in the invita¬tions. In this way the nation’s best LOST—Two weeks before vaca- jtion a gold link bracelet. Reward, fReturn to Lost and Found, c'o Daily!Maroon.PRIVATE INSTRUCTION by agraduate student in arithmetic, geom¬etry, and algebra, by Paul Haber,5704 Kenwood Ave. Fairfax 2665.TO RENT—Bed room alone orwith living room and porch; two infamily; one, two, or three persons.Very* reasonable; 917 East 56th St.,Dorchester 2590; call after 6 p. m.TO RENT—Large, sunny, attract¬ive new furniture; overlooking cam¬pus; bath; reasonable; 911 E. 67thSt., 2nd floor. Phone Hyde Park 7510.ROOM FOR RENT—Very attract¬ive, bed, sitting room; overlookingMidway; opposite Classics Building;F. D. Coop, 1007 E. 60th St., PhoneDorchester 7941.uluuuNiiiHiMMiiHmtiranmuMuimaunufliuliiuliHuuiimuiMiiwiuiiiiuiiiiiiiiiiiimiiiinmmiu*Kenwood Club Tea Rooms1363 EAST 47th STREETKenwood Club BuildingLUNCHEON 50 CENTS DINNER 75 CENTSSpecial Sunday Dinners $1.00Special Holiday Dinners $1.50Served from 12 to 8 P. M.See Us About Our Special Inducement for Student PartiesBRIDGE-LUNCHEONS DINNER-DANCES.BANQUETS BAZAARSiimnmmmmsNEWCome in and Treat Yourselfto aDelicious French Cream WaffleWe Specialize in Mid-Night LunchesEUROPEAN and AMERICAN COOKING1590 Blast 53rd StreetEast End of I. C. Elevation THE FROLIC THEATREDRUG STOREAdjacent to Frolic TheatreCigarettes Fountain ServiceTel. H. Park 0761Corner Ellis Avenre and 55th St.J. H. FINNEGANDRUGGISTWood lawn Ave. at 55th St.CIGARS. CIGARETTES andCANDYSTATIONARY AND FOUN¬TAIN PENSPhone Midway 0708Ask for Goldenrod Ice Cream A littlemoney^ takesyou overEQUIP your summer bankroll with a pair ofsea-legs and follow it aboard a “CunardCollege Special!”What if your bankroll is thin and anaemic?A little money will now stretch all the wayacross the Atlantic and back again.A fine triumvirate:—Cunard ships—collegemen and women—low cost!$170 to $190Round TripTOURIST III CABINMISS ELIZABETH LA MAYBeecher Hall — University of ChicagoRepresentativeCUNARD & ANCHOR LINES140 N. Dearborn StM Chicagoor Local AgentThe Ox WomanOn an East Indian farm, where the crop is tea, awooden plow turns up the rich black soil. Awoman drives, another woman pulls—and a blackox pulls beside her.Six hours under a tropical sun, a bowl of cold rice—and six hours more. Then the woman goes to herbed of rushes, and the beast to his mud stall.Tomorrow will be the same.The electric light, the elec¬tric iron, the vacuum cleaner—the use of electricity onthe farm for pumping water,for milking, and for thecream separator—are help¬ing to make life happier.General Electric researchand engineering have aidedin making these conveni¬ences possible. The American home has many conveniences. Butmany American women often work as hard as theirOriental sisters. They toil at the washtub, theycarry water, they chum by hand—all tasks whichelectricity can do for them at small cost, in halfthe time.A new series of G-E adver¬tisements showing whatelectricity is doing in manyfields will be sent on request.Ask for booklet GEK-18. The labor-saving possibilities of electricity areconstantly becoming more widely recognized. Andthe sbeial significance of the release of the Americanwoman from physical drudgery, through the increas¬ing use of electricity in and about the home, willappeal instantly to every college man and woman.GENERAL ELECTRICOINERU ELECTRIC COMPANY SCHENECTADY NEW YORKOne Buck to a Pretty Girl — 3 Months9 Subscription to the MaroonB8HI ~.• \Supplement toThe Daily MaroonUNIVERSITY^ CHICAGO, THURSDAY, APRIL 8, 1926WHAT ITS ABOUTPrhaps we had better explain, firstof all, what this is intended to be.It is not a magazine. You havenoticed that already, no doubt. Whatyou have before you is no discipleof Scribner, Knopf, or Conde-Nast;much less does it set itself up asSomething New. Glance up at thetitle: “Supplement to The DailyMaroon.” That, reader, is what youare reading.The Daily Maroon is a publicationof great caprice and irregularity. Itis entertaining and dull, solemn andflippant, intelligent and meaningless,good and bad, by turns. It avoidsformality; it does not know how toremain stationary. When its editorshave an idea, they do not presumeto decide whether the idea be goodor bad. They try it. That, say they,is the only way to find out. So wehave searched for a college Apolloand bombardments upon the under¬graduate council, bobbing up amongduller and sounder copy.With this same disregard of law,this same liking for a gambler’schance, The Daily Maroon nowplunges into untried waters. It maystomp, some afternoon, into the po¬lite drawing-room of Mnie. Phoenix,nee Circle; but that is not its chiefpurpose. It proposes to invade therealms of literature, opinion, and theaits (seven of them, we believe).And it proposes to use the tactics,not of a magazine or a term-paperor a manual of instructions, but ofThe Daily Maroon. ContentsWhat It’s About Page 1Pig Knuckles and College ... 1College: A Paraphrase 1Psychopathia 2Memoirs of a Chorus Lady ... 2A Bewitched Story-Teller .... 3Before Desire: A Poem 3Circle: A Poem 5Parting: A Poem 5Adios: A Poem 7College: A ParaphraseSo we members of the AmericanUniversities are the final, highly pol¬ished product of an ultra-moderncivilization! A pleasing conceit, butfortunately, untrue. Instead we layclaim by our actions to the title ofanachronism. Our century is not theearly Twentieth, but the late Seven¬teenth. And, further, we are of Eng¬land, rather than of America.“In England, 1660 marked a ratherwide adoption, toward life in gen¬eral, of that attitude which, as dis¬tinguished from the Chivalrous view,is describable as Gallantry. I haveread that the secret of Gallantry isto accept the pleasures of life lei¬surely, and its inconveniences with ashrug; as well as that, among otherrequisites, the gallant person will al¬ways consider the world with a smileof toleration and his own doings witha smile of honest amusement, andHeaven with a smile which is not dis¬trustful,— being thoroughly persuad¬ed that God is kindlier than thegenteel would regard as rational.“In fine, the gallant person is awell-balanced sceptic, who compre¬hends that he knows very little, andprobably amounts to somewhat less,but has the grace to keep his tem¬per . . .”(Continued on page 7) PIG KNUCKLESAND^ COLLEGEThe American Student EatsThings and Thinks ThingsOn His Way Home.AFTER hearing a hearty lectureon The Study of Celtic Liter¬ature and enjoying a meal at theBerghof restaurant where a two inchcollar of foam embraces a glass ofless than one-half of one per centbeer, I climbed the stairway of anelevated station ajid waited for atrain. Visions of the evening weredepicted in my mind as the coachthrobbed and bumped over the rails. . . there were heaps and heaps ofwords, meaningless words; and therewas a spotted menu with calves liverand pig knuckles advertised at thirty-five cents a plate. It behooves me toelaborate upon the pig knuckles thatI ordered . . . large, well-boiied oneswith plenty of meat and a great dealmore fat; fat with the tissue efficient¬ly torn apart by hours of stiff boiling.They were a rarity and a delicacyfor one who cares for such fatty stuff,and I being not of the Celts but ofthe rubicund Teutons do like lim-burger cheese, sauer kraut and goose,Lager beer, and pig knuckles. So itwas-that I had visions of more pigknuckles instead of more knowledgeof Celtic mannerisms when I left thetrain at Hawthorne."QO YOU are going to enter thelaw school?” queried a friend.“So you have decided to make your¬self the slave of your own creation. . . you are going to make yourselfa debtor and the social order in whichyou live the collector of every ounceof goodness and badness that you pos¬sess?” My friend laughed as one(Continued on page 5)THE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENTPSYCHOPATHIA THE STAFFWe shall use the anonymity thiscolumn affords as we see fit. In othcrwords, we shall very freely dispenseour own ideas. We shall never feelit to be necessary to apologize forany sentiment expressed in this col¬umn. In short, we are proud of ourdepravity.We are certain of ourself -and ourline. Until a short time ago we be¬lieved that there did not exist awoman whom we couldn’t overcomewith uninteresting ease in a contestof wits, but now we’re not so sure.We might easily be the loser in about with the charming lady who wasin a class with us last quarter. Dur¬ing a discussion of Art, in which theinstructor unburdened himself ofseveral amusing platitudes, she smiledup at him and said sweetly, “Profes¬sor, won’t you give us your views ontheology? They ought to be inter¬esting, too.” The poor man was flab¬bergasted.The big blond boy who had flunkedout of an Eastern gentleman’s finish¬ing school and who tarried but short¬ly at our own noble institution oflearning, gave us much amusement.Three times a week he would dropinto our room after we had retiredfor the night, sit down heavily onthat part of the anatomy immediate¬ly below the solar plexus, and breathesweet essence of juniper in our face.Then he would recount the evening’spleasure. His proudest boast was thathe had drunk the president of thelocal chapter of Kappa Beta Phi fyes,there is such an organization here)under the table.But in a moment of weakness heconfided that he was not as old ashe looked, but was only eighteen,nor was he the man of the world hesounded, for he was exceedinglybashful in the presence of girls.We should describe him as typical¬ly collegiate.We are told that girls at North¬western are expelled if caught smok¬ing. We wonder what penalty the Besides members of the regularstaff of The Daily Maroon, theseeditors have served as a specialstaff in the preparation of thisissue:Joseph KalishAlvin LundCornelius OsgoodBetty Trimblemen must suffer if they overcut theirknitting class.Thank God, our wom¬en are left to work out their ownsalvation without unnecessary Uni¬versity supervision.By devious routes a story told onhimself by a well-known professorreaches us. It appears that he deliv¬ered a course of lectures at his AlmaMater in the East, and at the con¬clusion of the series gave a summaryof his attitude toward life and lit¬erature. When he was through, ayoung man said, “Professor, do youreally believe in the utterly childishphilosophy you have just expounded?We, the members of the class, con¬sider it a direct insult to our intelli¬gence to be asked to believe that anyapparently intelligent adult believesas you say you do.”Draw your own conclusions.Higher salaries for instructors? Ofcourse. Let the University continueon' its path, the ultimate goal ofwhich is the formation of an OldMaids’ Home. Except for the fewoutstanding exceptions (who are al¬ways pointed at with pride) the vari¬ous faculties are made up, for themost part, of mentally under-devel¬oped products of American graduateschools. Contemplation of the grad¬uates working for higher degrees atthe University of Chicago, one ofthe best graduate schools in thecountry, will show the poor materialfrom which our teachers are se¬lected,SILENUS MEMOIRS OF ACHORUS LADYI. I Begin My EducationSomeone is always asking me totell about my experiences on thestage the minute they hear me men¬tion the fact that I have been there.To tell the truth, I never mention itunless it just happens to come up inthe conversation, because I am notso proud of it since my aunt ravedso. She said that it was a pity thatI had used my own name because mywealthy relative did not approve otpeople with theatrical backgroundsor of people who had any back¬ground whatever. She always hassaid that one should never get one’sname in the paper or coma beforethe eyes of the public, that a truelady is always inconspicuous and inthe background. As far as I am con¬cerned, though, I wouldn’t be a wall¬flower for anybody, and, besides, itwouldn’t have done any good be¬cause I was already into it before Iknew that she wouldn’t like it. Well,that’s enough about the family’s atti¬tude on the subject, except that Wiymother said hat she knew it wouldn’tdo any good to tell me not to do itbecause I had always done exactlyas I_pleased, anyway, and when Italked to my father on the Ouijaboard he said that I should finish myeducation. Of course, he wasn’t inany position to stop me if I w'antedto do it, so I did.T had always been dancing aroundat the Woman’s Club, the Rotary,and Kiwanis banquets, and Campfiregirls entertainments in the smalltown where I was born. Everyonetold my parents that I had greattalent and that it was a pity I could¬n’t go to the city to study. Well,my mother and I called their bluffand when my father died, we did.That is, she went first to get settledand left me at a rooming house athome. I certainly had a good timewhen she had gone. A boy and Iused to do exhibition dances at the(Continued on page 5)THE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENTA BEWITCHEDSTORY-TELLERThe Baron Sets Forth a NewTheory About Hawthorneand His Mystic LadiesWithin the confines of my cham¬ber you will meet my fascinatingfriend, Steen Helmar, Baron D’Onge,whom you may, perchance, haveseen in the late afternoon glidingnonchalantly about the Chateau Ma¬drid. “Le Baron,” of Belgian birth,is pleasingly tall, of arrogant face,and extraordinarily charming of de¬meanor which he exerts in favor ofthe American heiress and, in a meas¬ure, becomes a Scylla for any whochance the Parisian shores. He islavishly egocentric and not unintelli-gently so, but the gift which endearshim to me has made him the paragonof liars.The Baron arrives and slides him¬self onto a well-cushioned couch.. ‘‘Why the scowl, ‘Sterne,’ ” say I.‘‘I’ve just discovered an extraordi¬nary woman from out of that God¬forsaken West of yours!”‘‘Marry her.”— emphatically.“I can’t. She’s like all the rest ofthe interesting women in the worldand has no money.”“Where did you find the marble?”asks the Baron finally, picking up alittle statue of a faun and jugglingit indecorously.“An old woman with a dreamySpanish shawl sells them near the farend of the Pont Sully. Remembereda novel of Hawthorne’s and boughtit the other day. Ever read him?”“Me? O yes. I know all aboutHawthorne.”“Personal friend, ‘Stenie’?”A moon cloud smile glimmersacross his face, but he goes right on.“My grandfather knew and enter¬tained him during his sojourn inItaly. The old man is dead now someyears, but I remember queer recol¬lections of his association with theauthor. As the story goes, someworthy sire of Hawthorne’s held ajudgeship in the queer fishing port1 of Salem, surrounded by a peoplewhom I smile to say were no lesscredulous than our transatlantic vis¬itors are today. Certainly there re¬mains in the law annals of that townthe record of the condemnation ofa number of women who were burnedfor being versed in witchcraft. Oneof these was a young woman of And¬over, who, perhaps, because of herremarkable beauty and a mysticsympathy with an alien God, wasbrought before the venerable ^udgeas an uncomplacent figure in a Puri¬tan wilderness. Although the rec¬ords themselves are scant in descrip¬tion, the story has been handed downhow she, having faced her accuserswith a strange and superluminarydispassionateness, placed a curse onthe grey head, who, in the misguidedlight of his time, sentenced her twoBEFORE DESIREGive back my dream, moststrangely wise,That was a sunset—colored thing,For romance still is wanderingAnd / am troubled by your eyes.Charles E. Noyes.small children with the memory of asorely persecuted mother.“Now Hawthorne, as iie discreetlytold my grandfather, believed strong¬ly in the transmigration of the souland the hereditary guidance of aspirit for good or evil. As strangeas it may seem, it has been believedthat this celebrated genius wps do¬ing a penance for his grandfather’ssoul. The driving force which camefrom unviolated solitude, the almostunnatural loveliness of his tone qual¬ities, the unfathomable well fromwhich he drew his rare occultism, allbespeak an untangible connectionwith a hidden past.“You may smile, my over-educatedfriend, but have you ever noticedthat most striking female characterwho invades 50 many 'of his stories:Zenobia, Rappaccini’s daughter; Hes- ChuckAndersonsays:"The University of ChicagoBookstore is coming to bemore and more what theideal college bookstore should>e—a place wh' -e good booksare sold; an institution toencourage the appreciationof literature and the buyingof good books by the stu¬dents. Its recent changes inthe arrangement of the booksection and its policy ofkeeping in stock the best ofthe new Action are doingtheir part to perform thesemost important functions ofa college bookstore. It is aAne idea to encourage stu¬dents to come in and browsearound.”And of course we all knowthat Chuck knows what he’stalking about 1We hope, too, that you’re notmissing the chance to get firstcopies of the crop of earlySPRING NOVELS, by suchwell-known and enjoyable'au¬thors as Phillip Gibbs, ArthurTrain, Kathleen Norris, FannyHurst, and Stephen Benet.They form a diverting and in¬teresting list.THE UNIVERSITYOF CHICAGOBOOKSTORE“The Official Bookstore”5802 Ellis Hall4 THE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENTter, Miriam? These denizens of asemi-mystic world who, in the sameway, seem beautiful and inexpressi¬bly terrible. What of Beatrice with‘a voice as rich as a tropical sunset,and which made Giovanni, thoughhe knew not why, think of deep huesof purple or crimson and of perfumeheavily delectable?’ Whence camethe ‘deep black eyes’ and dark hairof Hester Prynne? Who had ‘a com¬plexion in which there was no ros¬eate bloom,— dark eyes, into whichyou might look as deeply as yourglance would go, and still be con¬scious of a depth that you had notsounded, though it lay open to theday,’ a beauty such as ‘Rachel mighthave been, when Jacob deemed herworth the wooing seven years, andseven more; or Judith was, whenripen to be what Judith was, whenshe vanquished Holfernes with herbeauty, and slew him for too muchadoring’? Who else but Miriamf“Zenobia drowned, Beatrice pois¬oned with an antitoxin, and Ayl- :mer’s wife sacrificed for too muchbeauty. Ah, when I think of how 1have allowed Hawthorne to entice mewith his subtle simplicity along theuncaressing curves of his catacombsof esoteric fancy, I wonder if I, too,have not caught the contagion of hiscurse. I have seen a vision of awoman standing on my- hearthstone, jdressed in Vermillion velvet trimmed ;in cloth of gold around the wrists'and neck. Her hair was a shineless ■black that stole away in gentle waves 1across her ears. She smiled at meone long and penetrating smile whichseemed to drag me from the shadesof reverie, and after she had left,there was a faint odor of Easternperfume like the air around the fra¬grant spice wharves of the Jewishmerchants. It may be that time andtoo much thinking on this vision castein female figure has rendered my ownsensibilities tender to the sight ofher translucent touches in the faceof others. Within the hour, I tellyou, I have seen a face which mademe tremble, run away, and now re¬turn.”At that, the little marble faun re¬posing in his hand cracks with a sud¬den pressure and a gentle burst The Message Of ModernismSeries of Nine Pamphlets, Each Containing Two Sermons$1.00 (including postage)12c eachTHE MODERN IDEA OF GODTHE HUMAN STRUGGLEFROM TRADITIONAL TO MODERNCHRISTIANITYGOD IN JESUSEVOLUTION AND CHRISTIAN FAITHWHY I DO NOT QUIT PREACHINGTHE CHRISTIAN LIFEMODERNISM AND SALVATIONTHE WORLD BEYOND OUR SENSESAUTHORITY AND IS THE BIBLE TRUE?THE MODERN VIEW OF THE BIBLEA RATIONAL BASIS FOR RELIGIONSTEALING A MAN S RELIGIONTRUE CHRISTIAN LIBERALISMTHE REFORMATION NEEDEDTHE VICTORY OF JESUSFUNDAMENTALISM VERSUS MODERN¬ISMTHE GOAL OF TRUE CHRISTIANITYTHE INDIVIDUALThese sermons by Dr. Alfred W. Wishart are published bythe Extension Club as an aid to a better understanding ofconstructive modem religious teaching. Voluntary subscrip¬tions have made it possible to send thousands of these ser¬mons to ministers and students. There is no financial profitfor any one.University students will find these sermons helpful and in¬spiring. Orders promptly filled byTHE EXTENSION CLUBFOUNTAIN STREET BAPTIST CHURCHGRAND RAPIDS, MICHIGANof lime-dust floats undisturbedlythrough the air. Now that you see what were tryingto do perhaps you can help us do it.The Training School for Jewish Soetal Work offers a fif¬teen months' course of graduate study In Jewish FamilyCase Work, Child Care, Community Centers, Federationsand Health Centers.Several tuition scholarships and maintenance fellowshipsare available to especially qualified students.For further information, address the Director,THE TRAINING SCHOOL FOR JEWISH SOCIAL WORK(Imtiotod h the Nottonol Confer me* of Jrontk Sociml Sorvtct)210 West 01st Street New ToA CityTHE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENT 5ADIOSOur roads crossed there.Where the mountain cuddles downTo meet the bay;Our roads crossed thereAlthough the eye can seeJust one highway.The sway of palms, 1 see them yetThe scent of jasmine sweet uponthe air.White sand, and dark blue sea—Ah, do I regretThat our roads crossed there?Betty Trimble.MEMOIRS OF A CHORUS LADY(Continued from page 2)dance halls there, and, of course,everyone was talking. I know it anddidn’t care because I knew I wasgood and they were just jearous, tTiesame as they were when I finally ar¬rived at the peak of my career inthe chorus. They all said nothinggood could come of that. But it did,because I travelled a lot and learneda lot about sex which I never woufohave learned at home, and which allyoung girls should know.Finally my mother sent for me tocome to the city and I started rightin taking dancing lessons at a studiodowntown.I will tell you all about it nextweek, because I have used up all myspace with this much, and have onlyjust begun.PIG KNUCKLES AND COLLEGE(Continued from page 1)laughs when he sees a condemnedman drop from the scaffold ... notreally a laugh at all but the soundsof a mental convulsion. “But whatam I going to do?” I found myselfanswering, “Life isn’t such a con¬venient thing that goes out of itsway affording comforts for men andwomen . . . life, I take it, spends itstime inventing means and methods bywhich to make all of us Philistines.”TO BE a citizen of a city that hasThe World's Greatest Newspaperand one of the world’s greatest uni¬versities is, indeed, a luxury. To be a reader of one and a student of theother is, without a doubt, nothing lessthan a celestial privilege. I feel thatI should become a hawker for thissublime state of mine . . .to hawkmy wares to second and third cousinswho live in Clarinda, Iowa, and Belle¬vue, Illinois. I am an exalted beingwho has constructed a beau ideal ofmyself because I read the World’sGreatest Newspaper and attend oneof the world’s greatest universities.It may have never occurred to thereader that all barroom flies are re¬markably the same; if you swat atone and miss, for the world, you can¬not tell what fly you did not hit; soclever are the little devils in their artof masquerading. And so it is withthe thousands of little flies that buzzin and out of the modern universities... no matter how many are swattedand crushed beneath the impact ofthe swatter, other, identical, well-meaning little flies come to take theirplace.ON THE Continent they have de¬vised a method of distinguishingthe high from the lowly. . . there arebrilliant ribbons that men wearacross their breasts, and woodenshoes that others fit upon their feet.There, on the Continent, the peopleshave learned through sufficient revo¬lutions that there is no such thing asequality, be it material wealth, men¬tality, social prestige or politicalbungling. The Continental peasantsimply fought to get the heel from offof his throat, and when it was re¬moved and he could breathe, he reallydid not care upon what part of hisanatomy the heel rested. In America,however, the natives fought for theamputation of the heel; they wantedto be sure that it was gone, i, e., theywanted all heels removed but theirown. And so it has come about inAmerica that men are not known bytheir ribbons or their wooden shoes,but by the size of their heels.I HAVE often visited a flour millwhere with the taking of severalsteps I could first handle the wheat asit flowed into the stone mills and thenthe white flower where it left thewhirling reels. .The flour, I was told, PARTINGNo word so sweet as when wesaidJust “au revoir" and not “good¬bye.”No winding pathway ever ledTo vistas quite so far and high.Those promise-words when spokenlowMake dreams most dully-coloredthings,Two heads are after held just so,One heart, at least, with laughtersings.Betty Trimble.was made by a patent process thathad proved to be an economicalmethod ... a saver of money andlabor. Day after day the mills of theflour company turn; day after day,grains of wheat, peculiarly differentfrom one another, are “processed” in¬to flour that has nothing more thanthe individuality of flour. I find thatI cannot blame the mill owners be¬cause they manufacture flour that isidentically the same, day after day.They would change their product but! they are prohibited . . . flour is flour... it little concerns the makers ofpure food laws what the housewifedoes with the millers’ product. Andso when I hear a university studentcomplain of the system in which hei has been placed or into which he! placed himself, I am not prone tosympathize with his miserable war-whooops. He, it seems to me, is noother than the kernel that endeavorsto leap from the spout ... he isafraid of the milling process that isto come.But the milling process of the uni¬versity is not equipped with kerneltight spouts . . . men and women,unlike kernels of wheat, are made thevictims of their brains. There are op¬portunities and opportunities for the! human kernels to escape the crunch¬ing of the mills . . . and from thequantity of wheat that arrives at thismill it is pitiful, indeed, to see the lit¬tle flour that flows from the finishingreels. The directors of a flour millcan figure their pronts and loss for(Continued on page 7)A -nev) and olea/ar¬able addition toCHtcA.90 /elect laXehour Attraction, inthe spirit of the/mart supper club.SntartaftimenttXAtcZ dancing to thamart onchdnrfttg‘TPt't&S'iC **ika titMinf tune,soothing^ Sy/tcojodition,perf+ci rkyinrrv ofiDaJter Zur*tirttst?£Z%-irorchestraGoldeft Lily*Joutk Jict&yftert Jjfc&cZ €&/&309 e. SdrfteZd %lVd,<it i/ie7THE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENTCOLLEGE; A PARAPHRASE(Continued from page 1)In'1 American Universities 1900marked a rather wide adoptiontoward life in general, of that atti¬tude which, etc. Why not? Do we,while at school, consider life to be asomber tragedy, or a realistic novel?Why, not a whit. It is a grand com¬edy, wherein all the parts are castfor our special delectation. We aremomentarily scholars, and politicians,and athletes, and men of the world,and esthetes. Do we not accept ourpleasures leisurely, and surely outinconveniences, classes, flunk noticesand such, we accept with a shrug.But elsewhere in the creed of Gal¬lantry it is stated that in spite ofthe comprehension of his generalworthlessness the gallant person willadmit to no one, and least of all tohimself, this fact. So we have an airof fine sincerity about our fraterni¬ties, and our campus activities, andour athletics, that defies attempts todiscover the true attitude.As a parallel, the courtier of Wy¬cherley's day was an expert at amor¬ous dalliance, a hard drinker, a vi¬cious fighter when necessary, and notseldom a fine scholar. He was con¬vincingly serious about all except hislast quality, which he hid quite care¬fully.The gallant cavalier carefullyavoided the semblance of seriousthinkingly, but he could, and did, dis¬course charmingly of the writing ofhis day, he knew the light music ofhis contemporaries, he attended thetheatre religiously, and his table withas never been surpassed. In short"of a gentleman it was everywhereexpected as the requisites of socialsuccess, to make improper advancesgracefully; and to dress not morethan a month behind the Court ofFontainebleau; and to fence wellenough to pink his man in an occa¬sional duel back of Montagne house;and to say resistlessly in French thatwhich he ought not to say at all."The gallant collegiate would heostracized if it were known that heconsidered his classes other than hor¬rible bores, but he does know the in¬consequential and some of the im¬portant writing now being done, he talks understandingly, and with muchappreciation of Jazz, he has attendedmost of the shows in town, and hisline is absolutely unique. In short,of a college man it is everywhere ex¬pected, as the requisites of social suc¬cess, to use for indecent ends a linewhose charm is equalled only by itseffectiveness; and to dress not morethan a month behind Harvard andYale; and to be enough of an ath¬lete to make an occasional touch¬down ; and to tell resistlessly storiesthat he ought not to tell at all.CIRCLEAh, there coir be ito silence halfso sweetAs that of our two footsteps ovthe street.Of half desire that tec might bemore near;Subdued by dread, that we’d nolonger hearNo hope is there that we mag beagainAs once we were, immersed in thatclose painOur trembling voices wavingbanal handsFrom time to time the fingerstouching strandsOf feeling that we did not knowwas there,By those caressing fingers halflaid bare.Betty Trimble.Furthermore, of Congreve’s wom¬en it is said, “For they are in every¬thing pre-eminently adorable, thesemendacious, subtle, pleasure loving,babbling, generous, volatile, brave,witty, and sumptuous young jill-flirts who rule in the Utopia of Gal¬lantry. So all true cognoscenti muststay forever enamored of them; oftheir alert eyes, their little satin-slip¬pered feet, their saticy tip-tilted littlenoses, their scornful little carminemouths, and their glittering rest¬less little hands—for they are allMignonnes.” And there is the co-ed.She, too, abides by the rules of Gal¬ lantry, but with this difference. Sheis never so misled by her emotions.that she forgets her creed; the mensometimes are.It is not, then, remarkable that thetrue collegiate can be differentiatednot only from the callow freshtnanwho tries to copy his mannerisms, butalso from the clerk who carefully imi¬tates his clothes. The Alumnus, too,is almost immediately distinguishable.Unfortunately, Gallantry is alwaysleft at the University when its fol¬lower leaves. It is a shining, vari¬colored garment that is worn for fouryears and then forgotten except forodd moments.PIG KNUCKLES AND COLLEGE(Continued from page 5)the coming year . . . but the direc¬tors of a university, never.^pHERE seems to be an Americandesire to cultivate good taste inthe way that Mary learned to swimJw being warned to stay out of the^Ivater. There seems to be a goodAmerican myth that culture and goodtaste is a little germ that innoculatesthe student who spends four or moreyears in the region of a universityor college. Yet, I have known good,honest men and women who havelived in a college town a life time . . .but they never relinquished their de¬sire to eat pig knuckles and sauerkraut. Intellectually, they never be¬came the elect, although they hadspent more years in the collegiate at¬mosphere than had any of the col¬lege’s alumni.It seems strange that there hasgrown in America a social* routinethat requires, at least, the entranceto a first class college or university.It is the thing to do ... to sendRalph or Betty to the intellectual cen¬ters of the states and to wait for thetransformation. Automatically, theybecome a Smith girl or a Harvardman. And that title is enough to as¬sure them social prestige . . . whocares what they really know . . .who cares what they have actuallydone . . . the deadly, vicious littlegerm called Culture and Taste neverfails to produce a collegiate epidemic.8 THE DAILY MAROON SUPPLEMENTCOLONIAL“PRINTS”And We Don’tMean MaybeColonial PressPrinters1510 E. 56th St. Mid. 0864 AND so it was as I left the ele¬vated train at Hawthorn that mymind was filled with what I have justwritten and my stomach with pigknuckles and sauer kraut. Terrible!I can hear from a thousand directions. . . “Pig knuckles and sauer kraut”in the same breath with “culture andtaste!” But I might as well admitthat I cannot afford to eat the swineas it is served on the mahogany tablesof the Berghof restaurant ... itwas at a professor’s house that I atethe hog ... a professor who is avery demon when it comes to innoeu-lating those little germs called Cul¬ture and Taste. For over the dinnertable I smelled the odours of steam¬ing fat and tasted the cream of in¬tellectual discussion.L. T. A.THE UNIVERSITYOF CHICAGOOffer* through It* DOWNTOWN CollegeLATE AFTERNOON,EVENING andSATURDAY CLASSESEnglish. Commerce and Administration.Public Speaking, History, Bus. Commun¬ication. Education. Business English, Math¬ematics, Literature, Spanish, SecretarialWork, Natural Science, Political Economy, jAstronomy. Physic*. French. Psychology,Biblical Literature, German, etc.All Courses Credited TowardUniversity DegreesTWO-HOUR SESSIONS ONCE ORTWICE A WEEK.Address all correspondence to:Dean, University CollegeThe University of ChicagoPhone Midway 0t>00—Local 239 Boi 1000 Woodworth’s ForBOOKSRead this week’s bestsellers:LOOSGentlemen Prefer BlondsMOOREHearts of HickoryBAILEYThe Blue WindowWHITESecret HarborLARDNER, RING• The Love NestERSKINEHelen of TroyNORRISThe Black FlemingsJAMESONThree KingdomsGEZYCKAGlass HousesNORRISPig IronAsk for our“Books of the Month"CatalogSERVICE WITH A SMILEWOODWORTH’SBOOKSTORE1311 East 57th StreetHyde Park 1690OPEN EVENINGS UNTIL 9